[i was driving faster through the appalachians]

[minervacat]

on saturday night i dreamt i was pregnant with ryan ross's love child, and i can't even, people, so instead, have a list of posts i have not made, for a variety of reasons, in the last week:

• the one about the difference between "chicago" and "metro chicagoland at large", complete with helpful accompanying photos of my shower curtain, which is a map of the chicago transit authority system, and also a detour into a rant about why chicagoland residents cannot call their highways by their numbers like normal people, because jesus christ which one's the eisenhower again and how the hell did i end up in milwaukee i wanted to go to iowa.
  
• an epic list of all the things i miss about chicago.
  
• an incoherent post of gibberish about how i take back all the bad things i said about the nike compression jersey uniforms during last year's basketball tournament, because JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, MARCUS GINYARD.
  
• obligatory every-six-months post of car paranoia.
  
• the post about how, yes, information scientists like myself would tell you that there probably is a "best practice" way to tag in both flat systems like delicious and hierarchical systems like livejournal, but, frankly, i'm not going to tell anybody how to do anything on the internet because that way lies madness and wank and probably flame wars and me stomping around citing academic literature in all caps, which is just no good for anybody.
  
• a second epic list of all the things i miss about chicago that i forgot the first time.
  
• a post about why the versus network feels the need to have more than one two-hour show on the greatest high school football rivalries. (answer: i still have no idea. i fell asleep watching the breakfast club instead.)
  
• corollary to the above: a post about why we get the versus network but not espnu. rage blackout.
  
• tangent from above: emilio estevez: how so mysteriously hot as a young man? how so mysteriously looking just like your dad the older you get?
  
• corollary to the immediate above: martin sheen, how so awesome?
  
• daily updates about the state of my respiratory system. (still gross, but getting better.)
  
• a post about how, when i worked in recruiting, i used to stay up to watch the late basketball games on espn and the deuce for work-related reasons, and i've never really broken myself of the habit, even when i couldn't give a good goddamn about the games involved. thursday: utah/washington basketball; friday: hawaii/nevada football. saturday morning, shep. said, "did you end up getting wasted and sleeping in?" i said, "no, i stayed up until 3 watching colt brennan freeze his nuts off and i can't even remember who won."
  
• many, many posts about being a two-cat household; only in multiple animal households, i think, do you have to do such things as stand in the kitchen with your morning tea and say, "in this house, we only sniff butts if everyone involved wants their butt sniffed! BUTT SNIFFING IS A CONSENSUAL ACT, YOU GUYS." i also feel this is something that andy hurley probably has to say to pete wentz a lot.
  
• a post about how i always feel that i should love elliott smith's music because he writes such good lyrics except whenever i download elliott smith albums i always end up deleting them because, fact, i fucking hate his music.
  
• also, i didn't think about making a post about this during this week, but talking about elliott smith reminded me: my dirty shameful musical secret is that i hate radiohead, i have always hated radiohead, and there is nothing you can do about it. the line to defriend me for that blasphemy starts over there. *points*

also:
the recruiting storylines on friday night lights are so realistic, guys, i can't even tell you; i worked with so many kids like smash -- and so many smart parents like his mom who couldn't get through to their kids -- and he just breaks my heart. i know how this story ends, i've seen it, and it isn't a pretty thing.

i'm still wary of the murder storyline, although i'm hoping we can get some decent moving-toward-resolution next week, and the one with matt and the nurse, but i'm really settling in to this season, and there's been so much good fic fodder. where is my julie/tyra after last week's canonical hand-holding? where is my tyra/lyla after this week's episode? I REFUSE TO HAVE TO DO IT ALL MYSELF.

conversation had this weekend while watching carolina/georgia tech:lincoln financial football announcer: *blah blah blah carolina's kicker wants to be a clothing designer*
min.: *falls over flailing*
shep.: what i need from you ...
min.: ... is connor barth/pete wentz, i know.
shep.: I LIKE HOW I DON'T EVEN HAVE TO FINISH MY SENTENCE.
min.: dude, as soon as he said "fashion design," i went to that place.
college football kicker/dj p.weezy. this is our life. you guys, i'm gonna write it, and it will be the most amazing appalling thing i've ever committed to text in my life. i'm gonna call it ... i don't know what i'm gonna call it yet, but it's going to be amazing, whatever it is. MARK MY WORDS.

AND FINALLY: guys, whoever nominated my stories for the mcshep awards, thank you muchly. way to flatter a girl, yo.