Give me a kiss to build a dream on and my imagination will thrive upon that kiss Sweetheart, I ask no more than this a kiss to build a dream on
(Ruby/Kalmar/Hammerstein)
Your meter fits the above song pretty well.
Anyhow, I love the almost-romance underlying this. It's a good match for the one Trish wrote a while back. Death is a bit over-eager to use poison in this case, but that just makes it seem more like an ardent lover.
I'm glad you like the song. Louis Armstrong did what I think is the definitive cover of it.
Yes, I think the lover and (his?) eagerness came right through your piece. One tends to think of death as waiting patiently for old age, but this one is like a teenaged boy, trying every ruse he can think of to get her to say yes.
Yeah, I probably offended the teenaged boy, too, that I think he's so obvious, but he is. I don't blame him, but I'm not going to succomb right now just because it's going to happen eventually.
Which is why one tells teenaged boys (and Death), "Now hold on. I want to enjoy life as it is, first."
Off topic... great job on dyno_drabbles this week. I loved that picture of friendship and camaraderie in the midst of what was always an affliction, at least for Remus.
and my imagination will thrive upon that kiss
Sweetheart, I ask no more than this
a kiss to build a dream on
(Ruby/Kalmar/Hammerstein)
Your meter fits the above song pretty well.
Anyhow, I love the almost-romance underlying this. It's a good match for the one Trish wrote a while back. Death is a bit over-eager to use poison in this case, but that just makes it seem more like an ardent lover.
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I suck at getting meter right, so I threw it out the mental window this time. But it didn't suck too badly.
Well, I think Death always wears cyanide lipstick lol. Or something like that. I was trying to get across that lover feel though. Thanks :)
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Yes, I think the lover and (his?) eagerness came right through your piece. One tends to think of death as waiting patiently for old age, but this one is like a teenaged boy, trying every ruse he can think of to get her to say yes.
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Which is why one tells teenaged boys (and Death), "Now hold on. I want to enjoy life as it is, first."
Off topic... great job on dyno_drabbles this week. I loved that picture of friendship and camaraderie in the midst of what was always an affliction, at least for Remus.
Reply
Oh, thank you! I was, for once, actually nice to a werewolf, LOL. Usually I'm all angst... But thank you again! I'm glad you enjoyed it.
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