God is in the rain...
Wow.. it's really been a long time since I posted! I actually haven't been online all that much in recent months, due to hardships mental, physical, and familial. Or correction.. I have been online, but not on the Internet. I've been using World of Warcraft as topical anaethesia. But, things are on the up and up for the moment, although I'm not counting my chickens. Suffice to say, I think I can safely socialize again without going to pieces.
That being said, part of the "mental" mentioned up there is that I had a major "going down" period, followed by another huge leap forward. For those who haven't known me very long, ten years ago, I sustained a head injury. Ten years ago the doctors said that after six months, I wouldn't get any better than that. A year after the accident, they said "that was it". Now, a decade later, I am still healing. Shows how much doctors know about stubborn people. ^_-
Which brings me to the heading of my post. Since that injury, I have been deathly afraid of rain. I mean, I would literally get the shakes if a drop touched me. I would shroud myself in huge raincoats and carry large umbrellas just so it would not touch me. Then, after this most recent bottoming-out, I was getting out of work, and it took me a minute to realize... it was drizzling, and I was standing outside.
I've been gradually working my way up, finding out that I can actually walk in rain now without going to pieces. Not only from a store to a car, but yesterday I did the ultimate test. I walked the mile home in steady rain. Not a downpour, but enough to soak me by the time I got home (or actually, soak my coat. The only parts of me wet were my glasses, pantlegs, and shoes). AND I DIDN'T MIND AT ALL! Just the natural "ick, wet" that everybody feels.
It's such a tremendous step for me.. and at the rate I've been eating fish and needing exercise, I think my brain wants to go another step. Whee! I'll take every bit of improvement I can get.
On a slightly lighter topic, due to all the stuff going on in my personal life, it's been bad enough that I haven't written much. I have dribs and drabs, and a couple stories for the "Howl's Moving Castle" fandom that just need a few scenes to pull the flashes of creativity that worked through my wish not to think together.
About the only thing I have done in the past few months is levelled a dwarf paladin in World of Warcraft to nearly 50, as well as becoming the mother of a whole brood of alts! Amazing what immersion to deal with pain can do.
I'm also lurking in a new fandom. I'll be a sideliner in this one, especially since the only ideas I have for it writing-wise are totally insane! *points to icon* As a longtime "Phan"girl, the movie "V for Vendetta" caught me by the jugular. I just went for the fourth time last night, and am considering trying to con my mother into going with me for a fifth viewing tomorrow. It's an action movie, but it really makes you think. But I also admit to having a schoolgirl crush. ^_- I seem to have a thing for homicidal geniuses in masks. Of course, it didn't help matters his opening speech includes such flair and vast vocabulary of words beginning with the letter "v"... Ah, seduction by alliteration! I'm such a geek.
Makes me happy that LJ now gives freeloaders like me 6 icons to play with! YAY!
That being said, part of the "mental" mentioned up there is that I had a major "going down" period, followed by another huge leap forward. For those who haven't known me very long, ten years ago, I sustained a head injury. Ten years ago the doctors said that after six months, I wouldn't get any better than that. A year after the accident, they said "that was it". Now, a decade later, I am still healing. Shows how much doctors know about stubborn people. ^_-
Which brings me to the heading of my post. Since that injury, I have been deathly afraid of rain. I mean, I would literally get the shakes if a drop touched me. I would shroud myself in huge raincoats and carry large umbrellas just so it would not touch me. Then, after this most recent bottoming-out, I was getting out of work, and it took me a minute to realize... it was drizzling, and I was standing outside.
I've been gradually working my way up, finding out that I can actually walk in rain now without going to pieces. Not only from a store to a car, but yesterday I did the ultimate test. I walked the mile home in steady rain. Not a downpour, but enough to soak me by the time I got home (or actually, soak my coat. The only parts of me wet were my glasses, pantlegs, and shoes). AND I DIDN'T MIND AT ALL! Just the natural "ick, wet" that everybody feels.
It's such a tremendous step for me.. and at the rate I've been eating fish and needing exercise, I think my brain wants to go another step. Whee! I'll take every bit of improvement I can get.
On a slightly lighter topic, due to all the stuff going on in my personal life, it's been bad enough that I haven't written much. I have dribs and drabs, and a couple stories for the "Howl's Moving Castle" fandom that just need a few scenes to pull the flashes of creativity that worked through my wish not to think together.
About the only thing I have done in the past few months is levelled a dwarf paladin in World of Warcraft to nearly 50, as well as becoming the mother of a whole brood of alts! Amazing what immersion to deal with pain can do.
I'm also lurking in a new fandom. I'll be a sideliner in this one, especially since the only ideas I have for it writing-wise are totally insane! *points to icon* As a longtime "Phan"girl, the movie "V for Vendetta" caught me by the jugular. I just went for the fourth time last night, and am considering trying to con my mother into going with me for a fifth viewing tomorrow. It's an action movie, but it really makes you think. But I also admit to having a schoolgirl crush. ^_- I seem to have a thing for homicidal geniuses in masks. Of course, it didn't help matters his opening speech includes such flair and vast vocabulary of words beginning with the letter "v"... Ah, seduction by alliteration! I'm such a geek.
Makes me happy that LJ now gives freeloaders like me 6 icons to play with! YAY!