Reliance, Part 4/4
Title: Reliance
Author: millionminds
Chapter: 4/4
Fandom: Left 4 Dead 2
Pairing: Nick/Ellis
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Graphic sex between men, slightly OOC!Nick, OOC!Ellis, cursing, slight violence.
Disclaimer: I don't own L4D2 or anything it entails. Don't sue me.
Life really had a way of throwing shit your way sometimes. Things would be going well one moment, and then in a flash, something goes wrong and it all crumbles before you. One bad thing after the other and the next thing you know, you’re wondering if it’s even worth it anymore.
Ellis had passed out mere seconds upon reaching the boat. He’d tried to get to his feet, then stumbled forward and just collapsed, completely spent. He must’ve really been trying to make himself useful since they’d taken him along rather than abandoning him. Maybe he was just desperate not to end up like Coach. And if he went down, he’d go down fighting tooth and nail.
The mechanic woke up to Rochelle and Nick discussing something in front of him. They were crouched around a pot of noodles, and when they heard the kid stirring, they both turned on their spot to face him. Rochelle looked so relieved that Ellis could see the tears in her eyes, and Nick let out a thankful sigh. There was a small smile on his features, but nothing that surprised the mechanic too terribly much.
“How’re you holding up?” Nick questioned while Rochelle hugged Ellis gingerly, careful not to hit one of the many wounds the witch had inflicted.
Ellis waved a hand and made to sit up, letting out little grunts and whimpers as he did so. “I been better.” He answered honestly, then motioned to the pot of noodles before them. “Got enough for me in there?”
Rochelle nodded and scooped him a bowl of it, then passed it his way. “Eat up, you’re gonna need the energy.”
Ellis’ expression darkened, but he didn’t say anything. He merely started to eat his meal and didn’t say a word.
Nick noticed the change in mood. Or the lack thereof, rather. The kid seemed as brooding and contemplative as The Thinker and Nick wasn’t sure he liked that in someone like Ellis. At least he was moving enough to put food in his mouth. And then there was the whole pain factor. He probably wasn’t feeling too hot.
That in mind, the con-man reached into his pocket and pulled out a half-empty bottle of pain pills, passing it Ellis’ way.
“You look like shit, kid.”
“Thanks.” Ellis swallowed two of them, then continued on his noodles.
……………………………………………..
The next several days passed by without incident. Virgil came down to visit for a few meals, but for the most part, remained in his own cabin. Rochelle and Nick sat close to Ellis, in case something was to go wrong. They took turns going on deck for breaks. One would go up while the other sat with the kid and the other would do so when they returned. Ellis had argued that he’d be fine, but both of the other survivors seemed pretty adamant that they weren’t letting anything happen to him.
After losing Coach, it was the least they could do. They were all a little bit leary.
Rochelle had just headed off for her break, leaving Nick and Ellis behind. They both sat in the cabin, Ellis on the lone mattress and Nick leaning with his back against it in front of him. It was uncomfortably quiet, but it had been ever since the kid had awakened. His skin was pale and his eyes were sunken and tired-looking, and he seemed weaker in general.
Nick knew by now what had kept Ellis so quiet. And quite frankly, he was fed up with it. That in mind, he spoke on it.
“What stage do you figure you’re going through right now?” The con-man said, seemingly uncaring and smarmy as usual. He didn’t turn to face the younger man. “I think it’s denial right now.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Behind Nick, Ellis was clearly shocked. His jaw hung open and he sat up so abruptly that he let out a loud, pained grunt in the process.
Nick sighed, then started counting on his fingers. “Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance.” He wasn’t trying to toy with the mechanic-it was just his nature to put on his poker face when he felt it was necessary. The lump in his throat told him it was. “When you hit anger, let me know so I can go somewhere else.”
“What’re you goin’ on about, Nick?” Ellis caught on to the older man’s tone and couldn’t help but suddenly feel very afraid of what was being discussed.
“Are you really that dense?” Nick still didn’t turn to face Ellis. Instead, he hunched further over in his sitting position and lifted his knees up, letting his arms rest lazily upon them. His forearms dangled over the ground, and he was suddenly very focused on the shadows they formed upon the carpet.
“Maybe I’d get it if you actually tried to make some goddamn sense.” Ellis retorted quickly, glaring at the back of Nick’s head. “This ain’t some stupid poker game, so stop playin’ around and tell it to me straight.”
Nick’s shoulders sank, though Ellis didn’t notice. The con-man sighed, and he finally questioned after several seconds’ hesitation, “You think you’re dying, don’t you?”
Ellis went silent and sat bolt upright, eyes wide.
“I…Nick, I-“
“Don’t be a hypocrite, Ellis.” Nick hissed, and he turned on the spot, leaning a hand back to support himself as he did so. “Tell me exactly what you’re thinking.” There was a glare on the older man’s features that frightened Ellis-warned him that the man before him could see straight through him and anything other than the truth would not be tolerated. “You’re not making it very subtle if you’re trying to hide it. At least tell a goddamned Keith story or something.”
“Nick…” Ellis wondered how long the con-man had been holding back this conversation-how desperately he needed to know what other people were thinking. He wasn’t sure if he should be angry or flattered, and again, words escaped him.
“Well?”
“How long did you…?”
“Since you started sulking instead of rambling.” Nick almost repeated about just how obvious Ellis was making it, but decided against it. The mechanic looked awfully shocked sitting before him, to be honest.
And finally, Ellis gave in and let out a long sigh, reaching a tender and weak arm up to rub the back of his head. His hat rested on the ground next to the mattress.
“It’s not that I’m dyin’…” The mechanic didn’t look so sure of that phrase, but Nick let him continue, mostly out of curiosity. “It’s all the shit we done got into. I mean…we came so far and now it’s like we ain’t gonna make it much longer…”
Nick narrowed his eyes. “It’s not over, Ellis.”
Ellis shook his head, and for a brief moment, the con-man thought he saw the kid shiver. “You can keep sayin’ that, but we’re goin’ down one by one. Coach-“
“Coach died so we could keep moving, remember?”
“But I’m hurt now, and I ain’t gonna be any kinda help to y’all in this state-“
Nick’s eyes looked livid for a split second. “You’re not going to die.”
“Huh?”
“We’re not leaving you to die.” The older man’s eyes were focused so intently on Ellis’ that the kid was the first to break the eye contact. “You shot just fine when we went to get gas-“
“But you had to carry me, an’-“
“We’re almost to New Orleans.” Nick’s voice was sharp and scolding, like a mother telling her child not to say a bad word. “You’re too far to be getting all depressed.”
Ellis looked lost. His eyes grazed the mattress, then lifted up to the ceiling, then back to Nick, then repeated the process as if he wasn’t sure exactly what he was supposed to be looking at. His thoughts were jumbled and his body ached and he was physically drained, and he chose that precise moment to break right before Nick. He collapsed forward and off the mattress, arms flopping loosely around the older man’s neck and pain wracking his entire body as he did so, but he didn’t care. He let out a noise akin to a whimper and Nick reeled backward a bit, but eventually, and very awkwardly, draped an arm around the boy’s back.
“You’re not doing your injuries any good like this, Sport-“
“Shut up.” Ellis’ voice was low and intolerant, but he didn’t let go of the con-man. “Just shut up for five damn minutes.” The younger man’s hands bundled into fists around the back of Nick’s suit, and neither Ellis nor the con-man really cared. Letting out an exasperated sigh, the older man raised his other arm and pulled the mechanic closer to him. He swallowed and buried his face in Ellis’ hair.
“Thanks, Nick.” The boy finally spoke after nearly a minute of silence. “Thank you.” He repeated. “Thank you.”
The snarky remark was on the tip of Nick’s tongue, but he held it back and reminded himself, like he had done to Ellis many times before, that now was not the best time, and instead said, “What for?”
Ellis pulled away only slightly. “I…I don’t wanna die.”
Nick knew he was lying-that survival was no guarantee-, but he still said it. “You’re not. It’s going to be okay.” Besides, there was something in him that was hell-bent on making sure the three of them made it alive.
“Coach.” The younger man thought aloud, as if their former group member was right there, sitting before them. As if he was going to lift his head and acknowledge the speaking of his name. “I miss him.”
Nick didn’t say anything. Instead, he lifted one hand and let it rest on the side of Ellis’ face. He was warm, and the older man’s fingers tickled against the stubble on the kid’s chin. The digits twitched in response to the sensation, but did not pull back.
“Nick?” Ellis’ eyes were watery and red. He hadn’t done much crying, but this was the worst Nick had ever seen him, and he couldn’t quite explain the sudden sadness he felt in response to the sight. The con-man’s throat was tight and uncomfortable, and for a split second, his breathing was shaky.
“Yeah?” Nick finally responded, voice low and weak.
The boy looked tired and frail before Nick, despite the strong arms and torso that were visible beneath the younger man’s shirt. His gaze was fixed on Nick’s, and his own hands slid down to undo the knot in his coveralls. He didn’t move from the older man’s lap.
“Ellis.” Nick’s throat went dry, and his hand dropped down to stop the process of untying the kid’s coveralls.
Ellis still didn’t speak. Instead, he swatted Nick’s hand away and finished untying the knot, then slipped his fingers beneath his own shirt and, with some pained grunts, tugged it off over his head.
Nick swallowed. “Overalls-Ellis, stop…” He was never the type to turn down a good lay, but Ellis was a mess before him. He looked as if he would just collapse in on himself and his movements were lazy and exasperated, and worst of all, he was quiet.
The mechanic seemed, as usual (which the con-man should have taken as a good thing), oblivious to Nick’s remarks and attempts to stop him. The kid’s hands found the older man’s shirt (the jacket had been tossed into a corner after Ellis had worn it-Nick had no need for it on a boat) and his fingers worked the buttons open.
When Ellis reached the third button, Nick stopped him. His hand caught one of the mechanic’s wrists, and he looked sternly into the kid’s eyes.
“You need to stop.” Truth be told, there was nothing that Nick wanted more than to pull the kid down into his arms and take him right then and there, but Ellis wasn’t himself, and something about this situation just wasn’t right. Even Nick, being the person he was, sensed something wrong.
“No.” Ellis yanked his hand from Nick’s grip. For a second, he looked angry, and then he was calm, and then he was sad again, and through gritted teeth, he pleaded, “I need this. If I ain’t gonna make it, I need you to know right now-“
“Shut up.” Nick’s hands found Ellis’ face and he kissed the boy-hard. “You’re not going to die.” He kissed him again. “Stop overreacting.” He repeated the kiss, and the next thing he knew, he’d turned Ellis over and was on the kid’s mouth again.
“I’m sorry…” Ellis managed in between kisses. “I’m just…I’m scared.” His bandaged arms wrapped around the older man’s neck.
“Don’t.” Nick pulled back, using his hands to support himself, and stared down at the kid. “Stop saying that.” And then, he was stripping. His belt came off, and his pants were unbuttoned and the shirt tugged off the rest of the way. Deft fingers slid down and fixed around Ellis’ coveralls, sliding them down. The mechanic kicked them off and removed his boxers while Nick stood and finished stripping.
Ellis was a mess. He was covered in bandages and the areas that weren’t bandaged were scraped or scabbed in some way. The witch had really done a number on him.
Nick returned to Ellis and straddled the kid’s hips, rocking his own slowly-tentatively. The mechanic groaned and returned the gesture, then tugged the older man down until their foreheads made contact. Nick could feel the kid’s breathing on his lips.
A soft thudding sound caught Nick’s attention, but Ellis seemed oblivious to it. He kissed the kid’s forehead, then glanced upward, where he caught sight of Rochelle. She didn’t look all that surprised. And when looks of understanding were exchanged between the two, she turned halfway down the stairs and went right back up.
She saw this coming.
Nick glanced downward at the mechanic, who was still staring up at him. His lips were parted in a relaxed way, and the older man took advantage, drawing himself downward and kissing the kid once more, tongue slipping into the younger man’s mouth. Ellis responded with a hitch of breath, then parted his lips further, allowing more room. His hands slid up and cupped either side of Nick’s face, and he arched up into the older man.
“Ellis…” Nick sighed into the kiss and ground his hips downward to meet the younger man’s. They both groaned.
“You know what to do, Nick.” The con-man wasn’t looking at Ellis’ face when the mechanic spoke, but the longing was obvious in his voice.
“Right.” Nick bit his bottom lip and let his hand slide upward until his fingers reached the younger man’s lips. Ellis took three of the digits into his mouth and sucked lightly on them. The kid’s mouth was hot and slick against Nick’s fingers, and the older man couldn’t help but let out a noise somewhere between a groan and a sigh.
After a few seconds, the fingers slid from Ellis’ mouth and drifted down the mechanic’s bare, beaten body, leaving a trail of rapidly-cooling saliva in its wake. Nick dragged the cooling digits along the younger man’s already-hard member, then down to his entrance and gently pushed two of them inside. Ellis whimpered against the intrusion, but pushed his hips down onto the fingers regardless.
“Relax, Ellis.” Nick told him, his fingers scissoring and curving within the younger man. “Makes it easier if you relax, goddammit.” He emphasized his point by shoving his fingers further in and hunting for the boy’s prostate.
“I’m tryin’…” Ellis responded. “You try havin’ fingers shoved up yer ass.”
“You wanted this.” Nick glanced up, looking for any sign of reluctance from the younger man, but the mechanic did nothing.
“Yeah.” Ellis agreed finally. “I want this. Keep goin’, Nick.”
If Nick was in his right mind, he’d have stepped back and torn the hair from his scalp for being such a sentimental bastard, but truth be told, he felt horrible for the kid, and hell if he wasn’t just a little bit in love with the guy.
Fuck.
“Ellis. We don’t have to-“
“-Keep goin’, Nick.” Ellis repeated plainly, pushing down onto the con-man’s fingers for good measure.
“Alright.” Kisses were pressed to the younger man’s stomach as Nick prepared him. Soon, two fingers became three and Ellis was writhing and whimpering longingly. The sight was intoxicating, and Nick couldn’t resist any longer. He sat upright and used the substance from both their leaking members to slick himself up. Ellis’ hips were hoisted up until the kid’s legs were resting on Nick’s shoulders, and he finally pushed himself inside.
They shared another grin, and Nick pushed in all the way to the hilt, tossing his head back. Ellis salivated at the sight of the older man’s adam’s apple.
“Get movin’, Nick.” He pressed on, rocking his hips the best he could given his position.
Nick obeyed and pulled nearly all the way out, then pushed himself inside once more. He hissed, then repeated the process, and a rhythm started.
Ellis was quiet aside from the little sighs and groans escaping his lips. His eyes were closed and he was just going along for the ride and it was driving Nick insane.
“Tell a Keith story or something…” The con-man found himself demanding in between paced thrusts. “Christ.”
Ellis hesitated, mostly because his body was constricting and shivering with pleasure. “Doncha think...this ain’t the time for somethin’ like that?” He let out a moan afterward because Nick had hit his prostate.
“Well, say something.” The older man pleaded blandly as he sped his pace a bit. “You’re not yourself when you’re not yammering.”
“You want me to yammer?” Ellis started to laugh, but it was caught in his throat again when Nick hit that spot within him once more. The rest of it came out as another groan.
“Yeah.” Nick answered. He could feel his stomach tightening. “You and Keith ever do something like this?”
Ellis shook his head. “Naw, Keith’s straight as an arrow-at least, that’s what he tells me.” He moaned again. “But I reckon Dave ain’t so much, ‘cause he an’ I done some stuff before.”
“Stuff?” Nick thrust again, and Ellis arched upward as the pleasure wracked his body.
“Yeah-“ The younger man started. “We was drunk half the time, but there was that one time after his Momma’s funeral.”
Nick came first, and he did so with a rough thrust inward, sending Ellis over the edge with him. The talking stopped and they both rode their climax out silently, panting like dogs in summer heat, and then Nick pulled out and collapsed next to Ellis.
Ellis sighed. “I didn’t think think you liked my stories, Nick.”
The con-man shrugged. “They’re annoying as shit, but I was starting to have withdrawals.” A hand stretched out to touch Ellis’ face. “You’re supposed to be some crazy ass zombie killing machine with a million Keith stories.”
……………………………………………
That night, Rochelle, Nick, and Ellis ate supper in better spirits. Ellis sat closer to Nick than usual and Rochelle didn’t mind. The kid told stories about how Keith dove off a boat to catch a catfish in the river once and how Dave had to rescue him and Rochelle laughed. Nick ate peacefully and smiled lightly the entire time.
Yeah. They’d be okay. Ellis was in better spirits and that was all they needed. They were almost to the final stretch, and all they had to do was get to the chopper.
There would be tanks and chargers and smokers and they would try their damnedest to keep the survivors from making it, but the survivors would fight back with equal fervor, and for Coach’s sake, they’d make it. They’d reach that chopper and thank him for his blessings when they made it.
Ellis was already telling stories about it.
Author: millionminds
Chapter: 4/4
Fandom: Left 4 Dead 2
Pairing: Nick/Ellis
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Graphic sex between men, slightly OOC!Nick, OOC!Ellis, cursing, slight violence.
Disclaimer: I don't own L4D2 or anything it entails. Don't sue me.
Life really had a way of throwing shit your way sometimes. Things would be going well one moment, and then in a flash, something goes wrong and it all crumbles before you. One bad thing after the other and the next thing you know, you’re wondering if it’s even worth it anymore.
Ellis had passed out mere seconds upon reaching the boat. He’d tried to get to his feet, then stumbled forward and just collapsed, completely spent. He must’ve really been trying to make himself useful since they’d taken him along rather than abandoning him. Maybe he was just desperate not to end up like Coach. And if he went down, he’d go down fighting tooth and nail.
The mechanic woke up to Rochelle and Nick discussing something in front of him. They were crouched around a pot of noodles, and when they heard the kid stirring, they both turned on their spot to face him. Rochelle looked so relieved that Ellis could see the tears in her eyes, and Nick let out a thankful sigh. There was a small smile on his features, but nothing that surprised the mechanic too terribly much.
“How’re you holding up?” Nick questioned while Rochelle hugged Ellis gingerly, careful not to hit one of the many wounds the witch had inflicted.
Ellis waved a hand and made to sit up, letting out little grunts and whimpers as he did so. “I been better.” He answered honestly, then motioned to the pot of noodles before them. “Got enough for me in there?”
Rochelle nodded and scooped him a bowl of it, then passed it his way. “Eat up, you’re gonna need the energy.”
Ellis’ expression darkened, but he didn’t say anything. He merely started to eat his meal and didn’t say a word.
Nick noticed the change in mood. Or the lack thereof, rather. The kid seemed as brooding and contemplative as The Thinker and Nick wasn’t sure he liked that in someone like Ellis. At least he was moving enough to put food in his mouth. And then there was the whole pain factor. He probably wasn’t feeling too hot.
That in mind, the con-man reached into his pocket and pulled out a half-empty bottle of pain pills, passing it Ellis’ way.
“You look like shit, kid.”
“Thanks.” Ellis swallowed two of them, then continued on his noodles.
……………………………………………..
The next several days passed by without incident. Virgil came down to visit for a few meals, but for the most part, remained in his own cabin. Rochelle and Nick sat close to Ellis, in case something was to go wrong. They took turns going on deck for breaks. One would go up while the other sat with the kid and the other would do so when they returned. Ellis had argued that he’d be fine, but both of the other survivors seemed pretty adamant that they weren’t letting anything happen to him.
After losing Coach, it was the least they could do. They were all a little bit leary.
Rochelle had just headed off for her break, leaving Nick and Ellis behind. They both sat in the cabin, Ellis on the lone mattress and Nick leaning with his back against it in front of him. It was uncomfortably quiet, but it had been ever since the kid had awakened. His skin was pale and his eyes were sunken and tired-looking, and he seemed weaker in general.
Nick knew by now what had kept Ellis so quiet. And quite frankly, he was fed up with it. That in mind, he spoke on it.
“What stage do you figure you’re going through right now?” The con-man said, seemingly uncaring and smarmy as usual. He didn’t turn to face the younger man. “I think it’s denial right now.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Behind Nick, Ellis was clearly shocked. His jaw hung open and he sat up so abruptly that he let out a loud, pained grunt in the process.
Nick sighed, then started counting on his fingers. “Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance.” He wasn’t trying to toy with the mechanic-it was just his nature to put on his poker face when he felt it was necessary. The lump in his throat told him it was. “When you hit anger, let me know so I can go somewhere else.”
“What’re you goin’ on about, Nick?” Ellis caught on to the older man’s tone and couldn’t help but suddenly feel very afraid of what was being discussed.
“Are you really that dense?” Nick still didn’t turn to face Ellis. Instead, he hunched further over in his sitting position and lifted his knees up, letting his arms rest lazily upon them. His forearms dangled over the ground, and he was suddenly very focused on the shadows they formed upon the carpet.
“Maybe I’d get it if you actually tried to make some goddamn sense.” Ellis retorted quickly, glaring at the back of Nick’s head. “This ain’t some stupid poker game, so stop playin’ around and tell it to me straight.”
Nick’s shoulders sank, though Ellis didn’t notice. The con-man sighed, and he finally questioned after several seconds’ hesitation, “You think you’re dying, don’t you?”
Ellis went silent and sat bolt upright, eyes wide.
“I…Nick, I-“
“Don’t be a hypocrite, Ellis.” Nick hissed, and he turned on the spot, leaning a hand back to support himself as he did so. “Tell me exactly what you’re thinking.” There was a glare on the older man’s features that frightened Ellis-warned him that the man before him could see straight through him and anything other than the truth would not be tolerated. “You’re not making it very subtle if you’re trying to hide it. At least tell a goddamned Keith story or something.”
“Nick…” Ellis wondered how long the con-man had been holding back this conversation-how desperately he needed to know what other people were thinking. He wasn’t sure if he should be angry or flattered, and again, words escaped him.
“Well?”
“How long did you…?”
“Since you started sulking instead of rambling.” Nick almost repeated about just how obvious Ellis was making it, but decided against it. The mechanic looked awfully shocked sitting before him, to be honest.
And finally, Ellis gave in and let out a long sigh, reaching a tender and weak arm up to rub the back of his head. His hat rested on the ground next to the mattress.
“It’s not that I’m dyin’…” The mechanic didn’t look so sure of that phrase, but Nick let him continue, mostly out of curiosity. “It’s all the shit we done got into. I mean…we came so far and now it’s like we ain’t gonna make it much longer…”
Nick narrowed his eyes. “It’s not over, Ellis.”
Ellis shook his head, and for a brief moment, the con-man thought he saw the kid shiver. “You can keep sayin’ that, but we’re goin’ down one by one. Coach-“
“Coach died so we could keep moving, remember?”
“But I’m hurt now, and I ain’t gonna be any kinda help to y’all in this state-“
Nick’s eyes looked livid for a split second. “You’re not going to die.”
“Huh?”
“We’re not leaving you to die.” The older man’s eyes were focused so intently on Ellis’ that the kid was the first to break the eye contact. “You shot just fine when we went to get gas-“
“But you had to carry me, an’-“
“We’re almost to New Orleans.” Nick’s voice was sharp and scolding, like a mother telling her child not to say a bad word. “You’re too far to be getting all depressed.”
Ellis looked lost. His eyes grazed the mattress, then lifted up to the ceiling, then back to Nick, then repeated the process as if he wasn’t sure exactly what he was supposed to be looking at. His thoughts were jumbled and his body ached and he was physically drained, and he chose that precise moment to break right before Nick. He collapsed forward and off the mattress, arms flopping loosely around the older man’s neck and pain wracking his entire body as he did so, but he didn’t care. He let out a noise akin to a whimper and Nick reeled backward a bit, but eventually, and very awkwardly, draped an arm around the boy’s back.
“You’re not doing your injuries any good like this, Sport-“
“Shut up.” Ellis’ voice was low and intolerant, but he didn’t let go of the con-man. “Just shut up for five damn minutes.” The younger man’s hands bundled into fists around the back of Nick’s suit, and neither Ellis nor the con-man really cared. Letting out an exasperated sigh, the older man raised his other arm and pulled the mechanic closer to him. He swallowed and buried his face in Ellis’ hair.
“Thanks, Nick.” The boy finally spoke after nearly a minute of silence. “Thank you.” He repeated. “Thank you.”
The snarky remark was on the tip of Nick’s tongue, but he held it back and reminded himself, like he had done to Ellis many times before, that now was not the best time, and instead said, “What for?”
Ellis pulled away only slightly. “I…I don’t wanna die.”
Nick knew he was lying-that survival was no guarantee-, but he still said it. “You’re not. It’s going to be okay.” Besides, there was something in him that was hell-bent on making sure the three of them made it alive.
“Coach.” The younger man thought aloud, as if their former group member was right there, sitting before them. As if he was going to lift his head and acknowledge the speaking of his name. “I miss him.”
Nick didn’t say anything. Instead, he lifted one hand and let it rest on the side of Ellis’ face. He was warm, and the older man’s fingers tickled against the stubble on the kid’s chin. The digits twitched in response to the sensation, but did not pull back.
“Nick?” Ellis’ eyes were watery and red. He hadn’t done much crying, but this was the worst Nick had ever seen him, and he couldn’t quite explain the sudden sadness he felt in response to the sight. The con-man’s throat was tight and uncomfortable, and for a split second, his breathing was shaky.
“Yeah?” Nick finally responded, voice low and weak.
The boy looked tired and frail before Nick, despite the strong arms and torso that were visible beneath the younger man’s shirt. His gaze was fixed on Nick’s, and his own hands slid down to undo the knot in his coveralls. He didn’t move from the older man’s lap.
“Ellis.” Nick’s throat went dry, and his hand dropped down to stop the process of untying the kid’s coveralls.
Ellis still didn’t speak. Instead, he swatted Nick’s hand away and finished untying the knot, then slipped his fingers beneath his own shirt and, with some pained grunts, tugged it off over his head.
Nick swallowed. “Overalls-Ellis, stop…” He was never the type to turn down a good lay, but Ellis was a mess before him. He looked as if he would just collapse in on himself and his movements were lazy and exasperated, and worst of all, he was quiet.
The mechanic seemed, as usual (which the con-man should have taken as a good thing), oblivious to Nick’s remarks and attempts to stop him. The kid’s hands found the older man’s shirt (the jacket had been tossed into a corner after Ellis had worn it-Nick had no need for it on a boat) and his fingers worked the buttons open.
When Ellis reached the third button, Nick stopped him. His hand caught one of the mechanic’s wrists, and he looked sternly into the kid’s eyes.
“You need to stop.” Truth be told, there was nothing that Nick wanted more than to pull the kid down into his arms and take him right then and there, but Ellis wasn’t himself, and something about this situation just wasn’t right. Even Nick, being the person he was, sensed something wrong.
“No.” Ellis yanked his hand from Nick’s grip. For a second, he looked angry, and then he was calm, and then he was sad again, and through gritted teeth, he pleaded, “I need this. If I ain’t gonna make it, I need you to know right now-“
“Shut up.” Nick’s hands found Ellis’ face and he kissed the boy-hard. “You’re not going to die.” He kissed him again. “Stop overreacting.” He repeated the kiss, and the next thing he knew, he’d turned Ellis over and was on the kid’s mouth again.
“I’m sorry…” Ellis managed in between kisses. “I’m just…I’m scared.” His bandaged arms wrapped around the older man’s neck.
“Don’t.” Nick pulled back, using his hands to support himself, and stared down at the kid. “Stop saying that.” And then, he was stripping. His belt came off, and his pants were unbuttoned and the shirt tugged off the rest of the way. Deft fingers slid down and fixed around Ellis’ coveralls, sliding them down. The mechanic kicked them off and removed his boxers while Nick stood and finished stripping.
Ellis was a mess. He was covered in bandages and the areas that weren’t bandaged were scraped or scabbed in some way. The witch had really done a number on him.
Nick returned to Ellis and straddled the kid’s hips, rocking his own slowly-tentatively. The mechanic groaned and returned the gesture, then tugged the older man down until their foreheads made contact. Nick could feel the kid’s breathing on his lips.
A soft thudding sound caught Nick’s attention, but Ellis seemed oblivious to it. He kissed the kid’s forehead, then glanced upward, where he caught sight of Rochelle. She didn’t look all that surprised. And when looks of understanding were exchanged between the two, she turned halfway down the stairs and went right back up.
She saw this coming.
Nick glanced downward at the mechanic, who was still staring up at him. His lips were parted in a relaxed way, and the older man took advantage, drawing himself downward and kissing the kid once more, tongue slipping into the younger man’s mouth. Ellis responded with a hitch of breath, then parted his lips further, allowing more room. His hands slid up and cupped either side of Nick’s face, and he arched up into the older man.
“Ellis…” Nick sighed into the kiss and ground his hips downward to meet the younger man’s. They both groaned.
“You know what to do, Nick.” The con-man wasn’t looking at Ellis’ face when the mechanic spoke, but the longing was obvious in his voice.
“Right.” Nick bit his bottom lip and let his hand slide upward until his fingers reached the younger man’s lips. Ellis took three of the digits into his mouth and sucked lightly on them. The kid’s mouth was hot and slick against Nick’s fingers, and the older man couldn’t help but let out a noise somewhere between a groan and a sigh.
After a few seconds, the fingers slid from Ellis’ mouth and drifted down the mechanic’s bare, beaten body, leaving a trail of rapidly-cooling saliva in its wake. Nick dragged the cooling digits along the younger man’s already-hard member, then down to his entrance and gently pushed two of them inside. Ellis whimpered against the intrusion, but pushed his hips down onto the fingers regardless.
“Relax, Ellis.” Nick told him, his fingers scissoring and curving within the younger man. “Makes it easier if you relax, goddammit.” He emphasized his point by shoving his fingers further in and hunting for the boy’s prostate.
“I’m tryin’…” Ellis responded. “You try havin’ fingers shoved up yer ass.”
“You wanted this.” Nick glanced up, looking for any sign of reluctance from the younger man, but the mechanic did nothing.
“Yeah.” Ellis agreed finally. “I want this. Keep goin’, Nick.”
If Nick was in his right mind, he’d have stepped back and torn the hair from his scalp for being such a sentimental bastard, but truth be told, he felt horrible for the kid, and hell if he wasn’t just a little bit in love with the guy.
Fuck.
“Ellis. We don’t have to-“
“-Keep goin’, Nick.” Ellis repeated plainly, pushing down onto the con-man’s fingers for good measure.
“Alright.” Kisses were pressed to the younger man’s stomach as Nick prepared him. Soon, two fingers became three and Ellis was writhing and whimpering longingly. The sight was intoxicating, and Nick couldn’t resist any longer. He sat upright and used the substance from both their leaking members to slick himself up. Ellis’ hips were hoisted up until the kid’s legs were resting on Nick’s shoulders, and he finally pushed himself inside.
They shared another grin, and Nick pushed in all the way to the hilt, tossing his head back. Ellis salivated at the sight of the older man’s adam’s apple.
“Get movin’, Nick.” He pressed on, rocking his hips the best he could given his position.
Nick obeyed and pulled nearly all the way out, then pushed himself inside once more. He hissed, then repeated the process, and a rhythm started.
Ellis was quiet aside from the little sighs and groans escaping his lips. His eyes were closed and he was just going along for the ride and it was driving Nick insane.
“Tell a Keith story or something…” The con-man found himself demanding in between paced thrusts. “Christ.”
Ellis hesitated, mostly because his body was constricting and shivering with pleasure. “Doncha think...this ain’t the time for somethin’ like that?” He let out a moan afterward because Nick had hit his prostate.
“Well, say something.” The older man pleaded blandly as he sped his pace a bit. “You’re not yourself when you’re not yammering.”
“You want me to yammer?” Ellis started to laugh, but it was caught in his throat again when Nick hit that spot within him once more. The rest of it came out as another groan.
“Yeah.” Nick answered. He could feel his stomach tightening. “You and Keith ever do something like this?”
Ellis shook his head. “Naw, Keith’s straight as an arrow-at least, that’s what he tells me.” He moaned again. “But I reckon Dave ain’t so much, ‘cause he an’ I done some stuff before.”
“Stuff?” Nick thrust again, and Ellis arched upward as the pleasure wracked his body.
“Yeah-“ The younger man started. “We was drunk half the time, but there was that one time after his Momma’s funeral.”
Nick came first, and he did so with a rough thrust inward, sending Ellis over the edge with him. The talking stopped and they both rode their climax out silently, panting like dogs in summer heat, and then Nick pulled out and collapsed next to Ellis.
Ellis sighed. “I didn’t think think you liked my stories, Nick.”
The con-man shrugged. “They’re annoying as shit, but I was starting to have withdrawals.” A hand stretched out to touch Ellis’ face. “You’re supposed to be some crazy ass zombie killing machine with a million Keith stories.”
……………………………………………
That night, Rochelle, Nick, and Ellis ate supper in better spirits. Ellis sat closer to Nick than usual and Rochelle didn’t mind. The kid told stories about how Keith dove off a boat to catch a catfish in the river once and how Dave had to rescue him and Rochelle laughed. Nick ate peacefully and smiled lightly the entire time.
Yeah. They’d be okay. Ellis was in better spirits and that was all they needed. They were almost to the final stretch, and all they had to do was get to the chopper.
There would be tanks and chargers and smokers and they would try their damnedest to keep the survivors from making it, but the survivors would fight back with equal fervor, and for Coach’s sake, they’d make it. They’d reach that chopper and thank him for his blessings when they made it.
Ellis was already telling stories about it.