Log: Things In Common
Who: K'del, Milani
When: It is a winter afternoon, 15:12 of day 26, month 2, turn 35 of Interval 10.
Where:Snowasis, High Reaches Weyr
What: Even after all these turns, growing older, wiser and calmer, Milani and K'del still have a lot in common.
Snowasis, High Reaches Weyr(#555RJ)
The Snowasis is rarely quiet, and even then, the high-ceilinged former weyr is kept from echoing by the fantastical booths tucked into its convoluted perimeter. The secluded seating spaces have been shaped from the truncated stalagmites that escaped the smoothing of the main floor, and are both softened and separated by colorful hangings that are thick and opaque enough to make each corner its own private nook.
Some of the smaller stalactites still roam the ceiling, their jagged teeth tracing a bumpy, inverted spine to the hearth. There, a thick rug with a low klah table and comfortable armchairs and couches sit, their upholstery and cushions changed sporadically to match the season: bright, light colors in the summer, fresh greens and yellows in the spring, warm autumnals in fall, and clear, rich hues for winter. Small tables litter the rest of the cavern, enough to fit up to four people each, while stools stand along the smooth wooden bar behind which is the passthrough window to the kitchen. Glass-paneled cabinetry behind the bar provides a clear view of the available liquors, the many colors reflecting the soft light of glows tucked into strategic niches around the cavern.
>---< Local Weather for HRW >------------------------------------------------<
Current Temp: 39 F Today's Lo/Hi: 34 F / 49 F
Belior: waning crescent Timor: waxing gibbous
Weather: blizzard
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Wind and snow make for very bad weather today. The visibility is low,
making travel dangerous.
>-----------------------------------< 15:12 D26 M2 T35, winter afternoon >---<
It's typical Reaches winter weather out there which means that even at this hour, the Snowasis is a little more crowded than usual, though it hasn't hit peak post-work capacity yet. There's a cluster of barely-old-enough-to-really-drink youngsters up at the bar proper, several of the nooks are occupied if the low hum of voices is any indication and several of the tables are occupied as well. The couch by the hearth currently holds one occupant: Milani, who is very clearly NOT working. No abacus, no clipboard, no sheets of paper, just a pencil forgotten in the thick braids coiled atop her head. She is however, reading and a mug stands on the nearest side table to her. A Snowasis worker pauses near her and asks her about a refill: "No thank you, I'll just finish this up first."
K'del - who has managed to go outdoors without a hat (again) - shakes snow out of his hair as he enters from the ledge, rubbing gingerly at his ears as he does so. That chill has him keeping his coat on as he makes his way to the bar to collect a mug, those youngsters given only a passing glance. "No," he says to a passing query from the bartender. "Just taking a breather. Cheers." Mug in hand, he turns, blue-eyed gaze sweeping the room for several seconds before it alights upon Milani. "Millie," he says, as he approaches, clearly aiming to perch himself upon the couch's armrest. "Working hard, I see."
The armrest is availably, though Milani shifts her elbow a titch to make room. The Weyrleader's voice brings her gaze upward and a warm, fond smile curls the corners of her mouth. "Kas," she greets him and gives her book a little waggle. "I'm improving my mind," she claims and slips a finger between the pages, lets the pages fall shut around it and perches the volume on her thigh. "Though it's arguable whether or not the adventures of a wandering harper are truly educational or just entertainment." A little pause as she scans his face. "How are you?"
"For you," decides K'del, the glimmer of a grin visible about the corners of his mouth, "definitely educational. If it were Nik, and there was homework still to be done..." Double standards are alive and well. He adjusts his mug, half-balancing it upon his knee, fingers wrapped closely around the rim. "I'm good. Trying to work out whether having a reason to be down south on a regular basis is a good thing or not, given how much colder it feels when I get home." His smile, though, is indulgent: he's not really complaining. "Cadejoth's always glad to be back, though, especially with the eggs and all. How're you?"
Laughter answers double standards. "At least I can vouch for there being something new to be learned for him in this particular book, though not in some I've read most recently." The assistant headwoman leans back against the couch back, listening. "Funny how that works, isn't it? When you're somewhere cool, the warmer place also seems that much warmer." Milani reaches for her own mug, leaning forward and to the side to fetch it and takes a drink. "Are you glad to be back too?" A little look tilted up sideways at him. "And I'm well - busy, but not too busy."
K'del's got a laugh of his own for that first comment, though his expression turns more reflective as Milani continues. "Mm," he agrees. "I'm always glad to be back. High Reaches is home, no matter how much I appreciate my time spent with Ali and the kids... no matter how difficult it is to leave them, or to take Iska way from them. It's not just duty that keeps me here." He lifts his own mug, now, though it's mostly to inhale the steam from it as he nods. "Good. Best way to be, I think."
"I'm glad for that, though ... being torn that way, it's hard," Milani remarks as thoughtfully, tone gentle. "Though maybe it might be easier if it were just duty. Less tugging here," she gives her sternum a little tap, right above the heart and the corner of her mouth quirks up, a touch wry. That broadens out into an honest smile though. "Agreed. Too much and you're going crazy, too little and ... well the same."
Slowly, carefully, K'del nods. "It's... sure, with dragons we can be anywhere we want within a few seconds, but it's not quite the same as just ''being'' there. Though you may be right on the duty. The heart just complicates things." He's got his own wryness for that, in the glance he aims back at Milani, though he, too, turns it back to something more cheerful quickly. "Exactly so. Should warn you: Kasey's been at me to let him and Nik Stand, even though eleven," beat, "all right, eleven and a half, is clearly far too young. Don't know if it'll come back to you, but... just in case."
"No, it isn't. Long distance just -- sucks," Milani falls back on that word with a little laugh, merriment crinkling up the corners of her eyes. His next sees her drawing a breath and puffing out her cheeks. "Mmmm. Has Nik said anything to you about it? He hasn't mentioned it to me yet, but you know how kids are when there's eggs about - a little dragon crazy. She drums her fingers against the side of her mug. "Milandra didn't ask. She told me that she's going to, whether I like to or not, or she'll run away with her father's family caravan. Go figure right?"
K'del raises his mug in silent toast: yes, it sucks. What's more to be said about it? As for their son, he shakes his head. "No. Not sure if he's just letting Kasey talk for him, or if Kasey is just taking it on himself. Guess I'd've been the same, though, if I'd grown up here: it's got to be tough, not ''really'' being old enough, but being so excited by the possibility." A moment later, his gaze dropping towards his mug, he adds, "That sounds like Milandra. Shells, though: it's hard to believe she really ''is'' old enough. Where'd the turns go, Millie?"
\
"I'll keep my ears open, just in case. And if he does ask, I'll gently remind him about the age requirements and that we're not comfortable with it until he's at least ... 13? 14?" Milani looks up at K'del questioningly, then chuckles: "She's an awful lot like me, isn't she. I wish she'd inherited a little bit of Mik's more laid-back attitude, but what can you do?" One shoulder lifts, drops again, gaze going to the fire dancing on the hearth. "Seems just yesterday we were around her age, doesn't it? But everyone grows up, changes." One of her hands frees itself from her mug, reaches for his to offer a little squeeze.
"Thirteen, at least," confirms K'del; of this much, at least, he's sure. "Given Iesaryth's probably liable to rise in the next few months, and it's a good two to three turns between flights, unless things change dramatically, he'll be roughly an appropriate age by Hraedhyth's next. And probably, by then, better equipped to figure out if it's actually what he wants." His mug is returned to his knee, balanced there carefully as he adds, "She's her own self. ''Could'' call it payback: your parents had to put up with you, and now it's your turn." It's teasing; lighthearted. His fingers return Milani's squeeze, just gently. "Mm. And it's not that I miss being that age. Not unhappy being over thirty. It's just... strange, sometimes."
"Exactly," Milani agrees. "I think it's important to go into it whole-hearted. I've seen and heard too many candidates and weyrlings over the turns with regrets," she muses with a little wrinkle of her brow that smooths out quickly enough when she laughs again. "Ye-es. That's it. Payback and well deserved," the assistant headwoman agrees, amused. Her hand withdraws post-squeeze. "I don't either. Miss that age. Even at fifteen and sixteen and seventeen and eighteen I was doing too many stupid things," she admits with a laugh. "It's a little odd being considered 'older and wiser' and having people look up to me. I don't remember when that changed either, going from the one who always had questions and heartaches to the one answering the questions and providing comforting words for the aches."
K'del admits, as his fingers wrap back around his mug, "Pretty sure I had no idea what I was getting in to at fifteen, even. But much better than ''eleven'' would've been. Want all my kids to be making decisions based on what they really want, and not... what feels exciting in the moment." He drops his gaze to his mug, considering it with cheerful thoughtfulness, and then sets the mug down on a conveniently located table. "Was just commenting the other night to someone that, shells, I understand how frustrating and awful it must've been for people, when I first became Weyrleader. Not that I didn't get it, even, then, but now... you look back and it's just such a strange thing. In a way, I'm glad I spent so long as not Weyrleader: feels like, this time, I'm here as an adult from the start. Clean slate, you know?"
"Not what feels exciting at the moment. Words I thought I'd never hear coming from you," Milani teases lightly, a hint of mischief dancing in her eyes and she aims a little knuckle-poke at the side of his leg, meant fondly. "Yes. I understand so much better now, why some people used to get so angry, frustrated and sometimes downright mean to me, when I find myself trying to get some of the younger assistants to see some sense and it's like beating my head against the walls. Though I think the mean was probably still uncalled for." She's clearly thinking back to something specific, but tilts a look upward once more. "Clean slate. That must feel a lot better, hm? Than being thrown into the middle of things? And I think the break did you good."
The tease makes K'del grin - and the poke, too. He sticks out his tongue, utterly mature. "Mmm," he agrees. "The mean was definitely uncalled for. But it's easier to understand some of it, now. Do you miss being Headwoman, now?" The question is thoughtful, and carries a note of surprise to it, as though he's just realised that he's never asked this... and perhaps should have. "Much better. It... did. The circumstances of it all were hardly ideal, of course, but... I'm much better for it. Happier. Hopeful that, with Azaylia, I can build some kind of close, solid working relationship, better than what I've had in the past."
Now there's a doozy of a question and the lightheartedness of Milani's expression dims as she looks away. She doesn't answer right away, commenting on his situation instead: "I wouldn't wish those circumstances on anyone," the headwoman's assistant says softly. "Not even Tiriana." Her nose wrinkles and she gives a little shake of her head, like shaking off shades of the past. "I am /very/ glad of that and hope the same. Honestly, I think you deserve to have /that/ kind of Weyrleadership, where it's a partnership with your Weyrwoman." Firm in that belief, she is, it seems. She's silent for the space of a sip from her mug, the book sliding down off her leg and coming to rest between it and the side of the couch. "As for being Headwoman -- it was my ambition for so long and when it came my way, I don't think I was entirely ready for it, but losing it, especially in the way I did, cut deeply." Bare honesty. "Yes, I miss it. But I'm mostly content with how things have worked out. At this point, if I were truly ambitious for that knot again, I'd have to seek it outside the Weyr, because I don't want to take anything from Giorda. And leaving the Weyr again isn't something I'm prepared to do."
Mention of Tiriana has K'del's own expression twisting, though it's a careful thing, much more subtle than it might have been a few turns ago. He inhales as Milani talks, letting the breath whistle through his teeth in a thoughtful way; as she finishes, he nods, just once. "It's something we both have in common," he supposes, in the end. "Neither of us was really ready for what we got, ambition or no ambition. And the circumstances of losing it..." He trails off, shaking his head as if to clear his thoughts. "Glad you're content, though. And I understand completely about not leaving High Reaches: home is home." He exhales again, this time more softly. "Still half expect to see you behind the desk in Giorda's office, even after all this time. It's strange."
Even more subtle, Milani catches that and briefly her hand ghosts over, just a press of fingers offering sympathetic understanding for the T-word. "There's a reason we've always gotten along," she reaches for humor and lightheartedness again. "Plenty in common. Makes for good friendships." And this time she beams a smile up at him, more akin to ones of yore. "Home is home. Just don't ever mix Giorda and I up, that could be embarrassing considering some of the usage that desk once got put to," she quips with some of her old sass. "Who knows where the path will lead next. Giorda could meet the love of her life who's a trader and run off with him. But I'm not holding my breath. Things are as they are and it's good work that I'm good at and do well. I like being part of the team and making home, home."
The silent tip of K'del's head acknowledges Milani's gesture, accompanied by the twist of his mouth, just barely visible. Seriousness, however, is not long for his expression: it's a good thing he has abandoned his klah, because if he'd been halfway through a sip at that mention of the desk... well. It could've been messy. As it is, he can do nothing less than ''laugh''. "Shells. Don't I remember. We had some good times." For the rest, he nods: "I'm glad. It's a good attitude. Won't say it's one I managed all that well, when it was me. Guess it helps you've a useful position as part of the team; which I'm glad for." It's a moment later, as he reaches to reclaim his mug, that he adds, "Glad you and I managed to stay friends."
Milani can't help but grin sunnily, all eyes wide and 'innocent' in the face of that laughter of K'del's. She joins in after a moment, merrily. "Yes, we did," she agrees when laughter has given way to a long deep breath. "I don't do well without useful work to do. Too much energy, that's always been true." At his last, her head tips to the side, aims to rest against whatever lines up best - probably his elbow. "Couldn't be any other way," Milani concludes, lightly enough, though there's firmness in her tone beneath that. Like, come hell or high water, she'd have it that way and no other. "There are some friends that are too good to lose, no matter what."
K'del grins down at Milani as she leans against him: this time, he's the one reaching to give her hand a squeeze. "You'll slow down when your dead and not before," he opines, still grinning. "Can't imagine you any other way." Almost can't. No doubt he's deliberately ignoring that awful time after Nikalas' birth. "You're right, anyway: really ''couldn't'' be any other way. Friends forever, just without the friendship bracelets or whatever the pre-teen girls swear by."
"Most likely," Milani agrees and returns the finger-squeeze, before straightening back up. "As for friendship bracelets, I'm sure I could get Milandra to make a few, or teach me how to make one, and then we can each have one in matching colors and complementary patterns and make all of those pre-teen girls terribly jealous," she jokes. She rarely-to-never talks about that time after Nik's birth except in oblique terms, especially 'in public'.
K'del hides his smile in his mug, though it's probably not quite deliberate - more coincidence. Said mug gets set down again, now nudged well away from the edge of the table as if to formally abandon it, as he says, "I'm sure they would be just ''beautiful''." His mouth twitches. "So glad it'll be a long time before I have pre-teen girls to parent," he concludes, shaking his head. "Not sure I'd even know where to start. "
"The best /evar/," Milani echoes with the exaggerated tones of some girls that age, she dimples a grin up at him. "You'll manage when the time comes. Besides, every girl is different. Some of them come with more attitude than others. Just remember that more often than not, you don't actually have to say anything. Just listen, hug if it seems right and just get out of the way if whatever issue is looking well and truly /bad/." Deadpan.
K'del bites back actual laughter at that first remark, his expression turning more thoughtful for the rest... right up until that ''last'' remark. "And then I pass them back to their mothers," he concludes, with a twitching smile. "That's what moms are for, right?" Now, however, he reluctantly slides his feet back to the ground, making as if to stand. "Guess I ought to get back to it, stop interrupting your... what was it, mind improvement?"
"That works too," Milani replies laughingly. "Depending on the mother." Light. Her smile tipped up at him as he rises, is warm, expression fond. "Improvement, definitely not entertainment," the assistant headwoman continues humorously. "But don't hesitate to interrupt, I don't mind if it's you." Sincere and still lighthearted. "Just don't freeze on your way across the Bowl, okay?" And she roots around in the couch to find her book wherever it's slipped off to.
K'del turns his gaze towards the door, as if only now remembering the weather outside; his nose wrinkles. But, "Rather stay and interrupt you, but there's work to be done. Do my best not to freeze, anyway. Have a good one, Millie." For now-- it's back across to the exit, and out into the cold. Brr.
When: It is a winter afternoon, 15:12 of day 26, month 2, turn 35 of Interval 10.
Where:Snowasis, High Reaches Weyr
What: Even after all these turns, growing older, wiser and calmer, Milani and K'del still have a lot in common.
Snowasis, High Reaches Weyr(#555RJ)
The Snowasis is rarely quiet, and even then, the high-ceilinged former weyr is kept from echoing by the fantastical booths tucked into its convoluted perimeter. The secluded seating spaces have been shaped from the truncated stalagmites that escaped the smoothing of the main floor, and are both softened and separated by colorful hangings that are thick and opaque enough to make each corner its own private nook.
Some of the smaller stalactites still roam the ceiling, their jagged teeth tracing a bumpy, inverted spine to the hearth. There, a thick rug with a low klah table and comfortable armchairs and couches sit, their upholstery and cushions changed sporadically to match the season: bright, light colors in the summer, fresh greens and yellows in the spring, warm autumnals in fall, and clear, rich hues for winter. Small tables litter the rest of the cavern, enough to fit up to four people each, while stools stand along the smooth wooden bar behind which is the passthrough window to the kitchen. Glass-paneled cabinetry behind the bar provides a clear view of the available liquors, the many colors reflecting the soft light of glows tucked into strategic niches around the cavern.
>---< Local Weather for HRW >------------------------------------------------<
Current Temp: 39 F Today's Lo/Hi: 34 F / 49 F
Belior: waning crescent Timor: waxing gibbous
Weather: blizzard
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Wind and snow make for very bad weather today. The visibility is low,
making travel dangerous.
>-----------------------------------< 15:12 D26 M2 T35, winter afternoon >---<
It's typical Reaches winter weather out there which means that even at this hour, the Snowasis is a little more crowded than usual, though it hasn't hit peak post-work capacity yet. There's a cluster of barely-old-enough-to-really-drink youngsters up at the bar proper, several of the nooks are occupied if the low hum of voices is any indication and several of the tables are occupied as well. The couch by the hearth currently holds one occupant: Milani, who is very clearly NOT working. No abacus, no clipboard, no sheets of paper, just a pencil forgotten in the thick braids coiled atop her head. She is however, reading and a mug stands on the nearest side table to her. A Snowasis worker pauses near her and asks her about a refill: "No thank you, I'll just finish this up first."
K'del - who has managed to go outdoors without a hat (again) - shakes snow out of his hair as he enters from the ledge, rubbing gingerly at his ears as he does so. That chill has him keeping his coat on as he makes his way to the bar to collect a mug, those youngsters given only a passing glance. "No," he says to a passing query from the bartender. "Just taking a breather. Cheers." Mug in hand, he turns, blue-eyed gaze sweeping the room for several seconds before it alights upon Milani. "Millie," he says, as he approaches, clearly aiming to perch himself upon the couch's armrest. "Working hard, I see."
The armrest is availably, though Milani shifts her elbow a titch to make room. The Weyrleader's voice brings her gaze upward and a warm, fond smile curls the corners of her mouth. "Kas," she greets him and gives her book a little waggle. "I'm improving my mind," she claims and slips a finger between the pages, lets the pages fall shut around it and perches the volume on her thigh. "Though it's arguable whether or not the adventures of a wandering harper are truly educational or just entertainment." A little pause as she scans his face. "How are you?"
"For you," decides K'del, the glimmer of a grin visible about the corners of his mouth, "definitely educational. If it were Nik, and there was homework still to be done..." Double standards are alive and well. He adjusts his mug, half-balancing it upon his knee, fingers wrapped closely around the rim. "I'm good. Trying to work out whether having a reason to be down south on a regular basis is a good thing or not, given how much colder it feels when I get home." His smile, though, is indulgent: he's not really complaining. "Cadejoth's always glad to be back, though, especially with the eggs and all. How're you?"
Laughter answers double standards. "At least I can vouch for there being something new to be learned for him in this particular book, though not in some I've read most recently." The assistant headwoman leans back against the couch back, listening. "Funny how that works, isn't it? When you're somewhere cool, the warmer place also seems that much warmer." Milani reaches for her own mug, leaning forward and to the side to fetch it and takes a drink. "Are you glad to be back too?" A little look tilted up sideways at him. "And I'm well - busy, but not too busy."
K'del's got a laugh of his own for that first comment, though his expression turns more reflective as Milani continues. "Mm," he agrees. "I'm always glad to be back. High Reaches is home, no matter how much I appreciate my time spent with Ali and the kids... no matter how difficult it is to leave them, or to take Iska way from them. It's not just duty that keeps me here." He lifts his own mug, now, though it's mostly to inhale the steam from it as he nods. "Good. Best way to be, I think."
"I'm glad for that, though ... being torn that way, it's hard," Milani remarks as thoughtfully, tone gentle. "Though maybe it might be easier if it were just duty. Less tugging here," she gives her sternum a little tap, right above the heart and the corner of her mouth quirks up, a touch wry. That broadens out into an honest smile though. "Agreed. Too much and you're going crazy, too little and ... well the same."
Slowly, carefully, K'del nods. "It's... sure, with dragons we can be anywhere we want within a few seconds, but it's not quite the same as just ''being'' there. Though you may be right on the duty. The heart just complicates things." He's got his own wryness for that, in the glance he aims back at Milani, though he, too, turns it back to something more cheerful quickly. "Exactly so. Should warn you: Kasey's been at me to let him and Nik Stand, even though eleven," beat, "all right, eleven and a half, is clearly far too young. Don't know if it'll come back to you, but... just in case."
"No, it isn't. Long distance just -- sucks," Milani falls back on that word with a little laugh, merriment crinkling up the corners of her eyes. His next sees her drawing a breath and puffing out her cheeks. "Mmmm. Has Nik said anything to you about it? He hasn't mentioned it to me yet, but you know how kids are when there's eggs about - a little dragon crazy. She drums her fingers against the side of her mug. "Milandra didn't ask. She told me that she's going to, whether I like to or not, or she'll run away with her father's family caravan. Go figure right?"
K'del raises his mug in silent toast: yes, it sucks. What's more to be said about it? As for their son, he shakes his head. "No. Not sure if he's just letting Kasey talk for him, or if Kasey is just taking it on himself. Guess I'd've been the same, though, if I'd grown up here: it's got to be tough, not ''really'' being old enough, but being so excited by the possibility." A moment later, his gaze dropping towards his mug, he adds, "That sounds like Milandra. Shells, though: it's hard to believe she really ''is'' old enough. Where'd the turns go, Millie?"
\
"I'll keep my ears open, just in case. And if he does ask, I'll gently remind him about the age requirements and that we're not comfortable with it until he's at least ... 13? 14?" Milani looks up at K'del questioningly, then chuckles: "She's an awful lot like me, isn't she. I wish she'd inherited a little bit of Mik's more laid-back attitude, but what can you do?" One shoulder lifts, drops again, gaze going to the fire dancing on the hearth. "Seems just yesterday we were around her age, doesn't it? But everyone grows up, changes." One of her hands frees itself from her mug, reaches for his to offer a little squeeze.
"Thirteen, at least," confirms K'del; of this much, at least, he's sure. "Given Iesaryth's probably liable to rise in the next few months, and it's a good two to three turns between flights, unless things change dramatically, he'll be roughly an appropriate age by Hraedhyth's next. And probably, by then, better equipped to figure out if it's actually what he wants." His mug is returned to his knee, balanced there carefully as he adds, "She's her own self. ''Could'' call it payback: your parents had to put up with you, and now it's your turn." It's teasing; lighthearted. His fingers return Milani's squeeze, just gently. "Mm. And it's not that I miss being that age. Not unhappy being over thirty. It's just... strange, sometimes."
"Exactly," Milani agrees. "I think it's important to go into it whole-hearted. I've seen and heard too many candidates and weyrlings over the turns with regrets," she muses with a little wrinkle of her brow that smooths out quickly enough when she laughs again. "Ye-es. That's it. Payback and well deserved," the assistant headwoman agrees, amused. Her hand withdraws post-squeeze. "I don't either. Miss that age. Even at fifteen and sixteen and seventeen and eighteen I was doing too many stupid things," she admits with a laugh. "It's a little odd being considered 'older and wiser' and having people look up to me. I don't remember when that changed either, going from the one who always had questions and heartaches to the one answering the questions and providing comforting words for the aches."
K'del admits, as his fingers wrap back around his mug, "Pretty sure I had no idea what I was getting in to at fifteen, even. But much better than ''eleven'' would've been. Want all my kids to be making decisions based on what they really want, and not... what feels exciting in the moment." He drops his gaze to his mug, considering it with cheerful thoughtfulness, and then sets the mug down on a conveniently located table. "Was just commenting the other night to someone that, shells, I understand how frustrating and awful it must've been for people, when I first became Weyrleader. Not that I didn't get it, even, then, but now... you look back and it's just such a strange thing. In a way, I'm glad I spent so long as not Weyrleader: feels like, this time, I'm here as an adult from the start. Clean slate, you know?"
"Not what feels exciting at the moment. Words I thought I'd never hear coming from you," Milani teases lightly, a hint of mischief dancing in her eyes and she aims a little knuckle-poke at the side of his leg, meant fondly. "Yes. I understand so much better now, why some people used to get so angry, frustrated and sometimes downright mean to me, when I find myself trying to get some of the younger assistants to see some sense and it's like beating my head against the walls. Though I think the mean was probably still uncalled for." She's clearly thinking back to something specific, but tilts a look upward once more. "Clean slate. That must feel a lot better, hm? Than being thrown into the middle of things? And I think the break did you good."
The tease makes K'del grin - and the poke, too. He sticks out his tongue, utterly mature. "Mmm," he agrees. "The mean was definitely uncalled for. But it's easier to understand some of it, now. Do you miss being Headwoman, now?" The question is thoughtful, and carries a note of surprise to it, as though he's just realised that he's never asked this... and perhaps should have. "Much better. It... did. The circumstances of it all were hardly ideal, of course, but... I'm much better for it. Happier. Hopeful that, with Azaylia, I can build some kind of close, solid working relationship, better than what I've had in the past."
Now there's a doozy of a question and the lightheartedness of Milani's expression dims as she looks away. She doesn't answer right away, commenting on his situation instead: "I wouldn't wish those circumstances on anyone," the headwoman's assistant says softly. "Not even Tiriana." Her nose wrinkles and she gives a little shake of her head, like shaking off shades of the past. "I am /very/ glad of that and hope the same. Honestly, I think you deserve to have /that/ kind of Weyrleadership, where it's a partnership with your Weyrwoman." Firm in that belief, she is, it seems. She's silent for the space of a sip from her mug, the book sliding down off her leg and coming to rest between it and the side of the couch. "As for being Headwoman -- it was my ambition for so long and when it came my way, I don't think I was entirely ready for it, but losing it, especially in the way I did, cut deeply." Bare honesty. "Yes, I miss it. But I'm mostly content with how things have worked out. At this point, if I were truly ambitious for that knot again, I'd have to seek it outside the Weyr, because I don't want to take anything from Giorda. And leaving the Weyr again isn't something I'm prepared to do."
Mention of Tiriana has K'del's own expression twisting, though it's a careful thing, much more subtle than it might have been a few turns ago. He inhales as Milani talks, letting the breath whistle through his teeth in a thoughtful way; as she finishes, he nods, just once. "It's something we both have in common," he supposes, in the end. "Neither of us was really ready for what we got, ambition or no ambition. And the circumstances of losing it..." He trails off, shaking his head as if to clear his thoughts. "Glad you're content, though. And I understand completely about not leaving High Reaches: home is home." He exhales again, this time more softly. "Still half expect to see you behind the desk in Giorda's office, even after all this time. It's strange."
Even more subtle, Milani catches that and briefly her hand ghosts over, just a press of fingers offering sympathetic understanding for the T-word. "There's a reason we've always gotten along," she reaches for humor and lightheartedness again. "Plenty in common. Makes for good friendships." And this time she beams a smile up at him, more akin to ones of yore. "Home is home. Just don't ever mix Giorda and I up, that could be embarrassing considering some of the usage that desk once got put to," she quips with some of her old sass. "Who knows where the path will lead next. Giorda could meet the love of her life who's a trader and run off with him. But I'm not holding my breath. Things are as they are and it's good work that I'm good at and do well. I like being part of the team and making home, home."
The silent tip of K'del's head acknowledges Milani's gesture, accompanied by the twist of his mouth, just barely visible. Seriousness, however, is not long for his expression: it's a good thing he has abandoned his klah, because if he'd been halfway through a sip at that mention of the desk... well. It could've been messy. As it is, he can do nothing less than ''laugh''. "Shells. Don't I remember. We had some good times." For the rest, he nods: "I'm glad. It's a good attitude. Won't say it's one I managed all that well, when it was me. Guess it helps you've a useful position as part of the team; which I'm glad for." It's a moment later, as he reaches to reclaim his mug, that he adds, "Glad you and I managed to stay friends."
Milani can't help but grin sunnily, all eyes wide and 'innocent' in the face of that laughter of K'del's. She joins in after a moment, merrily. "Yes, we did," she agrees when laughter has given way to a long deep breath. "I don't do well without useful work to do. Too much energy, that's always been true." At his last, her head tips to the side, aims to rest against whatever lines up best - probably his elbow. "Couldn't be any other way," Milani concludes, lightly enough, though there's firmness in her tone beneath that. Like, come hell or high water, she'd have it that way and no other. "There are some friends that are too good to lose, no matter what."
K'del grins down at Milani as she leans against him: this time, he's the one reaching to give her hand a squeeze. "You'll slow down when your dead and not before," he opines, still grinning. "Can't imagine you any other way." Almost can't. No doubt he's deliberately ignoring that awful time after Nikalas' birth. "You're right, anyway: really ''couldn't'' be any other way. Friends forever, just without the friendship bracelets or whatever the pre-teen girls swear by."
"Most likely," Milani agrees and returns the finger-squeeze, before straightening back up. "As for friendship bracelets, I'm sure I could get Milandra to make a few, or teach me how to make one, and then we can each have one in matching colors and complementary patterns and make all of those pre-teen girls terribly jealous," she jokes. She rarely-to-never talks about that time after Nik's birth except in oblique terms, especially 'in public'.
K'del hides his smile in his mug, though it's probably not quite deliberate - more coincidence. Said mug gets set down again, now nudged well away from the edge of the table as if to formally abandon it, as he says, "I'm sure they would be just ''beautiful''." His mouth twitches. "So glad it'll be a long time before I have pre-teen girls to parent," he concludes, shaking his head. "Not sure I'd even know where to start. "
"The best /evar/," Milani echoes with the exaggerated tones of some girls that age, she dimples a grin up at him. "You'll manage when the time comes. Besides, every girl is different. Some of them come with more attitude than others. Just remember that more often than not, you don't actually have to say anything. Just listen, hug if it seems right and just get out of the way if whatever issue is looking well and truly /bad/." Deadpan.
K'del bites back actual laughter at that first remark, his expression turning more thoughtful for the rest... right up until that ''last'' remark. "And then I pass them back to their mothers," he concludes, with a twitching smile. "That's what moms are for, right?" Now, however, he reluctantly slides his feet back to the ground, making as if to stand. "Guess I ought to get back to it, stop interrupting your... what was it, mind improvement?"
"That works too," Milani replies laughingly. "Depending on the mother." Light. Her smile tipped up at him as he rises, is warm, expression fond. "Improvement, definitely not entertainment," the assistant headwoman continues humorously. "But don't hesitate to interrupt, I don't mind if it's you." Sincere and still lighthearted. "Just don't freeze on your way across the Bowl, okay?" And she roots around in the couch to find her book wherever it's slipped off to.
K'del turns his gaze towards the door, as if only now remembering the weather outside; his nose wrinkles. But, "Rather stay and interrupt you, but there's work to be done. Do my best not to freeze, anyway. Have a good one, Millie." For now-- it's back across to the exit, and out into the cold. Brr.