Adventures of a Crossdressing Knight [12/30]
Title: Unsex Me Here
Author: Miki-hime
Rating: T, may change to M if I feel up to it.
Characters/Pairing: Arthur/Gwen, Gwen/Lancelot (in the beginning), Merlin/Freya, Merlin/Morgana?
Word Count: 80,469 (Total)
Genre: AU, Adventure, Romance
Disclaimer: This is purely for fun, not for profit. Don't sue me, it's a waste of your time.
Summary: For Gwen, being a girl was hard enough. Being a girl pretending to be a man to get enlisted into the army? Impossible.
Author's Note: I've decided to make this 30 chapters instead of 40 because I don't want the story to drag on too long. I'm aiming for 120,000 words. If inspiration really hits, and soon, I'll make it 40 chapters. Any comment or review you can offer is greatly appreciated!
Unsex Me Here
The odd wave of euphoria started to wear off once Arthur returned to his room. He lay on the bed and sighed as he looked at the ceiling and a slew of thoughts flowed through his mind.
Gwyn was the scrawniest, prettiest boy he'd probably ever seen, but he was still a man when it came down to it.
He didn't really know how to explain how he felt. It was a nice feeling knowing that he cared for someone who cared for him back. It was also nice knowing he had someone to kiss whenever he felt like it.
What scared him more than anything that he was having these feelings for a man. He was the crowned prince, future king of Camelot. He was fully expected to produce an heir. It was just another duty he was expected to fill. This thing between them wasn't going to last. It was completely irrational.
For some reason, whenever he was around the other prince, all such thought flew out the window. His heart would constrict, almost painfully. His pulse would race. Sometimes he felt like he would simply overflow.
It was strange. Ever since they'd returned from that strange world, he found himself forgetting that Gwyn was even a man. He'd heard of knights who'd lost their limbs, who could still remember the feeling of having a hand or a foot. When they kissed, it was if he could feel the curve of breasts under his shirt, or the heat of a female core through his training pants.
Though delusions made it easier for him to kiss him, to touch him, and to let the other prince touch him, it made Arthur wonder if he was crazy. Their recent encounter made him realize that he couldn't imagine the idea of … performing the same act on Gwyn. Even so, the attraction he felt towards him.
It just didn't make any sense!
There was a soft knock on the door.
"Come in," Arthur said, sighing.
"Merlin has just left, my lord, " said a soft, womanly voice. "He asked me to finish your laundry."
"Typical Merlin." Arthur rolled his eyes. "Just… just set them down anywhere."
Arthur sat up and watched as the servant bent down and dropped the basket in the corner. He noticed the soft curve of her hips under her soft green dress and the way her dress clung to her slim waist.
"Come here," he said.
The woman, Elaine, turned around to look at him. She was a beautiful woman, blonde, with a heart-shaped face and strawberry lips.
"My lord?"
He patted the spot next to him on the bed and slowly, hesitantly, she sat down beside him.
He pulled at the bow at the back of her corset, watching in awe as her entire dress began to fall apart, revealing the creamy skin beneath.
She gasped, but he ignored her. It'd been so long since he'd fooled around with one of he servant girls. He expected the sound to rile him, but he felt nothing.
He pulled the clip out of her hair and watched her hair fall down her back in waves. Her dress was hanging off her shoulders. All he had to do was pull it off her shoulders.
He reached out a hand towards her shoulder and ran his hand down the curve of her arm.
"There is one person I know I can trust. One person that I know would never betray me. You are that person. "
He dropped his hand.
"Go." He managed to choke out. "Leave me."
She nodded, holding her dress tightly against her chest, and running from the room as fast as her legs could carry her.
He watched her go, feeling the dread and shame pool deep within his stomach. What on Earth had possessed him to do such a thing? He'd only been joking when he mentioned Elaine. He had never planned to…
Arthur flopped back onto his bed, burying his head into his pillow. He was certain he didn't like men, yet Gwyn had a hold on him somehow.
Another knock.
"Come in."
"The king requests your presence in the war room, sire," the knight announced. "He said it's urgent."
"Urgent," Arthur repeated, standing up quickly. "Did he say anything else, Leon?"
"Yes, sire," Leon said. "There has been a sighting of elves in the forest. Their barrier has apparently been weakened. Your father says this may be our only chance to finally defeat them"
Arthur felt his heart drop into his stomach. He jumped off the bed, grabbing his sword.
"Let's go."
Elaine Astolot was a woman of virtue. She was beautiful, desired by many, but she had never even kissed a man, let alone slept with one.
So when Prince Arthur practically disrobed her, she was taken by surprise. Her friends would call her lucky to have caught the eye of the prince, but she felt dirty after the encounter. She shuddered to think of what would have happened if he hadn't stopped.
She was in so much distress as she ran from his room that her body collided with another and she fell to the ground.
She crossed her hands protectively over her chest as she fell, lest her dress fall of completely.
"Are you alright?"
Elaine looked up into the eyes of Lancelot, Prince Gwyddno's impossibly handsome manservant.
"Here." He pulled her to her feet, looking concerned. "Follow me."
She raised an eyebrow.
"I promise I won't take advantage of you," he said seriously. "I thought you might need help retying your dress."
Nodding, she followed him, holding her dress even closer to her body. She tried not to think about how embarrassing the situation was.
"Turn around," Lancelot said, sitting down on the bed.
"This is your master's room?"
"Yes." He pulled her dress over her shoulders. "My master is away. He didn't even tell me he was leaving."
"It was probably ur-urgent." Her breath hitched as he expertly retied her strings. "You sure know your way around a dress."
"My mother was a dress maker," he said standing up. "I never had a sister, so she made me help her sometimes. It wasn't as miserable as you might think."
"Was?"
Lancelot stood up, frowning. "My mother and father died when our village was raided years ago."
"I'm sorry." She blushed and shuffled her feet. "I shouldn't have asked."
"Now you must let me ask you a personal question," Lancelot said, walking around to face her.
"It was Arthur," she blurted. "He…"
"Did he force you?"
"No." She placed a hand on his chest to calm him. "I was scared at first, but somehow I knew that Prince Arthur would never force anyone. It's not in his nature. He seemed confused."
She noticed his clenched fists and sighed.
"It's okay. He didn't do anything. I'm actually more embarrassed that you had to see me this way."
"I didn't see anything."
"I wasn't implying-" She blushed. "I should probably go before I say something idiotic."
Bowing her head, she practically sprinted towards the door.
"Wait." She turned to face him. "Elaine, right?"
"Yes." She smiled. "Elaine Astolot. Lady Morgana's handmaiden."
"I'm-"
"You're Lancelot!" she blurted out.
He raised an eyebrow and she promptly covered her mouth with her hand
"It was nice to meet you, " he said, smiling at her. "I will see you around the castle?"
"Most definitely," she said, smiling back. "Thank you for your help."
He nodded and left the room.
Elaine pressed her hand to her heart as the blood rushed to her pale face. She smiled, replaying the moment in her head for a few seconds before she too left the room.
When Gwen awoke, she felt the hard, smooth tree trunk against her back. She tried to move, to stand up, but she soon discovered that her hands were tied tightly around the tree, restricting her movement.
"You're finally awake, I see."
Gwen looked up in alarm at the sound of the masculine voice. A tall, slender figure approached her. He was milky white with piercing green eyes that were almost too beautiful to look at.
Gwen struggled to free herself to no avail. When he reached her, the only thing she could do was glare angrily at it.
"Come." He snapped his fingers, and the ropes binding her hands disappeared. "There is much to show you and very little time."
Gwen stumbled forward and stood straight, hands at her sides.
"I'm not going anywhere with you," she said, glowering, "You shot me."
"And yet you feel no pain," He said, smiling.
Gwen gasped as she pressed her hand to her side. There were no sharp pains, no open skin. It was as if she had never been injured.
"I am Esedril," the creature said. "You are in Elpheria now, my Lady. I'm sorry, but I have no time to show you around."
Gwen's eyes centered immediately on his ears. They were indeed slightly pointer than those of a human. She didn't know why she didn't notice them before.
"I don't understand," Gwen said, still unmoving. "I've been through this forest many times when I was younger. I've never seen an elf before now."
"Our priestess is ill," Esedril explained. "She keeps our territory. Without her, our land will be revealed to Uther. He has been searching for it for years since the purge. If he finds us now, my people will surely be massacred."
Gwen's face softened. "I'm sorry."
"Our magic is fueled by the moon. Normally, the priestess keeps us safe with her elemental magic. When there is a new moon, the rest of us are extremely weak," Esedril said, sadly. "I'm sure we have been spotted by the knights. If they strike tonight, we have no chance of survival. That is why we need your help."
He gestured at her to follow him and, this time, she didn't object.
Elven territory wasn't as obviously beautiful as the Fairy Kingdom but Gwen thought it had a natural appeal. The trees were impossibly tall and they bent over the forest protectively. The trees were all interconnected by ivory bridges and Gwen could see light emitting from each of the tree trunks.
"This is where all the elders live," Esedril explained. "Our priestess lives in this center tree."
She watched as he pressed his hand to the tree trunk and muttered some language under his breath. Within seconds, an archway opened and the two entered.
Gwen's breath caught in her throat as the tree trunk closed behind her. The inside of the tree was 100 times larger than she imagined. She suspected it was the Elven magic that made it so, but it was unexpected nonetheless.
Several candles floated above their head and the room was extremely fragrant. It smelled like herbs, flowers, and earth and made Gwen feel very drowsy. The walls were lined with marble and inscribed with what Gwen suspected was Elvish.
In the center of the room, there was a circular alter where a female elf lay with her hands across her chest. Several elves with white cloaks surrounded her, holding hands and chanting.
"She's awake, Priya," Esedril announced, pointing to Gwen. "Now the ritual can begin."
Gwen suddenly felt alarmed. "Ritual? You didn't say anything about a ritual. You asked for my help!"
She backed away from him and reached for her side only to realize that her sword was nowhere to be seen.
"Don't be alarmed, my child."
Priya sat up on the alter and gave her a weak smile. If Esedril hadn't told Gwen the priestess was an elder, she would not have known. She was very beautiful and did not look a day over thirty. Her red hair was short, falling just above her shoulders. Her eyes were bright green like Esedril's.
"What do you want from me?" Gwen asked once her initial awe had worn off. "I don't know any magic. I can't offer you anything really. I don't know why you could possibly want me."
"You are Caelia's granddaughter," said Priya. "Descendent of the royal line. You are just what we need."
Gwen was getting tired of the cryptic messages. All the magical creatures she had encountered seemed to share this trait. Why couldn't they just straightforward?
"Can you please just tell me what you want from me?" Gwen asked, barely masking her aggravation. "The sooner you tell me, the sooner I can help you."
"I need a drop of your blood," Priya said.
Gwen blinked.
"My blood?"
"Yes," Priya replied. "The illness has targeted my magic. The potion my apprentice has concocted needs an ingredient rich with magical power. Fey blood is particularly potent."
Gwen remembered the conversation she had with Morgana. She was hearing so much about this Fey blood that she was actually starting to believe it. But it still didn't make any sense.
"Why me?" Gwen asked. "I've been to Fey Kingdom. There are thousands and thousands of Fairies you could have chosen.
"We are kin, you and I," Priya explained. "Our ancestors were the elementals, creatures of earth, fire, water, and air who possessed magic in its basest form. They used to roam the earth long before our time. Faeries and evolved from the sylphs, the air elementals, while the elves evolved from undines, the water elementals.
"Most faeries, like elves, are ruled by the moon. The sun rules you. Your magic does not depend on the moon's cycle and the magic in your blood is much more powerful," she finished.
"How does everyone else know about this except for me?" Gwen asked. "First Caelia, now you-"
Priya coughed and blood flew from her mouth leaving a bright red spatter on the floor.
"Please hurry," Esedril said, pressing a hand to her shoulder. "It's spreading."
Gwen wanted answers badly, but not at the expense of a life. She rushed forward and held out her hand.
Priya handed her a crystal knife from under her robe.
"It must be willingly given," she said.
One of the robed elves handed her a vial. Biting her lip, Gwen held her hand over the vial and slashed her wrist with the knife. Blood dripped from its tip into the bottle. She capped it and handed it to Priya.
"I thank you," Priya said, handing the vial to one of the elves, who poured the blood into a goblet.
The potion sizzled and turned from green to gold as the elf handed the goblet to Priya.
"When I drink this, I will fall into a deep sleep. I will not be able to hold up the barrier as I will not have control of my powers. Your friends must take over for me," she said, looking very serious. "If not, Elpheria will not be able to withstand Uther's assault tonight."
"My friends? What do you mean by that-"
One of the walls suddenly burst open, revealing Merlin and Morgana, who both looked like they had run a marathon.
"Release her," Merlin commanded, a blue sphere of energy surrounding his right hand, "or you'll regret it."
The orb in Morgana's hand was white and much smaller than Merlins, but her glare was much more menacing.
"If I find that you laid a finger on her-"
"Guys!" Gwen shouted. "It's okay! They haven't done anything to me. They just needed my help."
They lowered their hands and Morgana rushed over to her and wrapped her arms around her neck.
"My god, I thought something had happened to you," she said. She pulled away and inspected her face. "You're really okay?"
"Apart from some lost blood, I'm fine," she said. "I'll explain later. The elves are in trouble. Priya says you can help."
Gwen pointed to the priestess and Merlin and Morgana turned to her.
"I'm afraid time is too short for much explanation or even introductions," she said quickly. "I'm going to need the two of you to take my place on the alter just for tonight. Your combined magic is powerful enough."
Merlin and Morgana looked at each other before turning back to Priya.
"Don't worry," Priya said, noticing their twin expressions of anxiety. "Your barrier will not be as powerful as mine as the ritual will be different, but it will be sufficient. Come."
Priya stepped off the alter as Morgana and Merlin took her place. They sat on the stone structure awkwardly and waited for further instruction.
"Press your palms against each other," said Priya.
Morgana raised her hands without hesitation. Merlin lifted his with a little hesitation before pressing his hands against hers. There was a crackle of electricity and they jumped back from each other in shock.
"Interesting," Priya mused. "Your magic is astoundingly compatible."
"What does that mean?" Merlin asked.
"Nothing," Priya replied with a tiny smile. "Do it again."
They pressed their palms together, this time enduring the shocks that traveled through them.
"Close your eyes and focus your energy," she instructed. "Imagine the pulsing sphere of burning magic within you. You must reach inside yourself some of it out. Once you do that, you can meld it into any shape. Your bond will help you extend the barrier."
They both closed their eyes. Merlin saw the blue ball of energy almost immediately, but he couldn't reach it. Morgana only saw a small glimmer of light.
"It's not working," she said, opening her eyes.
"You must figure out the rest on your own. I cannot help you any further," Priya said, lifting the goblet. "I have trust in the both of you. You have until sundown."
She turned to Gwen.
"Go and visit your father. I can feel that you're missing him," she told her.
"But-"
"There is nothing more you can do here," she said. "Go. It's not far from here. If anything should happen, Esedril will send you a message."
Gwen nodded hesitantly.
"Good luck to all of you, " she said before she downed the contents of the goblet.
She swayed and Gwen managed to catch her before she hit the ground. The hooded elves rushed over and carried her away.
Gwen turned to look at her friends who were focusing hard on producing the barrier. Priya was right; there was nothing left for her to do here.
The broken wall had already repaired itself, leaving no other entrances in the circular room.
"The tree knows you are no foe," said Esedril. "Press your palm against the wall and you can go."
"Thank you, " she said as she pressed her hand against the wall.
A large archway opened again and she stepped over the threshold. Esedril followed her.
"Thank you for saving my sister," he said, placing a hand on her shoulder. "Both she and I owe you something in return."
"No," Gwen protested, "I couldn't possibly-"
"Wait here," he said.
A few minutes later, he returned with her horse in tow and a bright silver sword in his hand.
He handed it to her. "I've infused it with Mithos. It is our life force. I've only given you a little. It can harness some of the magical power in your blood that is otherwise blocked to you."
Gwen marveled at the sword. Esedril had not replaced the sword her father had given her, which she greatly appreciated. She would have refused to wield any other sword he'd given her.
"Be wary," Esedril warned. "It will only harness the magic if you tell it to. It feeds on your experience. You cannot wield the sword at full power as you are. You must train with it constantly. If you use it before you're ready, it will bring you to the brink of death and it is nearly impossible to come back from it."
Gwen sheathed the sword. "Thank you," she said, mounting her horse. "It's more than I could ever hope for."
"You are most welcome," he said, bowing to her. "Safe journey, princess."
Gwen blushed and could only mumble a hurried thank you before she galloped away through the weak barrier in the direction of her house.
When Gwen arrived at her tiny cottage, her heart swelled with anticipation. For the first time in as long as she could remember, she was actually afraid of what her father would say to her.
She knocked and waited with bated breath.
The door swung open to reveal her father, who looked just as she remembered him, only slightly skinner.
"Gwen?" he said, stepping towards her. "I-"
She flung herself into his arms, not able to bear the possibility of his words of disappointment.
"I'm sorry," she said pressing her head against his shirt. "I didn't mean to trick you. I just…it was the only opportunity I was ever going to get. I couldn't say no. It was my dream. It is my dream, father. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry…"
She felt her father press his lips to her forehead. "It's alright. I'm not angry. I was at first. I thought you were doing something reckless and stupid and a part of me still does. Prince Gwyddno explained everything to me when I confronted him. I'm just glad you're home.
He released her and the two of them walked into the house. Gwen took a hearty whiff. To her, the palace was slightly cold. She still wasn't used to its stone walls and its extreme cleanliness. Her house smelled of earth and spices and she could feel he warmth from the fire run through her entire body.
She was home.
Gwen heard footsteps rushing towards her. Gwyddno ran to her and gave her a hug. Once she got over the shock, she hugged him back. There was an odd familiarity in the hug that was a bit unusual. Despite the fact that she'd switched places with him and sent a few letters via Merlin, they were practically strangers.
"How's palace life?" he asked her, grinning. "Is the prince as pompous as ever?"
Gwen blushed. "He's fine. I don't know what you're talking about."
Gwyddno narrowed his eyes. "Don't tell me you…"
"Again," she said, blushing harder, "I don't know what you're talking about."
"I can tell you're going to need an update on that spell I cast," he said, ignoring her response. "I can't believe you! Arthur Pendragon? His arrogance proceeds him!"
Her father saved her from any further onslaught.
"You must be hungry," he said. "I've smoked pheasant just the way you like it. I know it's not palace food, but-"
"You don't know how much of missed your food," she said, rushing towards the table. "The palace food's good, but it's lacks heart," she said, digging in enthusiastically.
"Let me pour you some water," Gwyddno said.
He closed his eyes and whispered some words under his breath. The pitcher lifted off the table and tipped a cool stream of water inside her clay cup.
Gwen raised an eyebrow. "I could have done that myself," she said. "You just wanted to show off."
"Indeed I did," he said, grinning and sitting across from her. "You aren't the only one who's been training hard. I've been studying every book I can get my hands on. I even invented a magical honing spell. I used it to find the druids."
Gwen swallowed. "Druids?"
"They are a peaceful, nomadic magical people and otherwise extremely hard to find. They have agreed to take me under their wing," he said proudly. "They said I have potential. It really made Mordred jealous. He's their prodigy-"
Gwen coughed, wondering if she'd heard him correctly.
"Did you say Mordred?" she asked. "Tall, piercing eyes, creepy beyond measure?"
"Yeah." He eyed her strangely. "How did you know."
"We've met," Gwen said darkly. "If I were you, I would go back to practicing magic from the books Merlin sent you. Mordred's dangerous and if the he is among the druids, I suspect they are too."
She didn't want to mention the fact that Mordred had almost killed her. If she did, she was sure her father would never let her leave the house again. She would write Gwyddno a letter instead.
"You're wrong," he said, shaking his head. "There's a lot you don't know about them. Arthur and his tyrant of a father probably brainwash the knights with anti-magic propaganda."
"They do not," she said, feeling the anger rise in her chest. "I've been training for months and we've only been on one mission to scope out the druids."
"Is that when you met Mordred?"
Gwen had never thought about it like that before. She had been chosen to go on a mission to look for the druids. She had been so wrapped up in the aftermath that she completely forgot that simple fact. Was Mordred only trying to protect his people when he created that alternate realm?
It did not excuse the fact that he nearly killed her, but it definitely gave her a new way of looking at things.
Gwyddno took her silence as affirmation. "I rest my case."
Gwen shrugged. She'd rest her case too. For now, at least.
"More pheasant?" Tom asked.
"No," said Gwen, "I'm full. It was delicious father."
"That's how he found me out you know," Gwyddno said, smirking, "I make a mean pheasant."
Gwen narrowed her eyes. "What is that supposed to mean?" she asked, glaring at the two of them.
"Actually, I suspected something long before that," Tom said, cutting off the argument. "You looked like Gwen and you sounded like her, but a father knows his daughter. I could tell there was something off about you."
"I'm sorry I caused you so much worry," Gwen said, feeling down again. "I meant to come see you sooner, but I couldn't bear your disappointment."
"I still think what you did was incredibly reckless," her father said in a voice that made her feel even more horrible, "but I am proud of you," he added.
Her heart swelled.
"Tell me of your adventures," he said, sitting beside her. "I would love to hear what you've been doing these last few months."
She smiled as she began her tale, starting with her first brawl with Arthur.
Morgana and Merlin had been sitting with their palms together for hours. Only Merlin had succeeded in producing a rather weak barrier around the alter.
"It's no use," said Morgana, dropping her hands. "I've only recently been able to use my magic. I have no idea how to control it, Merlin!"
"You can't just give up," Merlin told her, placing a hand over her own. "The elves are counting on us. If we don't protect them, Uther will surely order his knights to set this forest ablaze."
Morgana retracted her hand. "You think I don't know that? That makes it even more painful."
"Morgana," he said, sighing, "Both of us need to do this. There's no time for arguing."
She'd rarely seen him this serious before. His piercing gaze made her stomach churn.
"How did you do it then," she asked, putting her hands up again. "Priya's advice didn't help me at all. I can see the orb just fine. I just can't reach it."
"You have to think of something that you want badly," he said, placing his palms against hers once more. "The analogy will make the magic easier to grasp."
"What did you think about?" she asked.
Merlin blushed. "I'd rather not divulge that."
"You're really no fun, Merlin," Morgana said, sighing. "I'll try it and see if it works."
She thought immediately of Gwen. The images flashed through her brain. Strong, courageous, adorable Gwen who she'd loved as long as she could remember. She thought of Gwen and Arthur, destiny's couple chosen by fate. She couldn't get in the way of fate, she couldn't get in the way of fate…
The orb was in her reach now. She opened her eyes and watched in satisfaction as if floated in front of her. It hovered in her hands and she imagined it circling around her and melding with Merlin's own small barrier.
"I told you you could do it," Merlin said proudly.
"Yeah," she sadly. "I did it.
"Now we just have to extend it," said Merlin. "This is the hard part."
An archway opened in the wall and Esedril came rushing in.
"The knights of Camelot," he said, panting, "they're just left and are on their way!"
"We need more time!" Merlin exclaimed.
"You must hurry!" Esedril said before rushing out again.
"Morgana, listen carefully."
She could hear Merlin's voice in her head and though it frightened her, she let him speak.
"I want you to push all of your magic forward. I will push mine forward as well. We have to push with equal strength or else the barrier will fall."
"I'll try," she said to him, surprising her self when she realized she was speaking inside his mind.
"You'll succeed."
She felt a wave of encouragement was over her and she truly believed his words.
"Let's do this."
"Then the elves released me and I came straight her," Gwen finished.
"I can't believe you got to see the elves," Gwyddno said, pouting. "I've always wanted to see them for myself."
Gwen ignored him and turned to her father. "Both the elves and Caelia said I have fey blood. They think I'm royalty. That can't be true, can it? I mean, mother died when I was young and you're completely human."
As Tom opened his mouth to respond, a small red bird with green tipped feathers flew through the window and landed on the table. It blew fire from its beak and within seconds, the fire created words in the air.
Knights are on their way. The barrier is still not complete. They need more time than we can give them. We are in danger. Please help us.
Gwen jumped up from the table immediately.
"I have to go," she said hurriedly. "They need my help."
She looked at her father, sadly. "It was nice being home and seeing you again, even if it was only for a little while."
"Go," he said. "We have plenty of time."
"Good Luck," Gwyddno said.
Gwen nodded, gave her father one last glance, and rushed out the door.
As soon as she left, Tom doubled over and began to cough. Blood flew from his mouth, staining his clothes.
"Why did you lie to her?" Gwyddno asked, helping him up. "You don't have time. She should get the chance to spend whatever precious moments she has with you."
Tom shook his head. "If I tell her, she'll quit her training. She'll never achieve her dream. I'd rather die than let that happen."
Gwyddno looked at him sympathetically.
"She'll recognize the symptoms. If she were to tend to me, she would soon realize that I have a magical illness," he explained weakly. "Then she'll know the truth about you, about me, everything. It's too early. We must wait a little longer."
"She loves you more than her dream," Gwyddno told him.
"And I love her more than anything in this world," Tom said. "I won't let her risk everything for a dying man."
Gwyddno ran his hand through his hair and sighed as he helped Tom clear the table.
Gwen jumped off her horse and tied it to a tree when she caught sight of Elpheria through the trees.
She could hear the sound of horses trampling through the forest and the sound of Arthur's voice in the distance.
She pulled out her sword. The name 'Selene' popped into her head as she held it. She guessed that was what the sword was called.
She knew she shouldn't after Esedril had warned her, but she really had no other choice.
"Selene," she said, feeling a bit awkward whispering to a sword, "Make me invisible to everyone except Arthur."
Nothing happened.
"Make me invisible to everyone except Arthur…please?"
She felt like a bucket of ice had just been poured over her. She clenched her teeth to stop them from chattering.
"Thanks," she whispered, sheathing the sword.
She wasted no time running towards Elpheria, flinging her arms in front of the barrier. Arthur was approaching on horseback, his knights nowhere to be seen. She thanked her lucky stars. She knew this maneuver; he'd told the other knights to fall back and wait for his signal.
When he noticed her, his eyes widened considerably. He jumped off his horse and approached her, unable to believe his eyes.
"Gwyn? What the hell are you doing here?"
"You can't do this, Arthur," she pleaded. "You just can't!"
"I don't know how you got here," he said, "but you must stand aside. My father has ordered us to destroy this place and leave none alive."
As he said it, she could tell he was conflicted. The words coming out of his mouth were Uther's. The motivation was Uther's. Arthur wanted no part in this; she could see it in his eyes.
"The elves are peaceful people," she said defiantly. "They have done nothing to Camelot. They are defenseless. This will not be a battle, Arthur. It will be a massacre. It is something that will haunt you for the rest of your life."
"I must do this," he said.
She could tell his resolve was getting weaker. The sword was buzzing angrily in her sheath as if alerting her that her time was running out.
"If you do this," she said, fixing him with her most determined stare, "I will never forgive you. I've told you once that you're the one person I can count on. Don't make a liar out of me."
Arthur stood rigid for a moment before he lowered his sword. "I…"
"I know that, in your heart, you know it isn't right. You have a duty to your father, but you have a duty to Camelot, first and foremost. Isn't that the pledge you take when you become a knight?"
He looked at her and gaped, still not saying a word.
"Go home, Arthur," she said, placing her hands over his. "I'll see you when I return."
In that moment, the barrier extended over her and she could no longer see Arthur standing in front of her.
Her sword was shaking now and she felt incredibly weak.
"Selene," she said wearily. "That's enough."
She felt the magic flow back into her center and lock back in place away from her reach.
Her body slid to the ground and she rolled onto her back staring at the canopy of stars above her head. She'd done it. They were all safe. She could finally rest now.
Gwen felt water rush down her throat and her eyes shot open. She was lying down on a hammock made of silk inside a rather large circular room.
"For a moment, we thought we'd lost you."
Gwen looked up to see Priya standing above her, smiling.
"Reckless, just like your mother," she said, handing Gwen the goard of water.
Gwen nearly choked on her water. "My mother has been here?"
"She used to come here all the time when she was younger," said Priya. "She loved this place."
"You're not going to tell me anything else, are you?" Gwen asked.
She was beginning to understand now.
"It's not time for me to know," she sighed. "That's what you're going to tell me, right?"
"You learn fast," Priya said holding a hand out to her.
Gwen took it and stood up, dusting off her pants, trying her best to hide her frustration.
"It will all make sense, but it is not my place to tell you," Priya added.
That may have been true, but it certainly didn't make Gwen feel any better. Sighing, she pressed her hand to the wall and the doorway opened again. Priya followed her outside.
"Your friends are still holding up the barrier," she explained. "I will take over from them once the sun fully rises."
Gwen could feel the barrier less than three feet away from her.
"Thank you for your hospitality," Gwen said as she approached it. "It was very nice meeting you."
"Wait," Priya said.
She whistled and a few moments later, a bird landed on her shoulder. It was the same red bird that had delivered the message from Esedril.
"Take her," Priya said, gesturing to the bird. "Her name is Fira. I think she's meant to be yours."
The bird flew on top of Gwen's head and sat there, looking comfortable.
"She's a phoenix," Priya explained. "They are born from sun rays every two hundred years."
"Wow," Gwen said glancing up at the bird on her head. "Thank you!"
"They are very smart, self sufficient birds. You need not keep her in the castle, but she will always be near and will come to you when you call her."
"I don't know how I could possibly repay you for this," Gwen said in astonishment. She did a twirl in her excitement and the bird twirled with her."
Then she remembered where was, coughed and stood up straight.
To her surprise, Priya giggled.
"You are your mother's daughter through and through," she said, smiling. "Now run along. I know you wish to reach Camelot. I can feel it. On behalf of Elpheria, I thank you for what you have done for us. You are welcome here anytime you wish, princess."
Priya bowed and again, Gwen felt awkward. She wished people would stop doing that!
"I still don't believe that I'm a princess of anything," Gwen said. "But I know I'm not your princess. You outrank me here."
"There is no such thing as rank," Priya said, shaking her head. "I have more power, and more experience as a priestess, but I don't have authority. I only have the respect of my people. When an elf calls you princess, he or she means to say that you are beautiful, strong, and kind."
Gwen blushed even harder.
"Take this vial too," said Priya. "It will lessen the swords effect on you, but not by much. I believe you will need it very soon."
"T-thank you," she said., still embarrassed. "I hope to see you again."
"And I you," Priya said. "Ka emesia, my child."
"Ka emesia," Gwen responded before she walked through the barrier back into the forest of Camelot.
Gwen arrived at the castle at dawn. Fira had flown away into the trees when they had arrived and Gwen bid her farewell. She decided she was going to like having a constant companion. Even with so many friends surrounding her, she still felt a bit lonely and out of place within the cold walls of the castle.
Feeling incredibly light, she cracked open the door to Arthur's room and took a peek. The prince was sitting on his bed, staring out of the window. He looked as though he hadn't slept.
"Arthur?"
She walked inside the room and closed the door behind herself.
"And so you return." He stood up, and stared at her from across the room. "I've been waiting all night."
Her smile fell. There was something off at about him. The fire that usually danced in his eyes when he spoke to her was gone.
"I nearly slept with a handmaiden yesterday you know," he said, as though he was telling her the weather. "She reminded me that I am still a man, despite what you seem to think."
The balloon of happiness in her chest deflated at his words and she pressed her back against the wall to keep herself from falling.
Arthur faltered for a second, knowing he had hit her where it hurt. He felt regret in the pit of his stomach, but it was masked by the rage he felt in his heart.
"I followed your orders instead of my father's yesterday," he continued. "I stood in front of the court and lied to him and he humiliated me. Told me I was weak, that I have no business leading the army."
"I-"
"Not only did you humiliate me," Arthur continued. "You emasculated me! You messed with my head and used our relationship to get what you wanted!"
"You were going to massacre an entire race for no reason!" Gwen shouted, regaining her composure. "You would have done something dishonorable had I not stopped you."
"YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO SPEAK OF HONOR!" Arthur yelled, slamming his fist into the wall.
Gwen was genuinely scared. She'd never seen Arthur like this.
He sighed and pressed his hand against his face. "I put everything on the line to be with you, against my best judgment. I kept thinking you were worth it. That even though I was falling for a man, you were worth it."
He glared at her. "Then the oddest thing happened in the forest today. One moment you stood there as a man, the next, you were speaking to me about my duty and of Camelot and…you were a woman."
Gwen felt her heart explode in her chest. No. It couldn't be.
"I thought my eyes were deceiving me," Arthur continued, noting her shock. "Then I thought about it and it all began to fall into place. Your hair, your freckles, that figure. I knew it didn't make sense, but you enchanted me so much that I ignored my instincts."
Her throat was frozen shut. She was finding it difficult to breathe.
"When you walked through that door as a woman, I knew it was true," Arthur said. "I was right all along. You tricked me. You lied to me. You made me feel…"
"Arthur," Gwen said. "Despite everything. Despite the trickery and the lies. What I feel for you…its real. I didn't make that up. I haven't harmed the real Prince Gwyddno. I made a deal with him-"
"I don't believe you," Arthur said bitterly. "If you used magic to glamour yourself into Camelot, you must have used magic to enchant me."
"No, please," she pleaded, tears running down her cheeks. "I didn't do it to hurt anyone. I only wanted to prove myself to you. I wanted to become a knight. I didn't expect I would feel this strongly-"
"I've heard enough," Arthur said. "It goes without saying that we're through."
She sunk to her knees as though the wind had been knocked out of her.
"You are hereby disqualified. I will alert the knights when the tournament starts in five days."
His words were like a knife twisting in her heart.
"No," she whispered. "Please don't do this."
"And," he said, looking down at her in disgust. "I want you to leave Camelot immediately and never return."
He stomped past her and slammed the door as he left her, sitting there on her knees.
It was over. It was all over.
Come, you spirits
That tend on mortal thoughts, unsex me here,
And fill me from the crown to the toe topful
Of direst cruelty!
Macbeth Act 1, scene 5, 39-43
My heart ached as I wrote this chapter. I'm so mean to Gwen. But she's not allowed to have everything. That's my rule. So for the sword and the bird and the victory, Arthur finds out her secret. I told you it wouldn't last long.
Please let me know what you think!
Miki-hime
Author: Miki-hime
Rating: T, may change to M if I feel up to it.
Characters/Pairing: Arthur/Gwen, Gwen/Lancelot (in the beginning), Merlin/Freya, Merlin/Morgana?
Word Count: 80,469 (Total)
Genre: AU, Adventure, Romance
Disclaimer: This is purely for fun, not for profit. Don't sue me, it's a waste of your time.
Summary: For Gwen, being a girl was hard enough. Being a girl pretending to be a man to get enlisted into the army? Impossible.
Author's Note: I've decided to make this 30 chapters instead of 40 because I don't want the story to drag on too long. I'm aiming for 120,000 words. If inspiration really hits, and soon, I'll make it 40 chapters. Any comment or review you can offer is greatly appreciated!
Unsex Me Here
The odd wave of euphoria started to wear off once Arthur returned to his room. He lay on the bed and sighed as he looked at the ceiling and a slew of thoughts flowed through his mind.
Gwyn was the scrawniest, prettiest boy he'd probably ever seen, but he was still a man when it came down to it.
He didn't really know how to explain how he felt. It was a nice feeling knowing that he cared for someone who cared for him back. It was also nice knowing he had someone to kiss whenever he felt like it.
What scared him more than anything that he was having these feelings for a man. He was the crowned prince, future king of Camelot. He was fully expected to produce an heir. It was just another duty he was expected to fill. This thing between them wasn't going to last. It was completely irrational.
For some reason, whenever he was around the other prince, all such thought flew out the window. His heart would constrict, almost painfully. His pulse would race. Sometimes he felt like he would simply overflow.
It was strange. Ever since they'd returned from that strange world, he found himself forgetting that Gwyn was even a man. He'd heard of knights who'd lost their limbs, who could still remember the feeling of having a hand or a foot. When they kissed, it was if he could feel the curve of breasts under his shirt, or the heat of a female core through his training pants.
Though delusions made it easier for him to kiss him, to touch him, and to let the other prince touch him, it made Arthur wonder if he was crazy. Their recent encounter made him realize that he couldn't imagine the idea of … performing the same act on Gwyn. Even so, the attraction he felt towards him.
It just didn't make any sense!
There was a soft knock on the door.
"Come in," Arthur said, sighing.
"Merlin has just left, my lord, " said a soft, womanly voice. "He asked me to finish your laundry."
"Typical Merlin." Arthur rolled his eyes. "Just… just set them down anywhere."
Arthur sat up and watched as the servant bent down and dropped the basket in the corner. He noticed the soft curve of her hips under her soft green dress and the way her dress clung to her slim waist.
"Come here," he said.
The woman, Elaine, turned around to look at him. She was a beautiful woman, blonde, with a heart-shaped face and strawberry lips.
"My lord?"
He patted the spot next to him on the bed and slowly, hesitantly, she sat down beside him.
He pulled at the bow at the back of her corset, watching in awe as her entire dress began to fall apart, revealing the creamy skin beneath.
She gasped, but he ignored her. It'd been so long since he'd fooled around with one of he servant girls. He expected the sound to rile him, but he felt nothing.
He pulled the clip out of her hair and watched her hair fall down her back in waves. Her dress was hanging off her shoulders. All he had to do was pull it off her shoulders.
He reached out a hand towards her shoulder and ran his hand down the curve of her arm.
"There is one person I know I can trust. One person that I know would never betray me. You are that person. "
He dropped his hand.
"Go." He managed to choke out. "Leave me."
She nodded, holding her dress tightly against her chest, and running from the room as fast as her legs could carry her.
He watched her go, feeling the dread and shame pool deep within his stomach. What on Earth had possessed him to do such a thing? He'd only been joking when he mentioned Elaine. He had never planned to…
Arthur flopped back onto his bed, burying his head into his pillow. He was certain he didn't like men, yet Gwyn had a hold on him somehow.
Another knock.
"Come in."
"The king requests your presence in the war room, sire," the knight announced. "He said it's urgent."
"Urgent," Arthur repeated, standing up quickly. "Did he say anything else, Leon?"
"Yes, sire," Leon said. "There has been a sighting of elves in the forest. Their barrier has apparently been weakened. Your father says this may be our only chance to finally defeat them"
Arthur felt his heart drop into his stomach. He jumped off the bed, grabbing his sword.
"Let's go."
Elaine Astolot was a woman of virtue. She was beautiful, desired by many, but she had never even kissed a man, let alone slept with one.
So when Prince Arthur practically disrobed her, she was taken by surprise. Her friends would call her lucky to have caught the eye of the prince, but she felt dirty after the encounter. She shuddered to think of what would have happened if he hadn't stopped.
She was in so much distress as she ran from his room that her body collided with another and she fell to the ground.
She crossed her hands protectively over her chest as she fell, lest her dress fall of completely.
"Are you alright?"
Elaine looked up into the eyes of Lancelot, Prince Gwyddno's impossibly handsome manservant.
"Here." He pulled her to her feet, looking concerned. "Follow me."
She raised an eyebrow.
"I promise I won't take advantage of you," he said seriously. "I thought you might need help retying your dress."
Nodding, she followed him, holding her dress even closer to her body. She tried not to think about how embarrassing the situation was.
"Turn around," Lancelot said, sitting down on the bed.
"This is your master's room?"
"Yes." He pulled her dress over her shoulders. "My master is away. He didn't even tell me he was leaving."
"It was probably ur-urgent." Her breath hitched as he expertly retied her strings. "You sure know your way around a dress."
"My mother was a dress maker," he said standing up. "I never had a sister, so she made me help her sometimes. It wasn't as miserable as you might think."
"Was?"
Lancelot stood up, frowning. "My mother and father died when our village was raided years ago."
"I'm sorry." She blushed and shuffled her feet. "I shouldn't have asked."
"Now you must let me ask you a personal question," Lancelot said, walking around to face her.
"It was Arthur," she blurted. "He…"
"Did he force you?"
"No." She placed a hand on his chest to calm him. "I was scared at first, but somehow I knew that Prince Arthur would never force anyone. It's not in his nature. He seemed confused."
She noticed his clenched fists and sighed.
"It's okay. He didn't do anything. I'm actually more embarrassed that you had to see me this way."
"I didn't see anything."
"I wasn't implying-" She blushed. "I should probably go before I say something idiotic."
Bowing her head, she practically sprinted towards the door.
"Wait." She turned to face him. "Elaine, right?"
"Yes." She smiled. "Elaine Astolot. Lady Morgana's handmaiden."
"I'm-"
"You're Lancelot!" she blurted out.
He raised an eyebrow and she promptly covered her mouth with her hand
"It was nice to meet you, " he said, smiling at her. "I will see you around the castle?"
"Most definitely," she said, smiling back. "Thank you for your help."
He nodded and left the room.
Elaine pressed her hand to her heart as the blood rushed to her pale face. She smiled, replaying the moment in her head for a few seconds before she too left the room.
When Gwen awoke, she felt the hard, smooth tree trunk against her back. She tried to move, to stand up, but she soon discovered that her hands were tied tightly around the tree, restricting her movement.
"You're finally awake, I see."
Gwen looked up in alarm at the sound of the masculine voice. A tall, slender figure approached her. He was milky white with piercing green eyes that were almost too beautiful to look at.
Gwen struggled to free herself to no avail. When he reached her, the only thing she could do was glare angrily at it.
"Come." He snapped his fingers, and the ropes binding her hands disappeared. "There is much to show you and very little time."
Gwen stumbled forward and stood straight, hands at her sides.
"I'm not going anywhere with you," she said, glowering, "You shot me."
"And yet you feel no pain," He said, smiling.
Gwen gasped as she pressed her hand to her side. There were no sharp pains, no open skin. It was as if she had never been injured.
"I am Esedril," the creature said. "You are in Elpheria now, my Lady. I'm sorry, but I have no time to show you around."
Gwen's eyes centered immediately on his ears. They were indeed slightly pointer than those of a human. She didn't know why she didn't notice them before.
"I don't understand," Gwen said, still unmoving. "I've been through this forest many times when I was younger. I've never seen an elf before now."
"Our priestess is ill," Esedril explained. "She keeps our territory. Without her, our land will be revealed to Uther. He has been searching for it for years since the purge. If he finds us now, my people will surely be massacred."
Gwen's face softened. "I'm sorry."
"Our magic is fueled by the moon. Normally, the priestess keeps us safe with her elemental magic. When there is a new moon, the rest of us are extremely weak," Esedril said, sadly. "I'm sure we have been spotted by the knights. If they strike tonight, we have no chance of survival. That is why we need your help."
He gestured at her to follow him and, this time, she didn't object.
Elven territory wasn't as obviously beautiful as the Fairy Kingdom but Gwen thought it had a natural appeal. The trees were impossibly tall and they bent over the forest protectively. The trees were all interconnected by ivory bridges and Gwen could see light emitting from each of the tree trunks.
"This is where all the elders live," Esedril explained. "Our priestess lives in this center tree."
She watched as he pressed his hand to the tree trunk and muttered some language under his breath. Within seconds, an archway opened and the two entered.
Gwen's breath caught in her throat as the tree trunk closed behind her. The inside of the tree was 100 times larger than she imagined. She suspected it was the Elven magic that made it so, but it was unexpected nonetheless.
Several candles floated above their head and the room was extremely fragrant. It smelled like herbs, flowers, and earth and made Gwen feel very drowsy. The walls were lined with marble and inscribed with what Gwen suspected was Elvish.
In the center of the room, there was a circular alter where a female elf lay with her hands across her chest. Several elves with white cloaks surrounded her, holding hands and chanting.
"She's awake, Priya," Esedril announced, pointing to Gwen. "Now the ritual can begin."
Gwen suddenly felt alarmed. "Ritual? You didn't say anything about a ritual. You asked for my help!"
She backed away from him and reached for her side only to realize that her sword was nowhere to be seen.
"Don't be alarmed, my child."
Priya sat up on the alter and gave her a weak smile. If Esedril hadn't told Gwen the priestess was an elder, she would not have known. She was very beautiful and did not look a day over thirty. Her red hair was short, falling just above her shoulders. Her eyes were bright green like Esedril's.
"What do you want from me?" Gwen asked once her initial awe had worn off. "I don't know any magic. I can't offer you anything really. I don't know why you could possibly want me."
"You are Caelia's granddaughter," said Priya. "Descendent of the royal line. You are just what we need."
Gwen was getting tired of the cryptic messages. All the magical creatures she had encountered seemed to share this trait. Why couldn't they just straightforward?
"Can you please just tell me what you want from me?" Gwen asked, barely masking her aggravation. "The sooner you tell me, the sooner I can help you."
"I need a drop of your blood," Priya said.
Gwen blinked.
"My blood?"
"Yes," Priya replied. "The illness has targeted my magic. The potion my apprentice has concocted needs an ingredient rich with magical power. Fey blood is particularly potent."
Gwen remembered the conversation she had with Morgana. She was hearing so much about this Fey blood that she was actually starting to believe it. But it still didn't make any sense.
"Why me?" Gwen asked. "I've been to Fey Kingdom. There are thousands and thousands of Fairies you could have chosen.
"We are kin, you and I," Priya explained. "Our ancestors were the elementals, creatures of earth, fire, water, and air who possessed magic in its basest form. They used to roam the earth long before our time. Faeries and evolved from the sylphs, the air elementals, while the elves evolved from undines, the water elementals.
"Most faeries, like elves, are ruled by the moon. The sun rules you. Your magic does not depend on the moon's cycle and the magic in your blood is much more powerful," she finished.
"How does everyone else know about this except for me?" Gwen asked. "First Caelia, now you-"
Priya coughed and blood flew from her mouth leaving a bright red spatter on the floor.
"Please hurry," Esedril said, pressing a hand to her shoulder. "It's spreading."
Gwen wanted answers badly, but not at the expense of a life. She rushed forward and held out her hand.
Priya handed her a crystal knife from under her robe.
"It must be willingly given," she said.
One of the robed elves handed her a vial. Biting her lip, Gwen held her hand over the vial and slashed her wrist with the knife. Blood dripped from its tip into the bottle. She capped it and handed it to Priya.
"I thank you," Priya said, handing the vial to one of the elves, who poured the blood into a goblet.
The potion sizzled and turned from green to gold as the elf handed the goblet to Priya.
"When I drink this, I will fall into a deep sleep. I will not be able to hold up the barrier as I will not have control of my powers. Your friends must take over for me," she said, looking very serious. "If not, Elpheria will not be able to withstand Uther's assault tonight."
"My friends? What do you mean by that-"
One of the walls suddenly burst open, revealing Merlin and Morgana, who both looked like they had run a marathon.
"Release her," Merlin commanded, a blue sphere of energy surrounding his right hand, "or you'll regret it."
The orb in Morgana's hand was white and much smaller than Merlins, but her glare was much more menacing.
"If I find that you laid a finger on her-"
"Guys!" Gwen shouted. "It's okay! They haven't done anything to me. They just needed my help."
They lowered their hands and Morgana rushed over to her and wrapped her arms around her neck.
"My god, I thought something had happened to you," she said. She pulled away and inspected her face. "You're really okay?"
"Apart from some lost blood, I'm fine," she said. "I'll explain later. The elves are in trouble. Priya says you can help."
Gwen pointed to the priestess and Merlin and Morgana turned to her.
"I'm afraid time is too short for much explanation or even introductions," she said quickly. "I'm going to need the two of you to take my place on the alter just for tonight. Your combined magic is powerful enough."
Merlin and Morgana looked at each other before turning back to Priya.
"Don't worry," Priya said, noticing their twin expressions of anxiety. "Your barrier will not be as powerful as mine as the ritual will be different, but it will be sufficient. Come."
Priya stepped off the alter as Morgana and Merlin took her place. They sat on the stone structure awkwardly and waited for further instruction.
"Press your palms against each other," said Priya.
Morgana raised her hands without hesitation. Merlin lifted his with a little hesitation before pressing his hands against hers. There was a crackle of electricity and they jumped back from each other in shock.
"Interesting," Priya mused. "Your magic is astoundingly compatible."
"What does that mean?" Merlin asked.
"Nothing," Priya replied with a tiny smile. "Do it again."
They pressed their palms together, this time enduring the shocks that traveled through them.
"Close your eyes and focus your energy," she instructed. "Imagine the pulsing sphere of burning magic within you. You must reach inside yourself some of it out. Once you do that, you can meld it into any shape. Your bond will help you extend the barrier."
They both closed their eyes. Merlin saw the blue ball of energy almost immediately, but he couldn't reach it. Morgana only saw a small glimmer of light.
"It's not working," she said, opening her eyes.
"You must figure out the rest on your own. I cannot help you any further," Priya said, lifting the goblet. "I have trust in the both of you. You have until sundown."
She turned to Gwen.
"Go and visit your father. I can feel that you're missing him," she told her.
"But-"
"There is nothing more you can do here," she said. "Go. It's not far from here. If anything should happen, Esedril will send you a message."
Gwen nodded hesitantly.
"Good luck to all of you, " she said before she downed the contents of the goblet.
She swayed and Gwen managed to catch her before she hit the ground. The hooded elves rushed over and carried her away.
Gwen turned to look at her friends who were focusing hard on producing the barrier. Priya was right; there was nothing left for her to do here.
The broken wall had already repaired itself, leaving no other entrances in the circular room.
"The tree knows you are no foe," said Esedril. "Press your palm against the wall and you can go."
"Thank you, " she said as she pressed her hand against the wall.
A large archway opened again and she stepped over the threshold. Esedril followed her.
"Thank you for saving my sister," he said, placing a hand on her shoulder. "Both she and I owe you something in return."
"No," Gwen protested, "I couldn't possibly-"
"Wait here," he said.
A few minutes later, he returned with her horse in tow and a bright silver sword in his hand.
He handed it to her. "I've infused it with Mithos. It is our life force. I've only given you a little. It can harness some of the magical power in your blood that is otherwise blocked to you."
Gwen marveled at the sword. Esedril had not replaced the sword her father had given her, which she greatly appreciated. She would have refused to wield any other sword he'd given her.
"Be wary," Esedril warned. "It will only harness the magic if you tell it to. It feeds on your experience. You cannot wield the sword at full power as you are. You must train with it constantly. If you use it before you're ready, it will bring you to the brink of death and it is nearly impossible to come back from it."
Gwen sheathed the sword. "Thank you," she said, mounting her horse. "It's more than I could ever hope for."
"You are most welcome," he said, bowing to her. "Safe journey, princess."
Gwen blushed and could only mumble a hurried thank you before she galloped away through the weak barrier in the direction of her house.
When Gwen arrived at her tiny cottage, her heart swelled with anticipation. For the first time in as long as she could remember, she was actually afraid of what her father would say to her.
She knocked and waited with bated breath.
The door swung open to reveal her father, who looked just as she remembered him, only slightly skinner.
"Gwen?" he said, stepping towards her. "I-"
She flung herself into his arms, not able to bear the possibility of his words of disappointment.
"I'm sorry," she said pressing her head against his shirt. "I didn't mean to trick you. I just…it was the only opportunity I was ever going to get. I couldn't say no. It was my dream. It is my dream, father. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry…"
She felt her father press his lips to her forehead. "It's alright. I'm not angry. I was at first. I thought you were doing something reckless and stupid and a part of me still does. Prince Gwyddno explained everything to me when I confronted him. I'm just glad you're home.
He released her and the two of them walked into the house. Gwen took a hearty whiff. To her, the palace was slightly cold. She still wasn't used to its stone walls and its extreme cleanliness. Her house smelled of earth and spices and she could feel he warmth from the fire run through her entire body.
She was home.
Gwen heard footsteps rushing towards her. Gwyddno ran to her and gave her a hug. Once she got over the shock, she hugged him back. There was an odd familiarity in the hug that was a bit unusual. Despite the fact that she'd switched places with him and sent a few letters via Merlin, they were practically strangers.
"How's palace life?" he asked her, grinning. "Is the prince as pompous as ever?"
Gwen blushed. "He's fine. I don't know what you're talking about."
Gwyddno narrowed his eyes. "Don't tell me you…"
"Again," she said, blushing harder, "I don't know what you're talking about."
"I can tell you're going to need an update on that spell I cast," he said, ignoring her response. "I can't believe you! Arthur Pendragon? His arrogance proceeds him!"
Her father saved her from any further onslaught.
"You must be hungry," he said. "I've smoked pheasant just the way you like it. I know it's not palace food, but-"
"You don't know how much of missed your food," she said, rushing towards the table. "The palace food's good, but it's lacks heart," she said, digging in enthusiastically.
"Let me pour you some water," Gwyddno said.
He closed his eyes and whispered some words under his breath. The pitcher lifted off the table and tipped a cool stream of water inside her clay cup.
Gwen raised an eyebrow. "I could have done that myself," she said. "You just wanted to show off."
"Indeed I did," he said, grinning and sitting across from her. "You aren't the only one who's been training hard. I've been studying every book I can get my hands on. I even invented a magical honing spell. I used it to find the druids."
Gwen swallowed. "Druids?"
"They are a peaceful, nomadic magical people and otherwise extremely hard to find. They have agreed to take me under their wing," he said proudly. "They said I have potential. It really made Mordred jealous. He's their prodigy-"
Gwen coughed, wondering if she'd heard him correctly.
"Did you say Mordred?" she asked. "Tall, piercing eyes, creepy beyond measure?"
"Yeah." He eyed her strangely. "How did you know."
"We've met," Gwen said darkly. "If I were you, I would go back to practicing magic from the books Merlin sent you. Mordred's dangerous and if the he is among the druids, I suspect they are too."
She didn't want to mention the fact that Mordred had almost killed her. If she did, she was sure her father would never let her leave the house again. She would write Gwyddno a letter instead.
"You're wrong," he said, shaking his head. "There's a lot you don't know about them. Arthur and his tyrant of a father probably brainwash the knights with anti-magic propaganda."
"They do not," she said, feeling the anger rise in her chest. "I've been training for months and we've only been on one mission to scope out the druids."
"Is that when you met Mordred?"
Gwen had never thought about it like that before. She had been chosen to go on a mission to look for the druids. She had been so wrapped up in the aftermath that she completely forgot that simple fact. Was Mordred only trying to protect his people when he created that alternate realm?
It did not excuse the fact that he nearly killed her, but it definitely gave her a new way of looking at things.
Gwyddno took her silence as affirmation. "I rest my case."
Gwen shrugged. She'd rest her case too. For now, at least.
"More pheasant?" Tom asked.
"No," said Gwen, "I'm full. It was delicious father."
"That's how he found me out you know," Gwyddno said, smirking, "I make a mean pheasant."
Gwen narrowed her eyes. "What is that supposed to mean?" she asked, glaring at the two of them.
"Actually, I suspected something long before that," Tom said, cutting off the argument. "You looked like Gwen and you sounded like her, but a father knows his daughter. I could tell there was something off about you."
"I'm sorry I caused you so much worry," Gwen said, feeling down again. "I meant to come see you sooner, but I couldn't bear your disappointment."
"I still think what you did was incredibly reckless," her father said in a voice that made her feel even more horrible, "but I am proud of you," he added.
Her heart swelled.
"Tell me of your adventures," he said, sitting beside her. "I would love to hear what you've been doing these last few months."
She smiled as she began her tale, starting with her first brawl with Arthur.
Morgana and Merlin had been sitting with their palms together for hours. Only Merlin had succeeded in producing a rather weak barrier around the alter.
"It's no use," said Morgana, dropping her hands. "I've only recently been able to use my magic. I have no idea how to control it, Merlin!"
"You can't just give up," Merlin told her, placing a hand over her own. "The elves are counting on us. If we don't protect them, Uther will surely order his knights to set this forest ablaze."
Morgana retracted her hand. "You think I don't know that? That makes it even more painful."
"Morgana," he said, sighing, "Both of us need to do this. There's no time for arguing."
She'd rarely seen him this serious before. His piercing gaze made her stomach churn.
"How did you do it then," she asked, putting her hands up again. "Priya's advice didn't help me at all. I can see the orb just fine. I just can't reach it."
"You have to think of something that you want badly," he said, placing his palms against hers once more. "The analogy will make the magic easier to grasp."
"What did you think about?" she asked.
Merlin blushed. "I'd rather not divulge that."
"You're really no fun, Merlin," Morgana said, sighing. "I'll try it and see if it works."
She thought immediately of Gwen. The images flashed through her brain. Strong, courageous, adorable Gwen who she'd loved as long as she could remember. She thought of Gwen and Arthur, destiny's couple chosen by fate. She couldn't get in the way of fate, she couldn't get in the way of fate…
The orb was in her reach now. She opened her eyes and watched in satisfaction as if floated in front of her. It hovered in her hands and she imagined it circling around her and melding with Merlin's own small barrier.
"I told you you could do it," Merlin said proudly.
"Yeah," she sadly. "I did it.
"Now we just have to extend it," said Merlin. "This is the hard part."
An archway opened in the wall and Esedril came rushing in.
"The knights of Camelot," he said, panting, "they're just left and are on their way!"
"We need more time!" Merlin exclaimed.
"You must hurry!" Esedril said before rushing out again.
"Morgana, listen carefully."
She could hear Merlin's voice in her head and though it frightened her, she let him speak.
"I want you to push all of your magic forward. I will push mine forward as well. We have to push with equal strength or else the barrier will fall."
"I'll try," she said to him, surprising her self when she realized she was speaking inside his mind.
"You'll succeed."
She felt a wave of encouragement was over her and she truly believed his words.
"Let's do this."
"Then the elves released me and I came straight her," Gwen finished.
"I can't believe you got to see the elves," Gwyddno said, pouting. "I've always wanted to see them for myself."
Gwen ignored him and turned to her father. "Both the elves and Caelia said I have fey blood. They think I'm royalty. That can't be true, can it? I mean, mother died when I was young and you're completely human."
As Tom opened his mouth to respond, a small red bird with green tipped feathers flew through the window and landed on the table. It blew fire from its beak and within seconds, the fire created words in the air.
Knights are on their way. The barrier is still not complete. They need more time than we can give them. We are in danger. Please help us.
Gwen jumped up from the table immediately.
"I have to go," she said hurriedly. "They need my help."
She looked at her father, sadly. "It was nice being home and seeing you again, even if it was only for a little while."
"Go," he said. "We have plenty of time."
"Good Luck," Gwyddno said.
Gwen nodded, gave her father one last glance, and rushed out the door.
As soon as she left, Tom doubled over and began to cough. Blood flew from his mouth, staining his clothes.
"Why did you lie to her?" Gwyddno asked, helping him up. "You don't have time. She should get the chance to spend whatever precious moments she has with you."
Tom shook his head. "If I tell her, she'll quit her training. She'll never achieve her dream. I'd rather die than let that happen."
Gwyddno looked at him sympathetically.
"She'll recognize the symptoms. If she were to tend to me, she would soon realize that I have a magical illness," he explained weakly. "Then she'll know the truth about you, about me, everything. It's too early. We must wait a little longer."
"She loves you more than her dream," Gwyddno told him.
"And I love her more than anything in this world," Tom said. "I won't let her risk everything for a dying man."
Gwyddno ran his hand through his hair and sighed as he helped Tom clear the table.
Gwen jumped off her horse and tied it to a tree when she caught sight of Elpheria through the trees.
She could hear the sound of horses trampling through the forest and the sound of Arthur's voice in the distance.
She pulled out her sword. The name 'Selene' popped into her head as she held it. She guessed that was what the sword was called.
She knew she shouldn't after Esedril had warned her, but she really had no other choice.
"Selene," she said, feeling a bit awkward whispering to a sword, "Make me invisible to everyone except Arthur."
Nothing happened.
"Make me invisible to everyone except Arthur…please?"
She felt like a bucket of ice had just been poured over her. She clenched her teeth to stop them from chattering.
"Thanks," she whispered, sheathing the sword.
She wasted no time running towards Elpheria, flinging her arms in front of the barrier. Arthur was approaching on horseback, his knights nowhere to be seen. She thanked her lucky stars. She knew this maneuver; he'd told the other knights to fall back and wait for his signal.
When he noticed her, his eyes widened considerably. He jumped off his horse and approached her, unable to believe his eyes.
"Gwyn? What the hell are you doing here?"
"You can't do this, Arthur," she pleaded. "You just can't!"
"I don't know how you got here," he said, "but you must stand aside. My father has ordered us to destroy this place and leave none alive."
As he said it, she could tell he was conflicted. The words coming out of his mouth were Uther's. The motivation was Uther's. Arthur wanted no part in this; she could see it in his eyes.
"The elves are peaceful people," she said defiantly. "They have done nothing to Camelot. They are defenseless. This will not be a battle, Arthur. It will be a massacre. It is something that will haunt you for the rest of your life."
"I must do this," he said.
She could tell his resolve was getting weaker. The sword was buzzing angrily in her sheath as if alerting her that her time was running out.
"If you do this," she said, fixing him with her most determined stare, "I will never forgive you. I've told you once that you're the one person I can count on. Don't make a liar out of me."
Arthur stood rigid for a moment before he lowered his sword. "I…"
"I know that, in your heart, you know it isn't right. You have a duty to your father, but you have a duty to Camelot, first and foremost. Isn't that the pledge you take when you become a knight?"
He looked at her and gaped, still not saying a word.
"Go home, Arthur," she said, placing her hands over his. "I'll see you when I return."
In that moment, the barrier extended over her and she could no longer see Arthur standing in front of her.
Her sword was shaking now and she felt incredibly weak.
"Selene," she said wearily. "That's enough."
She felt the magic flow back into her center and lock back in place away from her reach.
Her body slid to the ground and she rolled onto her back staring at the canopy of stars above her head. She'd done it. They were all safe. She could finally rest now.
Gwen felt water rush down her throat and her eyes shot open. She was lying down on a hammock made of silk inside a rather large circular room.
"For a moment, we thought we'd lost you."
Gwen looked up to see Priya standing above her, smiling.
"Reckless, just like your mother," she said, handing Gwen the goard of water.
Gwen nearly choked on her water. "My mother has been here?"
"She used to come here all the time when she was younger," said Priya. "She loved this place."
"You're not going to tell me anything else, are you?" Gwen asked.
She was beginning to understand now.
"It's not time for me to know," she sighed. "That's what you're going to tell me, right?"
"You learn fast," Priya said holding a hand out to her.
Gwen took it and stood up, dusting off her pants, trying her best to hide her frustration.
"It will all make sense, but it is not my place to tell you," Priya added.
That may have been true, but it certainly didn't make Gwen feel any better. Sighing, she pressed her hand to the wall and the doorway opened again. Priya followed her outside.
"Your friends are still holding up the barrier," she explained. "I will take over from them once the sun fully rises."
Gwen could feel the barrier less than three feet away from her.
"Thank you for your hospitality," Gwen said as she approached it. "It was very nice meeting you."
"Wait," Priya said.
She whistled and a few moments later, a bird landed on her shoulder. It was the same red bird that had delivered the message from Esedril.
"Take her," Priya said, gesturing to the bird. "Her name is Fira. I think she's meant to be yours."
The bird flew on top of Gwen's head and sat there, looking comfortable.
"She's a phoenix," Priya explained. "They are born from sun rays every two hundred years."
"Wow," Gwen said glancing up at the bird on her head. "Thank you!"
"They are very smart, self sufficient birds. You need not keep her in the castle, but she will always be near and will come to you when you call her."
"I don't know how I could possibly repay you for this," Gwen said in astonishment. She did a twirl in her excitement and the bird twirled with her."
Then she remembered where was, coughed and stood up straight.
To her surprise, Priya giggled.
"You are your mother's daughter through and through," she said, smiling. "Now run along. I know you wish to reach Camelot. I can feel it. On behalf of Elpheria, I thank you for what you have done for us. You are welcome here anytime you wish, princess."
Priya bowed and again, Gwen felt awkward. She wished people would stop doing that!
"I still don't believe that I'm a princess of anything," Gwen said. "But I know I'm not your princess. You outrank me here."
"There is no such thing as rank," Priya said, shaking her head. "I have more power, and more experience as a priestess, but I don't have authority. I only have the respect of my people. When an elf calls you princess, he or she means to say that you are beautiful, strong, and kind."
Gwen blushed even harder.
"Take this vial too," said Priya. "It will lessen the swords effect on you, but not by much. I believe you will need it very soon."
"T-thank you," she said., still embarrassed. "I hope to see you again."
"And I you," Priya said. "Ka emesia, my child."
"Ka emesia," Gwen responded before she walked through the barrier back into the forest of Camelot.
Gwen arrived at the castle at dawn. Fira had flown away into the trees when they had arrived and Gwen bid her farewell. She decided she was going to like having a constant companion. Even with so many friends surrounding her, she still felt a bit lonely and out of place within the cold walls of the castle.
Feeling incredibly light, she cracked open the door to Arthur's room and took a peek. The prince was sitting on his bed, staring out of the window. He looked as though he hadn't slept.
"Arthur?"
She walked inside the room and closed the door behind herself.
"And so you return." He stood up, and stared at her from across the room. "I've been waiting all night."
Her smile fell. There was something off at about him. The fire that usually danced in his eyes when he spoke to her was gone.
"I nearly slept with a handmaiden yesterday you know," he said, as though he was telling her the weather. "She reminded me that I am still a man, despite what you seem to think."
The balloon of happiness in her chest deflated at his words and she pressed her back against the wall to keep herself from falling.
Arthur faltered for a second, knowing he had hit her where it hurt. He felt regret in the pit of his stomach, but it was masked by the rage he felt in his heart.
"I followed your orders instead of my father's yesterday," he continued. "I stood in front of the court and lied to him and he humiliated me. Told me I was weak, that I have no business leading the army."
"I-"
"Not only did you humiliate me," Arthur continued. "You emasculated me! You messed with my head and used our relationship to get what you wanted!"
"You were going to massacre an entire race for no reason!" Gwen shouted, regaining her composure. "You would have done something dishonorable had I not stopped you."
"YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO SPEAK OF HONOR!" Arthur yelled, slamming his fist into the wall.
Gwen was genuinely scared. She'd never seen Arthur like this.
He sighed and pressed his hand against his face. "I put everything on the line to be with you, against my best judgment. I kept thinking you were worth it. That even though I was falling for a man, you were worth it."
He glared at her. "Then the oddest thing happened in the forest today. One moment you stood there as a man, the next, you were speaking to me about my duty and of Camelot and…you were a woman."
Gwen felt her heart explode in her chest. No. It couldn't be.
"I thought my eyes were deceiving me," Arthur continued, noting her shock. "Then I thought about it and it all began to fall into place. Your hair, your freckles, that figure. I knew it didn't make sense, but you enchanted me so much that I ignored my instincts."
Her throat was frozen shut. She was finding it difficult to breathe.
"When you walked through that door as a woman, I knew it was true," Arthur said. "I was right all along. You tricked me. You lied to me. You made me feel…"
"Arthur," Gwen said. "Despite everything. Despite the trickery and the lies. What I feel for you…its real. I didn't make that up. I haven't harmed the real Prince Gwyddno. I made a deal with him-"
"I don't believe you," Arthur said bitterly. "If you used magic to glamour yourself into Camelot, you must have used magic to enchant me."
"No, please," she pleaded, tears running down her cheeks. "I didn't do it to hurt anyone. I only wanted to prove myself to you. I wanted to become a knight. I didn't expect I would feel this strongly-"
"I've heard enough," Arthur said. "It goes without saying that we're through."
She sunk to her knees as though the wind had been knocked out of her.
"You are hereby disqualified. I will alert the knights when the tournament starts in five days."
His words were like a knife twisting in her heart.
"No," she whispered. "Please don't do this."
"And," he said, looking down at her in disgust. "I want you to leave Camelot immediately and never return."
He stomped past her and slammed the door as he left her, sitting there on her knees.
It was over. It was all over.
Come, you spirits
That tend on mortal thoughts, unsex me here,
And fill me from the crown to the toe topful
Of direst cruelty!
Macbeth Act 1, scene 5, 39-43
My heart ached as I wrote this chapter. I'm so mean to Gwen. But she's not allowed to have everything. That's my rule. So for the sword and the bird and the victory, Arthur finds out her secret. I told you it wouldn't last long.
Please let me know what you think!
Miki-hime