Reflections 2011
Sorry I have wanted to pen my thoughts down but I am as usual... Lazy..
The whole of 2011, as I looked back, is mostly changes, changes of myself that never sort of build up, more like replacing myself with a new direction. You can say I was just lost.
I started the year trying to attain utmost physical beauty, while I lie to everybody I wanna keep fit. I was just being vain. I got my hands on to this drug named creatine and was full of hopes that it will bring me to another level of nice physique. I did seem to be on the way to get what I wanted, and I was excited. 4 gym sessions and one step class every week, tired but motivated. The skinny o me transformed like every gal's dream to become skinny.
In march my hair appeared to be thinning, it got obvious enough that I cannot deny it. Like hopes crushed, I feel like in my life, there is no such thing as unlimited, and the limit to what I aim to achieve is always close to the ground. For whatever reason, I turned to Buddhism, not to pray to gain back my hair, but to understand that beauty is not important. Such drastic change, in the hope for some balance in life. No more waxing of hair, just the shady me, natural me facing the world.
The whole office thought I looked depressed.
I have talked about going Tibet in end 2010, I have decided to realised this dream. Which I did. Purpose of the trip? I think the best answer is to search for a direction, like how all faithful do it when they are lost. Did I get back answer? Nope. The experience was immense though, and rich and wonderful. Tough nonetheless, but only through such hardship, you get to taste the sweetest experience. Traveling with travel mates never traveled with before, brings surprising adventure and fun. And fond memories that's for sure.
Just before I headed for Tibet, I signed up for a course in CFA, that would definitely move my lazy ass to study. I presumed after not studying for so many years, it would be really difficult to kickstart. Indeed it was terrible. The whole work-study routine filled up every pocket of my life, I can hardly gym, or rest. When I really do not feel like studying, I got left behind and I lost the train.
Just before I suffocate and die, this guy appeared.
(Okay this pic made a LOL entry to this post =P )
He taught me to relax and swept all worries away. Worries will only need to come later which he promised to go through with me. And there goes the 2nd half of the year, lightened the load in the first few months and went on nitro in the 2 months before the exam. The 2nd half year just breezed by, leaving a few friends to wonder where the hell did the mouse go.
For someone like me who has never studied finance before to pick up CFA, I thought I must have been crazy. The amount of things to study, is quite unrealistic to finish within 4 months with work commitments. I was spent.
I ended the year with shopping and celebrations. Not too bad. Of course the above is just a summary of my 2011. Left out a few stuffs like my other dates, ICT and failed interviews.
------
In the end, did I satisfy my vanity? I had one picture up in facebook, that is all.
Did I understand Buddhism? Till now I still could not quite understand, much like studying bazi, it is quite beyond me. I will continue to study them, maybe one day I will get it. And I am proud that I did not stop studying, be it finance or religion.
I think 2011 is a learning journey for me, I have gained much from it, but whether it will be beneficial to me... I will have to leave it to the future to find out.
The whole of 2011, as I looked back, is mostly changes, changes of myself that never sort of build up, more like replacing myself with a new direction. You can say I was just lost.
I started the year trying to attain utmost physical beauty, while I lie to everybody I wanna keep fit. I was just being vain. I got my hands on to this drug named creatine and was full of hopes that it will bring me to another level of nice physique. I did seem to be on the way to get what I wanted, and I was excited. 4 gym sessions and one step class every week, tired but motivated. The skinny o me transformed like every gal's dream to become skinny.
In march my hair appeared to be thinning, it got obvious enough that I cannot deny it. Like hopes crushed, I feel like in my life, there is no such thing as unlimited, and the limit to what I aim to achieve is always close to the ground. For whatever reason, I turned to Buddhism, not to pray to gain back my hair, but to understand that beauty is not important. Such drastic change, in the hope for some balance in life. No more waxing of hair, just the shady me, natural me facing the world.
The whole office thought I looked depressed.
I have talked about going Tibet in end 2010, I have decided to realised this dream. Which I did. Purpose of the trip? I think the best answer is to search for a direction, like how all faithful do it when they are lost. Did I get back answer? Nope. The experience was immense though, and rich and wonderful. Tough nonetheless, but only through such hardship, you get to taste the sweetest experience. Traveling with travel mates never traveled with before, brings surprising adventure and fun. And fond memories that's for sure.
Just before I headed for Tibet, I signed up for a course in CFA, that would definitely move my lazy ass to study. I presumed after not studying for so many years, it would be really difficult to kickstart. Indeed it was terrible. The whole work-study routine filled up every pocket of my life, I can hardly gym, or rest. When I really do not feel like studying, I got left behind and I lost the train.
Just before I suffocate and die, this guy appeared.
(Okay this pic made a LOL entry to this post =P )
He taught me to relax and swept all worries away. Worries will only need to come later which he promised to go through with me. And there goes the 2nd half of the year, lightened the load in the first few months and went on nitro in the 2 months before the exam. The 2nd half year just breezed by, leaving a few friends to wonder where the hell did the mouse go.
For someone like me who has never studied finance before to pick up CFA, I thought I must have been crazy. The amount of things to study, is quite unrealistic to finish within 4 months with work commitments. I was spent.
I ended the year with shopping and celebrations. Not too bad. Of course the above is just a summary of my 2011. Left out a few stuffs like my other dates, ICT and failed interviews.
------
In the end, did I satisfy my vanity? I had one picture up in facebook, that is all.
Did I understand Buddhism? Till now I still could not quite understand, much like studying bazi, it is quite beyond me. I will continue to study them, maybe one day I will get it. And I am proud that I did not stop studying, be it finance or religion.
I think 2011 is a learning journey for me, I have gained much from it, but whether it will be beneficial to me... I will have to leave it to the future to find out.