when the sun rises on ideas that sound good at 3 a.m.
Started my meds, and I'm feeling a bit nauseated as a result, so as soon as I finish up my work for the day, (almost done! Yay!) I'm going to go lay down for a bit. Nothing to worry about. It's happened every time I've started one of these types of drugs.
So, I've put myself in the hot seat and offered up a fic (well, sex scenes within said fic) for public ripping apart to shreds. Don't know what I was thinking, really. I'm not precisely self-conscious about my writing, but I'm no martyr either. Mostly I was just curious, particularly for a male perspective. I already know that he and I don't agree on certain aspects of what we enjoy or want to see in sex scenes in fic. When I write them, I write what I like, or, in the case of fic exchanges, what I'm comfortable writing, and I'm happy with that because writing something I don't want to read myself seems pretty pointless. And would probably make for bad fic as well.
As an aside, it's one of the things I love most about the merry_smutmas exchange - along with pairing options, each participant lists kinks they like (and want to see in their fics) and kinks they dislike, and you can choose within your own comfort zone and know that your recipient probably isn't going to run screaming. Well, not from the kinks anyway! *g* gmth had posted about this the other day - discussing how Smutmas came to be - and it got me thinking about it, and about just how much of an anxiety reliever it is.
When I wrote my reversathon story, my prompt was "R/S, established relationship, mild D/s (top!Remus) - Remus wants to try a new kink/toy, Sirius freaks out." My first reaction when I received it was, "OOoooh! Cool! Fun!" My second reaction was, "Damn! What is Remus going to want to try that's going to make Sirius freak out?!?" Because right there, to make this kind of story believable, a mild or vanilla-type kink wasn't going to work. I'm not particularly comfortable writing hard or extreme kinks, but I was willing to give it a try, and the challenge alone to come up with something was exciting. However, I had no idea what squicks my recipient had because it's a double-blind anonymous exchange. What if I chose, oh, bestiality, and my recipient hated bestiality?
In the end, I chose fisting, but because of the conditions of the prompt, I didn't actually have to write it. It was more what I jokingly termed "injudicious fingering" and "fistus interruptus". Still, my biggest worry was that my recipient might still be squicked just from the idea, and in an exchange, that's a bad thing. Not that I needed to worry about that, since it turned out I was writing for comtesse_sin (*g*), but I did worry - as a number of people who had to put up with my whinging can attest to! :)
That's not to say there were no clues. Each participant listed what they don't enjoy writing, and you can extrapolate from there, but some people are a bit vague when they fill out the forms in exchanges. And it didn't help that I had been given the correct prompt, but the incorrect participant number. Oops! :)
The story turned into an 11K+ word plotty thing with a not very happy ending. But I was pretty damn happy with it, and so was comtesse_sin, which was all that really mattered. I got some lovely feedback on it from others as well. Okay, that mattered, too. :)
And now I've offered it up for the Grolims to stretch across the altar, cut out the heart and roast it in a flaming brazier. If he reads it, that is.
*takes deep breath and stuffs ego in a dungeon*
So, I've put myself in the hot seat and offered up a fic (well, sex scenes within said fic) for public ripping apart to shreds. Don't know what I was thinking, really. I'm not precisely self-conscious about my writing, but I'm no martyr either. Mostly I was just curious, particularly for a male perspective. I already know that he and I don't agree on certain aspects of what we enjoy or want to see in sex scenes in fic. When I write them, I write what I like, or, in the case of fic exchanges, what I'm comfortable writing, and I'm happy with that because writing something I don't want to read myself seems pretty pointless. And would probably make for bad fic as well.
As an aside, it's one of the things I love most about the merry_smutmas exchange - along with pairing options, each participant lists kinks they like (and want to see in their fics) and kinks they dislike, and you can choose within your own comfort zone and know that your recipient probably isn't going to run screaming. Well, not from the kinks anyway! *g* gmth had posted about this the other day - discussing how Smutmas came to be - and it got me thinking about it, and about just how much of an anxiety reliever it is.
When I wrote my reversathon story, my prompt was "R/S, established relationship, mild D/s (top!Remus) - Remus wants to try a new kink/toy, Sirius freaks out." My first reaction when I received it was, "OOoooh! Cool! Fun!" My second reaction was, "Damn! What is Remus going to want to try that's going to make Sirius freak out?!?" Because right there, to make this kind of story believable, a mild or vanilla-type kink wasn't going to work. I'm not particularly comfortable writing hard or extreme kinks, but I was willing to give it a try, and the challenge alone to come up with something was exciting. However, I had no idea what squicks my recipient had because it's a double-blind anonymous exchange. What if I chose, oh, bestiality, and my recipient hated bestiality?
In the end, I chose fisting, but because of the conditions of the prompt, I didn't actually have to write it. It was more what I jokingly termed "injudicious fingering" and "fistus interruptus". Still, my biggest worry was that my recipient might still be squicked just from the idea, and in an exchange, that's a bad thing. Not that I needed to worry about that, since it turned out I was writing for comtesse_sin (*g*), but I did worry - as a number of people who had to put up with my whinging can attest to! :)
That's not to say there were no clues. Each participant listed what they don't enjoy writing, and you can extrapolate from there, but some people are a bit vague when they fill out the forms in exchanges. And it didn't help that I had been given the correct prompt, but the incorrect participant number. Oops! :)
The story turned into an 11K+ word plotty thing with a not very happy ending. But I was pretty damn happy with it, and so was comtesse_sin, which was all that really mattered. I got some lovely feedback on it from others as well. Okay, that mattered, too. :)
And now I've offered it up for the Grolims to stretch across the altar, cut out the heart and roast it in a flaming brazier. If he reads it, that is.
*takes deep breath and stuffs ego in a dungeon*