Re-writing the books.
The Lost Pages of History
Chapter 49 - The Glorious Roman Empire
Rome. An empire so vast it encompassed barren plains, great forests, harsh mountains peaks, and fertile fields of sheep. To the east she was bordered by the pitiful Hindu nation of Egypt, and to the west her boarders touched those of the not quite as pitiful but still rather pitiful Malinese Empire.
The Judaism epidemic.
The Malinese were a strange people who practised a long since dead religion known as Judaism. After the Roman invasion of the Malinese Empire only fragments of the Judaic holy texts survived.
“And Abraham said to Isaac “Fuck Hinduism.” - Genesis 3:12
“The lord God placed a curse upon the Egyptian leader Ghandi. For having the audacity to be the first in the world to create a major religion, God did curse him with a head the literal size of the metaphorical balls it took to do so.” - Curses 1:13
Though the texts reveal a great deal about the reasons for the foundation of Judaism they do not help to explain its inexplicable spread through Rome. Somehow, despite the sealed boarders of Rome, Judaism was able to seep into the outlying cities. This suggests that the fervour with which the Malinese people practiced Judaism somehow became airborne. Luckily the Romans were able to halt the spread of this strange religion with large doses of Vitamin-Fire and Vitamin-Crucifixion.
Chapter 49 - The Glorious Roman Empire
Rome. An empire so vast it encompassed barren plains, great forests, harsh mountains peaks, and fertile fields of sheep. To the east she was bordered by the pitiful Hindu nation of Egypt, and to the west her boarders touched those of the not quite as pitiful but still rather pitiful Malinese Empire.
The Judaism epidemic.
The Malinese were a strange people who practised a long since dead religion known as Judaism. After the Roman invasion of the Malinese Empire only fragments of the Judaic holy texts survived.
“And Abraham said to Isaac “Fuck Hinduism.” - Genesis 3:12
“The lord God placed a curse upon the Egyptian leader Ghandi. For having the audacity to be the first in the world to create a major religion, God did curse him with a head the literal size of the metaphorical balls it took to do so.” - Curses 1:13
Though the texts reveal a great deal about the reasons for the foundation of Judaism they do not help to explain its inexplicable spread through Rome. Somehow, despite the sealed boarders of Rome, Judaism was able to seep into the outlying cities. This suggests that the fervour with which the Malinese people practiced Judaism somehow became airborne. Luckily the Romans were able to halt the spread of this strange religion with large doses of Vitamin-Fire and Vitamin-Crucifixion.