Update!
I know I've promised to update my fics soon, but it seems I just couldn't get them right for some reason... >_< They are mostly done, only need some additional part to complete! Here are some drabbles to compensate for that! <3
i. Look over here
When Yamapi fucked him, he was always rough, and his touch left bruises all over his skin in its wake.
Kame never did anything to stop him.
Every time they were together, Kame knew Yamapi’s eyes were always on him, watching his every reaction to many different treatments Yamapi inflicted on his body. Those eyes were looking at him, but he always felt that they were actually trying to look through him, trying to find someone who wasn’t there, someone who would never be there, someone who wasn’t him.
Who are you looking for? Kame wanted to ask. Are you looking at him right now, in your mind?
Yamapi never screamed, shouted, said, whispered or let out any name during his release. He was always silent, his lips in a thin line, and sometimes Kame found himself wishing Yamapi breathe out a name, any name, during those times they were fucking just so he could be sure that there was someone Yamapi really wanted and thought about deep in his mind. It didn’t necessarily be his name, because even though his heart wanted to believe what they had was more than just a fling, his brain knew better.
When Yamapi stared at him, Kame didn’t look away. He stared at him back.
-
ii. Our distance and that person.
Kame touched him as if he was an expensive porcelain doll that could easily break, when he was actually the one who looked so fragile Yamapi thought he would shatter any second.
But Kame didn’t break; Yamapi could easily pierce his skin, drawing blood and leaving visible marks there, but it was as far as he could get: a nutshell, a dummy, an empty space. Nothing more. He was never able to reach those inside walls, never able to cross the border to his soul. Oh he was there on the borderlines alright, but no matter how far he tried to grab it, his fingers never reached it.
He was there, hovering on the surface, but Kame never let him in.
The place inside Kame wasn’t for him, he understood that much, and couldn’t help wondering if anyone had ever reached that far into Kame before.
He wondered if Jin would be the only one that had ever been invited into that place.
-
iii. If only I could make you mine.
Jin’s hand gripped Kame’s wrist, preventing him from leaving. “Don’t go,” Jin said. “Don’t leave me,” he said again, his voice wavered.
Kame looked at him with terrified eyes, and Jin knew even before Kame said it that he had lost. “I can’t,” Kame said pleadingly, his voice close to breaking. “I can’t. He needs me.”
And Jin was reminded again at how it was him who was trying to plead Kame to stay, but it was Kame who looked so wretched, like Jin was actually the one who was going to leave him and not the other way around.
“I love you,” Jin confessed, hoping it was enough to make Kame stay even though he knew better, that it was just too late. “I love you.”
“He needs me,” Kame said, and through his eyes, Jin could see how Kame pleaded him to understand, to let him go, please, don’t make this any harder, Jin. It wasn’t enough, it wasn’t supposed to be enough reason, but it was, and Jin hated the fact he actually could understand.
He didn’t want to understand.
“But I love you,” Jin pleaded again, and the sound of the rain outside only made it even more heartbreaking. “I love you, you know that. Don’t go, please, I know you love me too.” Again, his voice wavered.
“Jin,” Kame choked out in a whisper that sounded almost like a pained whimper to Jin’s ears, biting his lower lip hard and shaking his head furiously. “I’m sorry,” He said before shrugging Jin off and ran-away, away from him , away from the safe world that Jin had provided him with, away from everything that they could have--away from him, and Jin knew whatever he said wouldn’t be able to make Kame change his mind, and he could do nothing other than to watch him leave.
The rain only poured down harder.
“I love you…” Jin whispered into the air, and the harsh wind blowing outside was the only thing that answered him.
-
A/N: Titles unashamedly stolen from 30kisses . ;p
And just to show that I'm truly doing them one by one rather slowly and not because I'm being lazy, of course not here are the snippets!
Dreaming Through the Twilight 19:
“We have our own way of protecting those who are precious to us.” Toma said reminiscently, his gaze far off somewhere into the distance. “Our methods might be different, but the aim is the same: to prevent them from getting hurt. But somehow, we only ended up to be the ones who hurt them.” He sighed and shook his glass a bit before taking a leisure sip of the liquid inside. “I guess it really can’t be helped.”
There was a smile on Jin’s lips, one that unfortunately didn’t reach his eyes. “Really.” He said simply, just to give Toma a response, because the silence that started to set in really made him feel uneasy and think about things he didn’t want to think about.
“Because we’re only human, sometimes we make mistakes. And really, it’s a normal thing to do - making mistakes - everybody does it anyway. Some mistakes are repairable, and some others aren’t.” Toma continued, dangling his glass between his fingers. “And in our case, the mistake isn’t really unrepairable; it’s more like it will need a long time to fix, but it’s not unrepairable.”
“Oh?” Jin commented. “And what is that?”
...
---
“We’re really hopeless at talking, aren’t we?” he spoke up, eyes fixed on the ceiling above him. He was lying on his back with Kame close by, his breaths ragged.
“Can’t agree more with you there.”
He sighed and tried to get up, leaning on his elbow to look sideways at the other boy. “Let’s just do the not-talking thing, shall we?” he offered, and silently congratulate himself for sounding so casual and not at all excited. Ha.
Kame turned to look at him. “We can’t always do the not-talking thing, you know.” He pointed out. “Eventually, we have to talk about this because we can’t just let things stay unfinished.”
...
TBC.
-
Playing Field Chapter 2:
“Excuse me?”
“You heard me. Just do it. Besides, I know you’ve been itching to do it for a long time.”
“Right.” A skeptical tone. “You see, if I remembered correctly, you were the one who gave me hell the last time I tried to annoy your partner. What gives?”
“This time you have my full permission and I promise there won’t be any retribution from me - as long as you don’t cross any line, that is.”
“Oh, I don’t know. Still looks a bit suspicious, don’t you think? How can I be sure that this isn’t some kind of scheme to bring down my whole team through me before the match?”
“Well, you see, if you won’t do it, then you don’t even have to worry about how I’m gonna cheat during our game because I don’t think my team would make it through the preliminaries.”
A pause.
“…you still can’t use your right arm?” soft, careful tone.
“… I take it you’re gonna do it?”
An exasperated sigh. “Oh fine. Just give me the exact time and place.”
“I... appreciate it.”
“Ohh, don’t you mention it.” A smirk. “At least you owe me one now. Be prepared, Nino, because I’m going to collect some time.”
“Asshole.”
“Your welcome, jerk.”
Clicks.
---
Yamapi sighs. They are at it again.
“So tell me,” Kame says slowly through barely strained annoyance, a vein visible on his forehead. “Why are you all here, in my class, again?”
“It’s lunch time,” Jin points out, looking at Kame like it should be obvious.
“Just give it up already, you imbecile.” Ryo says in his usual haughty voice. “This is free country. We have the rights to do whatever we want wherever we wish. According to the law made back during Meiji Restoration Period, those who step on our rights should be reported to and will be punished by the government accordingly without taking their social standing or status into consideration.”
Shige and Yamapi stare at Ryo, clearly stunned by his little speech. Since when did Ryo…?
“He has just had a Historical and Cultural Studies test this morning,” Uchi tells them both. “The material must be still stuck in his head.” He shrugs.
...
TBC. :p
-
i. Look over here
When Yamapi fucked him, he was always rough, and his touch left bruises all over his skin in its wake.
Kame never did anything to stop him.
Every time they were together, Kame knew Yamapi’s eyes were always on him, watching his every reaction to many different treatments Yamapi inflicted on his body. Those eyes were looking at him, but he always felt that they were actually trying to look through him, trying to find someone who wasn’t there, someone who would never be there, someone who wasn’t him.
Who are you looking for? Kame wanted to ask. Are you looking at him right now, in your mind?
Yamapi never screamed, shouted, said, whispered or let out any name during his release. He was always silent, his lips in a thin line, and sometimes Kame found himself wishing Yamapi breathe out a name, any name, during those times they were fucking just so he could be sure that there was someone Yamapi really wanted and thought about deep in his mind. It didn’t necessarily be his name, because even though his heart wanted to believe what they had was more than just a fling, his brain knew better.
When Yamapi stared at him, Kame didn’t look away. He stared at him back.
-
ii. Our distance and that person.
Kame touched him as if he was an expensive porcelain doll that could easily break, when he was actually the one who looked so fragile Yamapi thought he would shatter any second.
But Kame didn’t break; Yamapi could easily pierce his skin, drawing blood and leaving visible marks there, but it was as far as he could get: a nutshell, a dummy, an empty space. Nothing more. He was never able to reach those inside walls, never able to cross the border to his soul. Oh he was there on the borderlines alright, but no matter how far he tried to grab it, his fingers never reached it.
He was there, hovering on the surface, but Kame never let him in.
The place inside Kame wasn’t for him, he understood that much, and couldn’t help wondering if anyone had ever reached that far into Kame before.
He wondered if Jin would be the only one that had ever been invited into that place.
-
iii. If only I could make you mine.
Jin’s hand gripped Kame’s wrist, preventing him from leaving. “Don’t go,” Jin said. “Don’t leave me,” he said again, his voice wavered.
Kame looked at him with terrified eyes, and Jin knew even before Kame said it that he had lost. “I can’t,” Kame said pleadingly, his voice close to breaking. “I can’t. He needs me.”
And Jin was reminded again at how it was him who was trying to plead Kame to stay, but it was Kame who looked so wretched, like Jin was actually the one who was going to leave him and not the other way around.
“I love you,” Jin confessed, hoping it was enough to make Kame stay even though he knew better, that it was just too late. “I love you.”
“He needs me,” Kame said, and through his eyes, Jin could see how Kame pleaded him to understand, to let him go, please, don’t make this any harder, Jin. It wasn’t enough, it wasn’t supposed to be enough reason, but it was, and Jin hated the fact he actually could understand.
He didn’t want to understand.
“But I love you,” Jin pleaded again, and the sound of the rain outside only made it even more heartbreaking. “I love you, you know that. Don’t go, please, I know you love me too.” Again, his voice wavered.
“Jin,” Kame choked out in a whisper that sounded almost like a pained whimper to Jin’s ears, biting his lower lip hard and shaking his head furiously. “I’m sorry,” He said before shrugging Jin off and ran-away, away from him , away from the safe world that Jin had provided him with, away from everything that they could have--away from him, and Jin knew whatever he said wouldn’t be able to make Kame change his mind, and he could do nothing other than to watch him leave.
The rain only poured down harder.
“I love you…” Jin whispered into the air, and the harsh wind blowing outside was the only thing that answered him.
-
A/N: Titles unashamedly stolen from 30kisses . ;p
And just to show that I'm truly doing them one by one rather slowly and not because I'm being lazy, of course not here are the snippets!
Dreaming Through the Twilight 19:
“We have our own way of protecting those who are precious to us.” Toma said reminiscently, his gaze far off somewhere into the distance. “Our methods might be different, but the aim is the same: to prevent them from getting hurt. But somehow, we only ended up to be the ones who hurt them.” He sighed and shook his glass a bit before taking a leisure sip of the liquid inside. “I guess it really can’t be helped.”
There was a smile on Jin’s lips, one that unfortunately didn’t reach his eyes. “Really.” He said simply, just to give Toma a response, because the silence that started to set in really made him feel uneasy and think about things he didn’t want to think about.
“Because we’re only human, sometimes we make mistakes. And really, it’s a normal thing to do - making mistakes - everybody does it anyway. Some mistakes are repairable, and some others aren’t.” Toma continued, dangling his glass between his fingers. “And in our case, the mistake isn’t really unrepairable; it’s more like it will need a long time to fix, but it’s not unrepairable.”
“Oh?” Jin commented. “And what is that?”
...
---
“We’re really hopeless at talking, aren’t we?” he spoke up, eyes fixed on the ceiling above him. He was lying on his back with Kame close by, his breaths ragged.
“Can’t agree more with you there.”
He sighed and tried to get up, leaning on his elbow to look sideways at the other boy. “Let’s just do the not-talking thing, shall we?” he offered, and silently congratulate himself for sounding so casual and not at all excited. Ha.
Kame turned to look at him. “We can’t always do the not-talking thing, you know.” He pointed out. “Eventually, we have to talk about this because we can’t just let things stay unfinished.”
...
TBC.
-
Playing Field Chapter 2:
“Excuse me?”
“You heard me. Just do it. Besides, I know you’ve been itching to do it for a long time.”
“Right.” A skeptical tone. “You see, if I remembered correctly, you were the one who gave me hell the last time I tried to annoy your partner. What gives?”
“This time you have my full permission and I promise there won’t be any retribution from me - as long as you don’t cross any line, that is.”
“Oh, I don’t know. Still looks a bit suspicious, don’t you think? How can I be sure that this isn’t some kind of scheme to bring down my whole team through me before the match?”
“Well, you see, if you won’t do it, then you don’t even have to worry about how I’m gonna cheat during our game because I don’t think my team would make it through the preliminaries.”
A pause.
“…you still can’t use your right arm?” soft, careful tone.
“… I take it you’re gonna do it?”
An exasperated sigh. “Oh fine. Just give me the exact time and place.”
“I... appreciate it.”
“Ohh, don’t you mention it.” A smirk. “At least you owe me one now. Be prepared, Nino, because I’m going to collect some time.”
“Asshole.”
“Your welcome, jerk.”
Clicks.
---
Yamapi sighs. They are at it again.
“So tell me,” Kame says slowly through barely strained annoyance, a vein visible on his forehead. “Why are you all here, in my class, again?”
“It’s lunch time,” Jin points out, looking at Kame like it should be obvious.
“Just give it up already, you imbecile.” Ryo says in his usual haughty voice. “This is free country. We have the rights to do whatever we want wherever we wish. According to the law made back during Meiji Restoration Period, those who step on our rights should be reported to and will be punished by the government accordingly without taking their social standing or status into consideration.”
Shige and Yamapi stare at Ryo, clearly stunned by his little speech. Since when did Ryo…?
“He has just had a Historical and Cultural Studies test this morning,” Uchi tells them both. “The material must be still stuck in his head.” He shrugs.
...
TBC. :p
-