spontaneous trip to plattsburgh
I've been living on beer and cigarettes for the last few days. It's amazing how I came up here with virtually nothing and I feel like I have everything. Except this Monday, I've been having a time of my life. Just like the old times when I used to be a student here. I got to see everybody, including the ones that I weren't expecting to see; funny how they still remembered me by my first name although we've only met briefly 4 years ago.
Been catching up with a lot of people. I love coffee camp. Went to yoga with noah sort of tipsy from the shots of whiskey. Cooked up some food for people and shared it with some cheap boxed wine. Woke up late and lazy after a night of heavy socializing. Without having to worry about what I need to do today. Cleaned up my lung with some tea in the morning and played some more chess and ran into more people. Took a shower at Memorial Hall where the students go sweat and swim. I feel refreshed.
Tonight is a 12c wing night at Monopole. I'm like way too excited about it. This will be a good way to end this trip: With everyone around, music is playing, we'll be having some delicious convos while we eat some delicious cheap wings and drink good cheap beer. And we'll be watching some local talents on the stage for tonight's Open Mic. It's like those movies that begins with the ending and ends with the beginning. Rather perfect. In circle. In union.
I am very happy how everything worked out on Monday. Being locked up a few times is like some real life practice for aspiring psychologists/anthropologists/social workers/philosophers. I truly feel that more you understand the less angry you are. And not to sound snobby or anything but it's extremely hard for me to be angry because I understand the depth of life and its layers, including the minds of people. Of course, I don't understand it completely and I know that I never will, because knowledge and understanding are much like living beings; you can never define them forever. This sort of makes me emotionless sometimes. Yet I have so much emotions. I feel that people come and go. And that things are never permanent. This makes me feel that everything is so insignificant. If nothing ever lasts, what matters? This used to depress me. Until I realized that this makes all those other things that do matter all much more significant and makes me better focused on those things. And with this non-attachment mindset, I've become completely free from my emotions.
The question remains, however. Is it possible to love somebody when you try to live a life of non-attachment? I'd like to believe so. Though I could never have a conventional relationship with anyone with this sort of mindset and the life style I'm about to enter into; I still believe that my love is infinite and shall be unchecked by any unseen force which clouds over my future. I may be an outlaw. But I know at the end of the day, somebody out there knows what I know. And that's all I need to know. That somebody knew who I truly was. And with that knowledge and conviction, I shall have no regrets when I depart this world.
Been catching up with a lot of people. I love coffee camp. Went to yoga with noah sort of tipsy from the shots of whiskey. Cooked up some food for people and shared it with some cheap boxed wine. Woke up late and lazy after a night of heavy socializing. Without having to worry about what I need to do today. Cleaned up my lung with some tea in the morning and played some more chess and ran into more people. Took a shower at Memorial Hall where the students go sweat and swim. I feel refreshed.
Tonight is a 12c wing night at Monopole. I'm like way too excited about it. This will be a good way to end this trip: With everyone around, music is playing, we'll be having some delicious convos while we eat some delicious cheap wings and drink good cheap beer. And we'll be watching some local talents on the stage for tonight's Open Mic. It's like those movies that begins with the ending and ends with the beginning. Rather perfect. In circle. In union.
I am very happy how everything worked out on Monday. Being locked up a few times is like some real life practice for aspiring psychologists/anthropologists/social workers/philosophers. I truly feel that more you understand the less angry you are. And not to sound snobby or anything but it's extremely hard for me to be angry because I understand the depth of life and its layers, including the minds of people. Of course, I don't understand it completely and I know that I never will, because knowledge and understanding are much like living beings; you can never define them forever. This sort of makes me emotionless sometimes. Yet I have so much emotions. I feel that people come and go. And that things are never permanent. This makes me feel that everything is so insignificant. If nothing ever lasts, what matters? This used to depress me. Until I realized that this makes all those other things that do matter all much more significant and makes me better focused on those things. And with this non-attachment mindset, I've become completely free from my emotions.
The question remains, however. Is it possible to love somebody when you try to live a life of non-attachment? I'd like to believe so. Though I could never have a conventional relationship with anyone with this sort of mindset and the life style I'm about to enter into; I still believe that my love is infinite and shall be unchecked by any unseen force which clouds over my future. I may be an outlaw. But I know at the end of the day, somebody out there knows what I know. And that's all I need to know. That somebody knew who I truly was. And with that knowledge and conviction, I shall have no regrets when I depart this world.