Day 1: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Well today seems kinda weird. I don't really know where to start with this whole thing. I'll start with the beginning. So first thing this morning I wake up at 6:15 this morning, because I have to go to the bathroom. I thought everyone would want to know that. Then I went back to bed. Then I got waken up by my dad because my alarm didn't go off at nine like it was supposed to. This is the second time that's happened in a week. And only at nine o'clock. Really weird. Don't know if that's supposed to be a surprise or not. I got up thinking, so what's going to happen today? What am I expecting? I don't know, surprise me God! So I had half my normal time to get up, but I was out the door at the right time. Or so I thought. I missed my bus. What was really cool was someone came by at the right time to tell me I missed the bus just as I got to the bus stop. I stood there and this car pulls up and some people get out to deliver papers. And this woman tells me, "Oh the bus just went by." And then she told me when I wondered out loud if the 48 would come right after my bus that it was too late for that in the day. So I went to go see if I could catch the 47 which is about a 5 minute jog from my normal stop. I get there to the bus stop and look down the street, and down in the distance I can barely make out that bus. Going away from me. C'mon! Well so I was going to be late for my first class of the day, sociology. Oh yeah, I was taking the bus to get to school. So I'm standing at the bus stop when I see this guy come by and stand across the street at the other 47 stop. So I figure the other bus must be coming, so I hop on over to the other side of the street. We struck up a conversation, and it was kinda cool. I kinda wonder if God had me miss my bus to talk with this guy. We talked about mundane stuff like school (he goes to UofW) and work and stuff. I realise as I get off the bus at KP that we didn't really talk about God at all, except right as we got off and I mentioned camp and he off handedly mentioned the church and how they must have helped me out with money and stuff. And all through our conversation I had this feeling in the back of my mind that I should tell him about what I'm doing this next thirty days, but I never do. I feel like such a chicken. I think maybe that was God's surprise for me. To show me that I need to not be afraid to talk about him. Because I realise after this guy mentioning church that he probably wouldn't have made a deal at all about talking about it. He might even have been interested. I think God's showing me my character (or perhaps lack thereof) this week. Surprise. :(
At KP I transfer busses and head towards school. As I'm driving along I remember that my friend from bible camp lives right on the bus route, and I should go visit her. I think, I'm not going to just get off the bus and see if she's home. That's dumb. But it just sorta felt right so I thought maybe God was telling me I should. So I said if I see her car in the driveway I'll go stop by. My class isn't important anyways. We didn't do anything on Tuesday or all last semester, what's going to change today? So Beth's car was in her driveway, so I pull the chord and get off the bus. Ring the door bell and there she is, say hi, she says come on in. So we talk for about an hour and a half. The topic of relationships that get started at camp came up, and she said they're a waste of time. I remember she was going out with a guy from camp this summer. And I thought maybe I should bring it up. But I don't. Here we go again. In this surprise me book, this guy sure doesn't ever have problems like not talking to people. He has all these meaningful conversations with people, that are just happenstance. But I'm too afraid to get open my mouth. Then I realise I should get going, because my next class is about to start. Beth says that the next bus should be along in about 3 minutes. Well I wait about 10 and no bus comes. So I go back to her place and she looks up the time when the next bus is coming and it's only another couple of minutes. So I head back out to wait.
On the bus I see a girl has this book called "living religions" and I figure that's got to be a sign from God. But I'm like, you can't just ask her what her book's for. Sure you can. No I can't. Yes you can. So after a couple minutes of that, with probably more God than me on the sure you can's I screw up my courage and ask her what course her textbook is for and she says intro to religion. And here again is the perfect opportunity to ask questions and start a conversation, but all I say is cool and sit back in my seat. I'm still kicking myself. God set up all these opportunities to talk with people about him by making me miss three busses, wait actually 4, but I don't take them. I don't like all of these surprises. I'm reminded of the book where Terry (the author) is talking about tough times and how God uses those, but this just seems like some kind of failed test. Just falling to pieces. But God's redeeming grace is amazing. First when I show up late to calculus, I haven't really missed a thing. I'm able to look at the notes of the guy beside me for literally 30 seconds and understand what had been going on for the first 20 minutes, because it was almost the same as last class. Isn't God's grace amazing?! I was able to get all the notes on stuff that I needed.
After class I started walking back to the bus stop via University Centre. And I remember I still need to pay for this semester, so I stop and remember that I now have a $1000 dollar limit for paying for things with interact as opposed to $200, like before. So I can pay the $500 for school. (That's another part of God's grace. Because of scholarships, I only need to pay $500 plus buy my books for this school year.) Because I remember that I see a guy named Justin Barnes, who is a year younger than me and ran track at river east with me. I say hi, and he mentions that he has to hang around till 4:30 for his university track practice. After talking for a couple of minutes I think I should get going, but realise, hey, why don't I just hang out with Justin for a bit. I got nothing else to do. So we sit around talking, and what should happen again? I feel a prompting to talk about surprise me and stuff. And yet again I don't. As I sit here remembering all these passed up opportunites, I feel ashamed. And the thought comes to mind, is this about you, Derek, or God? And in my head I know this next 30 days (slash my life) is about God, but somehow, my shortcoming keep coming to mind. But so does the verse I read the other day in one of my novels I got for Christmas. "For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline." 2nd Timothy 1:7 Oh God please give this spirit. Help me to remember that this life is about you and what you can do and have done through Jesus, not about me and my shortcomings. We all know that I am a fallen being, sinful, imperfect. I ask you to remind me of that. That's the surprise I'm learning from you, God, that it's you that do everything, that I can do all through Christ who strengthens me, but nothing without him.
Anyways back to the "present day". At about 3:30 I figure I should get going and who do I see? Armin and Brandon. So I stop to say hi and they're both skipping computer useless (usage) because it's just that, but it's easy which is why they're taking it. It turns out Armin isn't doing anything after that and when his sister shows up I head on over to Armin's place. The way everything has worked out today bumping into people, I can for sure no longer count as coincidence. This has never happened to me like this, from one thing to the next. Armin drives Corina and I over to his place and we sit in his room and listen to him play a couple of his new songs on guitar and then watch TV. I have to admit. This surprise was awesome! God has given me a great gift in friends, and I don't know where I'd be without them. So Corina makes us supper, how sweet is that and we watch some more TV. Then it's time for the final between Russian and Canada. (World Junior Hockey for you numbskulls that didn't know what was going on. Even I knew what was going on.) And Canada won!!! YAY! It was a great game. But somehow Armin fell asleep. Don't know what's wrong with that kid. This is now around 8:30 and I mention that it's Thursday, which is one dollar movie night at Pick-A-Flick. (Yeah that's right I want my money now Pick-A-Flick, I'm advertising for you!) But at that point Armin's dad comes home and Armin's sure he'll say it's too late to get a movie. (By this point it's almost 9 o'clock.) But surprisingly he says okay, but only if it's short. So we went and rented Four Brothers, which was if not holy, at least entertaining. Revenge movies seldom come under the holy catagory. But it was good. Then Armin drove me home with his dad giving possibly dissaproving looks, telling him this wasn't part of the deal, so I hope Armin didn't get into trouble, but I figure Armin senior needs a few surprises in his life, including a small dose of rebellion from his son's friend.
So now I'm home and recriminating myself for being a chicken all day and not telling anyone about what I was doing and/or more importantly about Jesus. And yet I had an awesome day. How does that work? God gave me a good time, even though I messed up. How sweet is that. You know, I think I'm starting to look forward to tomorrow. I'll just have to do some praying for courage and a spirit of love and discipline, and I'll ask anyone reading this to do the same for me. I don't know what I learned today, what all surprised me, but it wasn't all positive I guess. And yet isn't noticing things to be fixed actually positive? Knowing your enemies is the first step. And if your enemy is yourself, then you better start paying attention for a sneak attack from your own ranks. But now I know what to start working on, and with God's grace I can. Dependence on Jesus has never been said to be easy. That's what needs to happen though. That's what this week is all about. So I'll just think on that 2nd Timothy verse and pray lots and grab myself by the balls and just take a jump head first into tomorrow.
By the way, if anyone wants to borrow that book from me just ask. I think I'll get Blue like Jazz soon and read that too, because Paul mentioned it to me, and it was brought up in the book. I've been told by numerous people that it's good.
There's a difference between sleight of hand And giving everything you have, There's a line drawn in the sand I'm working up the will to cross it.