Facebook and closets....
Interesting that today I began to "invite" some of my leather friends to connect with me on Facebook. Interesting because I have stayed away from lengthy conversations about leather closets, who is in and who is out because, well, I have chosen to keep elements of my life separate.
I have been following the posts of some friends as they struggle with the question on "how out to be as a leather person". I have heard some of the judgment aimed toward those of us who walk the public/private line. There are a variety of reasons why I am not fully "out" as a leather person. Those reasons are my own and range from the possibility of losing my job, to it is a part of my kink that I get to know how perverse I am as others do not see me. The reality is, I am because I am, because I choose to.
It was then that I realized that my life is closeted in both directions. I am just as in the "rest of my life" closet from my leather friends, as I am in a "leather closet" from the rest of my life. Perhaps today I am just open to possibilities of cohesion. And, while I am so enjoying the rest of my life, I miss many of my leather connections.
So, today, I pondered reconnecting with old friends. My life has moved in such a way that I am no longer in the public eye. I live a bit more quietly, do less traveling, teach when asked, correspond a bit with a few, but mainly have been quiet. I did some searching on Facebook, where I am connected with soccer and softball friends, colleagues from work and a few family members. It is there I found quiet a few of my friends in the scene.
The question became, do I send invites? Do I trust that these friends know me well enough to know this is not the place I talk about bdsm? Bigger questions, do we have any thing else in common, can we connect on topics outside leather?
I am curious, so I am hitting "invite".
I have been following the posts of some friends as they struggle with the question on "how out to be as a leather person". I have heard some of the judgment aimed toward those of us who walk the public/private line. There are a variety of reasons why I am not fully "out" as a leather person. Those reasons are my own and range from the possibility of losing my job, to it is a part of my kink that I get to know how perverse I am as others do not see me. The reality is, I am because I am, because I choose to.
It was then that I realized that my life is closeted in both directions. I am just as in the "rest of my life" closet from my leather friends, as I am in a "leather closet" from the rest of my life. Perhaps today I am just open to possibilities of cohesion. And, while I am so enjoying the rest of my life, I miss many of my leather connections.
So, today, I pondered reconnecting with old friends. My life has moved in such a way that I am no longer in the public eye. I live a bit more quietly, do less traveling, teach when asked, correspond a bit with a few, but mainly have been quiet. I did some searching on Facebook, where I am connected with soccer and softball friends, colleagues from work and a few family members. It is there I found quiet a few of my friends in the scene.
The question became, do I send invites? Do I trust that these friends know me well enough to know this is not the place I talk about bdsm? Bigger questions, do we have any thing else in common, can we connect on topics outside leather?
I am curious, so I am hitting "invite".