I hate this life...i want out!
I wanted to enjoy myself and just go for a ride. So, i did what I felt like I needed to do. I went for a ride and had a good time just enjoying the road. I listened to songs that reminded me of that one special girl. It seemed like the road would never end. Black, white, and yellow, sometimes green and red these were the only colors that I saw. I remember days of happiness, us playing laughing smiling in each others arms. We'd both act like we were mad in hopes of getting to feel a touch. It always worked cuz I catered to everything you wanted and even things you never said. I might not have been the one who treated you the best. I might have rushed things just a little bit, but now it's over and the hardest part is getting over it. After the car ride, happiness is over, I'm dealing with my mom again. I don't like hearing her talk, especially not to me. You're supposed to honor ur father and ur mother and i know i don't do that. But, everytime she talks to me all she can do is yell. Next time it happens I have a little story to tell. I hated the days that we'd fight and i loved the days that had nothing but hugs and now the only days i love are the ones when shes not around. I remember having a girlfriend one that made it all go away not one that said be nice but one that said it'll all be okay. I wondered if I was doomed to deal with the bullshit that comes with my mom. I know now that all teenagers haveta deal with the same thing, but mine is oh so much worse cuz i know she cant whisper. She swore to me she'd stop using her voice and the next day she was at it again. Maybe one day I'll get lucky and someone will take me in. I'm hoping that I get kicked out just so I can finally enjoy the happiness that once was when my pops was still around. now it sucks and it sucks badly but what the hell am i to do?? I can't ever do anything since my niece was born. yes life is a wonderful thing, but it gives me more stress i hate it when i get yelled at but then again it happens to all of us. I wonder if theres any1 out there who knows what its like in hell, and if you don't just come to me because i have a pretty good idea of what it is and always will be. won't someone rescue me?!!!