Manifesting Shmanifesting
Last night Jade gave me the book E-Cubed, inside was a card with a painted red heart that read, "He's marrying me, but he's stuck with us. Will you be my maid of honour?" Kels and I will be co-maids, which is cool. And a little surprising - I kind of thought Carley would get the position. And was a little bit hoping that she would. Don't get me wrong, I'm thrilled to be a big part of her big day, but I'm still grappling a bit with feeling like I'm losing her. Plus, I'm not a very good party planner, and now I'll have to organize a stagette and a shower and who knows what else! Ha...
Anyway, I immediately started reading E3 - I'd been wanting to pick it up, and also wanting to reread E2. More Field of Potentiality stuff, more examples of how changing your thinking changes your life.. I think it's really cool, I love quantum physics and energy fields, but there's a tiny little part of me (that has a really big mouth), that likes to pipe up and say, "You can't manifest the man of your dreams. You can't manifest a career that allows you to travel and work from home. You can't manifest money out of thin air." Blah blah blah.
Start small, McKinnley. Right?
Well I hadn't started at all, or at least I didn't think I had, although I've said it a few times lately - how I'd like to go back to working 3 or 4 shifts a week, I even said it to Ashlea over lunch this afternoon. Well around 3pm work called me to say that the construction going on around us cut off our gas and hot water, so they were closing down and I had the night off. For a brief moment I was annoyed, Wednesdays are a good money-making shift (actually, they all are), and I don't like having plans change at the last minute. But then I smartened up and got pretty damn happy about the Universe listening to my desires and granting me a short work week. As an added bonus, Thursdays are my day off, so I now get two days off in a row! Pretty stoked.
I've also accidentally discovered this little trick to keep myself motivated. It's the opposite of list-making. Instead of giving myself a To Do list every day (which I have to sit down and create), I keep a running list of the things I've done during the day. I got this pad of paper which has 'M T W T F Weekend' printed across it, and I just write down what I've done. Even though nobody else will care about the list, for some reason I want to fill it up with the most impressive things. Monday, for example, I went to yoga, painted my dresser, cooked myself breakfast and lunch, did some Spanish learning on Rosetta Stone, had a wee nap, worked a full shift, did some drawing/doodling, then hopped into bed for a little Gossip Girl before lights out. Pretty damn productive day, if I do say so myself.
There are so many things I want to do. It's time to start shifting my daily life to match the person I want to be.
Side note: I'm pretty sure Gossip Girl is making me feel worse about my life. I'm already having a small amount of anxiety about turning 36 next week (which is weird, I've never had an issue getting older), and the show reminds me very unsubtley that I will never be that young or that beautiful or that slim and tightly put together again. HOWEVER, it's never too late to get that rich. And never too late to have ridiculous shenanigans in New York City.
Speaking of NYC, it seems like everything is pointing towards there over the last few days. I started watching GG, Sam is going to New York and I was telling her about my visit there - the lights, the jaw-dropping first glance, the feeling of magic, meeting Matty G, magical movie-esque moments during the wedding trip to Woodstock, which then lead to me rereading my journal from that time and emailing Matty G - even though I haven't heard from him in years. We were out with Jolie and Jeff tonight - Jolie was just in New York and they're getting married there next June, so Jade and Scott are gearing up for another New York trip, and Carley is planning on joining them after the wedding. NEW YORK!! It's been so long since it's even been on my radar, even though it used to be my dream. Interesting. Methinks I should perhaps join Jade and Carley in gallivanting around the city in June. Sounds like funfunfun.
Upwards and onwards, that's where my life is heading. Oh, it's great, don't get me wrong, but there are bigger and better things out there for me!
Anyway, I immediately started reading E3 - I'd been wanting to pick it up, and also wanting to reread E2. More Field of Potentiality stuff, more examples of how changing your thinking changes your life.. I think it's really cool, I love quantum physics and energy fields, but there's a tiny little part of me (that has a really big mouth), that likes to pipe up and say, "You can't manifest the man of your dreams. You can't manifest a career that allows you to travel and work from home. You can't manifest money out of thin air." Blah blah blah.
Start small, McKinnley. Right?
Well I hadn't started at all, or at least I didn't think I had, although I've said it a few times lately - how I'd like to go back to working 3 or 4 shifts a week, I even said it to Ashlea over lunch this afternoon. Well around 3pm work called me to say that the construction going on around us cut off our gas and hot water, so they were closing down and I had the night off. For a brief moment I was annoyed, Wednesdays are a good money-making shift (actually, they all are), and I don't like having plans change at the last minute. But then I smartened up and got pretty damn happy about the Universe listening to my desires and granting me a short work week. As an added bonus, Thursdays are my day off, so I now get two days off in a row! Pretty stoked.
I've also accidentally discovered this little trick to keep myself motivated. It's the opposite of list-making. Instead of giving myself a To Do list every day (which I have to sit down and create), I keep a running list of the things I've done during the day. I got this pad of paper which has 'M T W T F Weekend' printed across it, and I just write down what I've done. Even though nobody else will care about the list, for some reason I want to fill it up with the most impressive things. Monday, for example, I went to yoga, painted my dresser, cooked myself breakfast and lunch, did some Spanish learning on Rosetta Stone, had a wee nap, worked a full shift, did some drawing/doodling, then hopped into bed for a little Gossip Girl before lights out. Pretty damn productive day, if I do say so myself.
There are so many things I want to do. It's time to start shifting my daily life to match the person I want to be.
Side note: I'm pretty sure Gossip Girl is making me feel worse about my life. I'm already having a small amount of anxiety about turning 36 next week (which is weird, I've never had an issue getting older), and the show reminds me very unsubtley that I will never be that young or that beautiful or that slim and tightly put together again. HOWEVER, it's never too late to get that rich. And never too late to have ridiculous shenanigans in New York City.
Speaking of NYC, it seems like everything is pointing towards there over the last few days. I started watching GG, Sam is going to New York and I was telling her about my visit there - the lights, the jaw-dropping first glance, the feeling of magic, meeting Matty G, magical movie-esque moments during the wedding trip to Woodstock, which then lead to me rereading my journal from that time and emailing Matty G - even though I haven't heard from him in years. We were out with Jolie and Jeff tonight - Jolie was just in New York and they're getting married there next June, so Jade and Scott are gearing up for another New York trip, and Carley is planning on joining them after the wedding. NEW YORK!! It's been so long since it's even been on my radar, even though it used to be my dream. Interesting. Methinks I should perhaps join Jade and Carley in gallivanting around the city in June. Sounds like funfunfun.
Upwards and onwards, that's where my life is heading. Oh, it's great, don't get me wrong, but there are bigger and better things out there for me!