my mom and my brother
They can really make my life miserable. I love them lots but sometimes I feel like it's all so stupid. He wants the easy way out and she wants to protect him so that she doesn't lose another child.
When one is up against parental resistance to one's actions, he or she should work around what the parent wants. If in this case the parent doesn't want you to travel far away, you find friends or family that live in a bordering state and you pay for the trip yourself.
If you are the parent, you learn that children grow up and leave home. You understand that your fear of everything in life is not the child's fear. You learn to understand that loss is a part of life and no amount of "protection" will save that child's life.
My older brother died in a car accident almost three years ago. I can be angry. I can hate the gods. I can blame myself. I can blame the chick that was driving the car. I can be pissed off that such a good person died when George Bush is a much more valid target. But none of this will bring him back or change the fact that he was doing something that he wanted to do: travel.
Sometimes people say that they will do almost anything in the world to bring a loved one back from the dead. Not me. I know that he didn't want to die but I also know that if he had the choice he would still travel.
My older brother and I were supposed to go to london one day. He wanted to see it and I promised that we would go because I had a friend who would let us crash at her place. We never got to go but he still managed to travel without me.
What kind of life can one have if fear always stops you from doing the things you want to do? There are so many things I would have never done if fear stopped me. I would never have gotten a job, or went to college or grad school for that matter. I would have never left home or had sex. I would never have traveled abroad or gone clubbing. Fear functions as a warning device. It says you should be cautious and cover your bases but it doesn't say don't do something.
My older brother is dead and yes it would be wonderful if he wasn't but I would have never stopped him from living his life because I was scared that he would die. Death is a part of life. You have to learn to live life to the fullest, so that when you are on your death bed you can say that you have no regrets. You did everything you wanted to do and fear never stopped you. It might have delayed things but it never stopped you.
I want to live it up! I want to be involved and active and passionate! What's so good about being alive if you feel dead inside? So I live for my brother who can't. I will party harder because he can't. I will travel and take the chances he would have taken because he can't. And though I understand my mom's fears, I won't let her stop me because she needs to learn to live. she needs to learn to let go of anger about the things she can't change. Keeping us close won't stop us from dying. If anything leaving in fear makes the negative fester until one day you snap or you resort to things that kill you anyway (alcohol, drugs, and other escapist means because at least for a little while you can experience something better than your world). She needs to remember that my older brother was doing something that he wanted to do and that he would have eventually traveled or gone to Iraq or done something that made him happy but would have been dangerous.
So to my mother I say that I can not make you happy. I cannot live as you live and be happy. I want more from life and I know that I can have it if I want to. I have fears but I treat them like the challenges that they are. My fears dare me to live. I'm taking up the challenge because I want to live.
When one is up against parental resistance to one's actions, he or she should work around what the parent wants. If in this case the parent doesn't want you to travel far away, you find friends or family that live in a bordering state and you pay for the trip yourself.
If you are the parent, you learn that children grow up and leave home. You understand that your fear of everything in life is not the child's fear. You learn to understand that loss is a part of life and no amount of "protection" will save that child's life.
My older brother died in a car accident almost three years ago. I can be angry. I can hate the gods. I can blame myself. I can blame the chick that was driving the car. I can be pissed off that such a good person died when George Bush is a much more valid target. But none of this will bring him back or change the fact that he was doing something that he wanted to do: travel.
Sometimes people say that they will do almost anything in the world to bring a loved one back from the dead. Not me. I know that he didn't want to die but I also know that if he had the choice he would still travel.
My older brother and I were supposed to go to london one day. He wanted to see it and I promised that we would go because I had a friend who would let us crash at her place. We never got to go but he still managed to travel without me.
What kind of life can one have if fear always stops you from doing the things you want to do? There are so many things I would have never done if fear stopped me. I would never have gotten a job, or went to college or grad school for that matter. I would have never left home or had sex. I would never have traveled abroad or gone clubbing. Fear functions as a warning device. It says you should be cautious and cover your bases but it doesn't say don't do something.
My older brother is dead and yes it would be wonderful if he wasn't but I would have never stopped him from living his life because I was scared that he would die. Death is a part of life. You have to learn to live life to the fullest, so that when you are on your death bed you can say that you have no regrets. You did everything you wanted to do and fear never stopped you. It might have delayed things but it never stopped you.
I want to live it up! I want to be involved and active and passionate! What's so good about being alive if you feel dead inside? So I live for my brother who can't. I will party harder because he can't. I will travel and take the chances he would have taken because he can't. And though I understand my mom's fears, I won't let her stop me because she needs to learn to live. she needs to learn to let go of anger about the things she can't change. Keeping us close won't stop us from dying. If anything leaving in fear makes the negative fester until one day you snap or you resort to things that kill you anyway (alcohol, drugs, and other escapist means because at least for a little while you can experience something better than your world). She needs to remember that my older brother was doing something that he wanted to do and that he would have eventually traveled or gone to Iraq or done something that made him happy but would have been dangerous.
So to my mother I say that I can not make you happy. I cannot live as you live and be happy. I want more from life and I know that I can have it if I want to. I have fears but I treat them like the challenges that they are. My fears dare me to live. I'm taking up the challenge because I want to live.