I admit it, I've been cheating....
Yes, LJ, I've been cheating on you. I know you've picked up on it. I've recieved the nudges (thanks mer). I haven't given you the attention I used to. It's just, and this is hard to say, I've met someone else.
There. I said it. Her name is MySpace and she is one naughty, sexy bitch. Aside from the fact that I actually know how to post pictures on her, I can also dress her any way I want without taking an associates degree course in HTML. Myspace fully supports, condones, and actually encourages the creepiest of stalker-like behaviors. I know its wrong, but it feels so good.
After a couple months, I've built up quite a diverse Myfriends portfolio. I've reconnected with a friend I haven't seen or spoken to since about 3rd grade. I've been discovered by old college buddies. Oh, and I hate to be the bearer of hurtful news, but there are other LJ lovers that have been having hot sweaty secret affairs for even longer than me: Braid My Mer, LilbebeJ, Chorda (the Cunt as her mistress refers to her as), and yes, even Cmedefend. I'm sorry to have outed you all, but I'm going for the strength in numbers approach. Hopefully this will take some of the heat off of me. It will be hard for LJ to stay equally mad at all of us for very long.
I know this is hard. You're probably thinking "What the hell does that slut offer that I don't?". Well, I can't quite explain it. Maybe its the power and arrogance I feel when I click that little DENY button after some creep with a mullet named FIREFIGHTER MIKE sends me a friend request. Or maybe its the fact that I can use the threat of removing someone from my TOP 8 as leverage in my close personal relationships. I love watching struggling, shitty bands request friendship by the dozens from complete strangers, in hopes that someone might actually show up to their Tuesday night set at Scorchers Karaokee bar in the North Royalton Shopping Plaza. Hell, some of my friends have even met (and copulated with) people that Myspace introduced them to.
Yes, MySpace is a dirty shameless whore. No more than a popular culture piece of pixel pussy. I met her sister, Facebook, but she just wasn't for me. I pride myself in keeping with the newest designer drug and Facebook went stale in Dec. 2004.
I really think we can make this work, LJ. I care about you and I will never forget who opened my eyes to this world. I swear I haven't even blogged on her!! Ok, one time, but it wasn't the same. She's like the Angelina and you're the Jennifer. She's the kind you have cheap hot sex with but you're the one I'd take home to mom and dad. It's not over between Myspace and me. But I know where my roots are and I promise to devote more time and attention to you.
AHHH! Feels like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I am reborn.
TTYL!!!
There. I said it. Her name is MySpace and she is one naughty, sexy bitch. Aside from the fact that I actually know how to post pictures on her, I can also dress her any way I want without taking an associates degree course in HTML. Myspace fully supports, condones, and actually encourages the creepiest of stalker-like behaviors. I know its wrong, but it feels so good.
After a couple months, I've built up quite a diverse Myfriends portfolio. I've reconnected with a friend I haven't seen or spoken to since about 3rd grade. I've been discovered by old college buddies. Oh, and I hate to be the bearer of hurtful news, but there are other LJ lovers that have been having hot sweaty secret affairs for even longer than me: Braid My Mer, LilbebeJ, Chorda (the Cunt as her mistress refers to her as), and yes, even Cmedefend. I'm sorry to have outed you all, but I'm going for the strength in numbers approach. Hopefully this will take some of the heat off of me. It will be hard for LJ to stay equally mad at all of us for very long.
I know this is hard. You're probably thinking "What the hell does that slut offer that I don't?". Well, I can't quite explain it. Maybe its the power and arrogance I feel when I click that little DENY button after some creep with a mullet named FIREFIGHTER MIKE sends me a friend request. Or maybe its the fact that I can use the threat of removing someone from my TOP 8 as leverage in my close personal relationships. I love watching struggling, shitty bands request friendship by the dozens from complete strangers, in hopes that someone might actually show up to their Tuesday night set at Scorchers Karaokee bar in the North Royalton Shopping Plaza. Hell, some of my friends have even met (and copulated with) people that Myspace introduced them to.
Yes, MySpace is a dirty shameless whore. No more than a popular culture piece of pixel pussy. I met her sister, Facebook, but she just wasn't for me. I pride myself in keeping with the newest designer drug and Facebook went stale in Dec. 2004.
I really think we can make this work, LJ. I care about you and I will never forget who opened my eyes to this world. I swear I haven't even blogged on her!! Ok, one time, but it wasn't the same. She's like the Angelina and you're the Jennifer. She's the kind you have cheap hot sex with but you're the one I'd take home to mom and dad. It's not over between Myspace and me. But I know where my roots are and I promise to devote more time and attention to you.
AHHH! Feels like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I am reborn.
TTYL!!!