Hahahah! Danke, my dear dear Akirad. :) [Meaningless info, but: there's a Kyrgyz name that's read like your username read backwards]
Hmm. Well. If you're really interested in silly happenings (and that was REALLY silly, I still think)- it's... Damn, I'm ashamed of what I did! >.>
ALLRIGHT, anyway - I went and SMSed a guy I like asking for moral help. I'm in the beginning of writing a 3,500 words essay on International Relations, and the deadline is Friday by midnight, and I've only have 300 words so far. To add to that - no thoughts whatsoever found inside my cranium. I lose.
>.> Well... It's like, as if I can't overcome everything on my own, and need others' help. It was kind of... weak and girly of me? >.> Or something. And I wrote it as a reaction to my complete frustration and despair to ever find words to fill the word limit.
::misses you even more cuz that's the way things are:: XD
Man, whenEVER am I going to get my free access to Trillian back? My bro cut it off, when he found the PC was infected with a virus. And now there's a firewall. Which asks for a password so Trillian could access the net. And I don't knowwww it! ::howls in despair::
Have you tried just going back to using YIM? Or maybe I should just get over myself and send you an e-mail, because our time zones are so different, and I've turned into an old lady that goes to bed ridiculously early because of work. I have a bazillion different e-mail addresses for you, is there a particular one that you use, so I don't have to blindly guess and hope you get it if I do indeed start sending them out to you?
I GUESS that's silly. Look, Syinat. Just be yourself, for fucks sake. Don't worry about occasionally contradicting, or negating, your self-constructed tower of grandeur and genius? Who gives a fuck in the end? Plenty of brilliant, powerful, amazing people have SO many flaws it's ridiculous. But that's another part of the splendor and beauty.
Just please be yourself. If you'd rather have something about yourself rock solid, or different, then change it. It won't change immediately, but a part of you will have, once you realize that it needs to be changed, and that you have the full capacity to do it.
I can tell you this stuff about a million times, but it won't matter until you fully realize it within yourself, all the way down. Then, learning, growing and becoming the ultimate "you" will be easy.
Hah, good advice. I guess. But to answer your question - I give a fuck in the end. And whenever else. Which is why it matters to me whether the things I do would seem silly or not. But yeah, overall, I do agree. The problem is, and I'm pretty sure you know this yourself, is that it's not always easy to act on the words. Knowledge isn't enough. There also has to be the so-called 'will to power' - that something inside your chest that actually knows and does, and not just knows it regularly. And that's the hardest thing. It only happens rarely, and never when you want it to happen. So, there's no point in actually repeating this knowledge like a magical chant of some sort, until that time when you do knowI'd get offended, because what you wrote there could seem to imply that I don't know about that - that I didn't know that if I wanted to change something, I'd really need to do it, and that I need to be myself. But I won't because, ah, I don't know why. It's just that this whole problematic issue (for you, me, everyone, I guess) is from
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I am truly sorry about that one. Please don't be offended. The entire point of me replying the way I did was because you indeed DO "know" what needs to be known. Why would you take it that way anyway? Aren't I always the one telling you how brilliant you are, and how much more so than myself? I think if you're talking implications, that would definitely imply that I believe you know way more than myself
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In minute detail. Then we can make you feel better.
Or maybe worse.
Reply
Hmm. Well. If you're really interested in silly happenings (and that was REALLY silly, I still think)- it's... Damn, I'm ashamed of what I did! >.>
ALLRIGHT, anyway - I went and SMSed a guy I like asking for moral help. I'm in the beginning of writing a 3,500 words essay on International Relations, and the deadline is Friday by midnight, and I've only have 300 words so far. To add to that - no thoughts whatsoever found inside my cranium. I lose.
Reply
What's silly about that?
Reply
See, it's silly!
Reply
*misses you*
Reply
Man, whenEVER am I going to get my free access to Trillian back? My bro cut it off, when he found the PC was infected with a virus. And now there's a firewall. Which asks for a password so Trillian could access the net. And I don't knowwww it! ::howls in despair::
Reply
Have you tried just going back to using YIM? Or maybe I should just get over myself and send you an e-mail, because our time zones are so different, and I've turned into an old lady that goes to bed ridiculously early because of work. I have a bazillion different e-mail addresses for you, is there a particular one that you use, so I don't have to blindly guess and hope you get it if I do indeed start sending them out to you?
Reply
Don't worry about occasionally contradicting, or negating, your self-constructed tower of grandeur and genius? Who gives a fuck in the end?
Plenty of brilliant, powerful, amazing people have SO many flaws it's ridiculous. But that's another part of the splendor and beauty.
Just please be yourself. If you'd rather have something about yourself rock solid, or different, then change it. It won't change immediately, but a part of you will have, once you realize that it needs to be changed, and that you have the full capacity to do it.
I can tell you this stuff about a million times, but it won't matter until you fully realize it within yourself, all the way down.
Then, learning, growing and becoming the ultimate "you" will be easy.
Take Care my dear Syinat.
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