Saturday
Today, I was supposed to go to work from 3pm on, but yesterday my client called and said that my little one has walking pneumonia and since it's contagious I should not come. My little one also has salt wasting adrenal insufficiency and any illness can cause a fatal secretion of salt and other hormones. Usually, a stress dose of hormones and steroids can take care of things. The mom gets very upset, rightfully so, and wants to stay home with her daughter so she can be there should she be needed. I can't even come close to imagining how frightening this must be for all of them. Consequently, I had the day off. Instead, K and I went to lunch, did some shopping at Costco and visited with a friend in Tiburon. The weather was so beautiful that we went for a long walk along the Paradise Kay waterfront, and I think I even got a little sunburn on my face.
Once that was all done I ran over to the office and brought some water I had bought at Costco. They are so good to me there. They know that I take meds in the morning on an empty stomach. That kind of messes with my breakfast schedule. Get up at 6, take meds (can't eat for 60 - 90 minutes), get ready for work, leave at 6:45am, drive for a little over an hour and start work at 8am. Usually around 9am, my boss tells me that it is time for breakfast and we go and eat oatmeal and fruits. What a wonderful way to begin the day. What a nice boss to have.
Since then, I've been sitting on the couch off and on, watching this and watching that. I've tried to broach the topic of dementia a few times with K and each time I do, I get this big wave of avoidance coming my way. Each time, I acknowledge just how frightening this is for me and must be for him, I get told that he is not afraid. And as I get told this, his legs start bouncing, all of his nervous twitches start and he gets angry if I don't respond by dropping the subject.
There are things that need to be settled. What to do with the two houses in Ghana if the worst comes to pass. Who will get the houses? To whom in his family shall the money go? How do I do this and that? I need to know and he doesn't want to talk about it. So I find all kinds of creative ways of broaching the subject. I tell him stories of friends of mine, half of them invented, who had to face similar issues. That appears less threatening if it happens to somebody else. When I say "I would do such and such in a similar situation" then he sometimes gives me his opinion about what he thinks 'this friend of mine' should have done. I get to extrapolate from that.
Just a little while ago, we were watching The Africa Channel. There was a lovely program on about the Ashanti king, the Asantehene. Towards the end of the show, he asked me what channel this was. He has asked me this at least 7/8 times before. And I have answered as often. We have written it down on the channel guide. None of which he remembered. When I pointed it and the need for brain exercises out to him, he quickly reacted in his usual way: Anger at how I hadn't reminded him properly, shifting the focus away from himself onto me and making me the problem. This way, there is no need to look at the reality.
Then peace came back, just as soon as it left. The news are on TV and they seem to take all of his focus. They always have. And I have time to go sit down and start updating things a little.
Tomorrow I'm going to work with a client who is suffering from some form of dementia. Not sure if it is Alzheimers, though she gets the meds as if it were. But her speech is not impacted the least little bit. Alas, I'm no expert on diagnosing. I am, however, becoming one in how to handle the constant mood shifts and not being remembered 5 minutes after reintroducing myself. Who knows, maybe she'll throw me out again a few times tomorrow. In the meantime, I am going to try and get some sleep, so I'm up to it.
Good night!