[Yuri doesn't believe anything will really help, but since meeting Keith, he's selfishly wanted the illusion of comfort, not having had it before.] I'd like that. You can soothe me.
And yes, I want to know everything about you. [Even though he wasn't planning on returning the favor anytime soon, he did want to know.] Every simple story.
[Yuri sighed, relaxing into Keith's touch as he was held closer. Keith's thoughts about goodness were somehow charming. Here was someone who would never sin, would never need to be cleansed.] That wasn't exactly what I meant. What you want is something good that can't be attained. As you told me moments ago, perfection's impossible. It's good to strive for it, but you shouldn't chastise yourself if you can't achieve it. What I mean is that I sometimes feel a sense of doubt. That I'm good at all. [Sometimes, when his father comes to him, but he can't talk about that. He shouldn't be talking about even this much, but Keith feels so warm and comforting, and he's tired after the long night. He's never confided in anyone like this before, but then, he's never been married before.]
We...haven't had a whole lot of time to sit down and talk lately [which was a real shame as far as Keith was concerned, spending time with Yuri meant so much to him and not being able to because of work was often hard on him. He knew his next suggestion would take him away from the Hero business briefly, but ratings didn't matter to him and he was still a man. If he couldn't spend time with Yuri he knew he would be miserable...how could he do anything if he was miserable] I was thinking...if you get some free time...maybe we can go somewhere. We can hole up somewhere and I can talk to you until you're sick of it, tell you everything.
[The fact that Yuri was relaxed and calm in his arms drove home just how much Keith was missing him] Well...I can think of something good, Yuri...I love you and you feel the same, so...so if you have doubts...then you know that...love is a good thing [Keith didn't know what had happened to make Yuri feel this way, but he hoped that having this one thing in his life would change his mind.]
No, we've both been so busy lately. [He paused, suppressing a sigh.] Now I see why you've been so busy. It makes sense. [He still didn't like it, and it would take him time to come to sort through the jumble of feelings the revelation had produced.] It's difficult for me to get time away. [The truth was, he'd taken vacation so rarely, he probably would have had no trouble at all, but work was his excuse for so many things--a perfect cover for his other activities. Now he wasn't sure if he wanted to be alone with Keith for so long. A Hero. What if he said the wrong thing, or if the emotions he was sure to so carefully control got the better of him? Yet it was still Keith, his husband.] I'll see what I can do. I would like that. [All those ordinary, everyday stories might outweigh the maddening fact of Keith's occupation.] I want to hear everything. [After all, he might lose him someday. He doesn't know how long they have, considering.]
Love. [As odd as it was, that was true.] Yes. [Love makes him wary. The people he loves betray him, leave him--but Keith hasn't yet, except for this new information which isn't exactly a betrayal, more of an accident. Yuri had never thought he would have something like this, someone to love him. He leaned into Keith's touch, reaching out to find Keith's hand with his own.] I do return your feeling. [It's still hard for him to say it.]
If you can...I'd like it too...I wanted to save up for a proper...ahah...honeymoon...[the word sounded strange coming from Keith, at least it did to his own ears, maybe a little sentimental coming from a Hero. Weren't Hero's always expected to put on certain airs, to behave in a certain way that was appropriate? To look brave in the face of anything? He felt nervous and excited all over again. The prospect of being with Yuri in a sense that, for most people, was very normal always caused his insides to jolt a little bit. Though he also knew he had to be grounded, even though bringing himself back down to earth was hard.] If you can't get away it's alright though...I understand...you're very important to a lot of people. You're my partner, but I do getthat you're not mine even if I'd like to keep you...we'll make some time for my stories though. I promise.
Yes. [The NEXT parroted, carefully brushing his lover's hair from his eyes with the tip of his nose, enjoying this degree of closeness that allowed him to inhale the scent of his lover, his soap, his shampoo...he was refreshing and warm. When Yuri's fingers found his own he instinctively wound their hands together. He knew that it was hard for his lover to speak what he was really feeling sometimes, but Keith didn't need to hear the words repeated back to him, he knew how the other man felt. There were other ways for him to feel Yuri's love.] Will you kiss me?
A honeymoon. [It was a very sentimental word. He might have been happier to hear it previously that he was now.] Yes, we should have one, shouldn't we? It's the usual thing to do. [He was not at all used to doing the usual thing. He wanted to, sometimes. Sometimes very much. He gave a soft sigh.]
I'll make the time, Keith, though I can't tell you when until I've done some rearranging. It might take a little while, but I will. I am important to others, but our partnership is important, too.
[Otherwise it would seem suspicious, wouldn't it? Well, no, not to Keith. At least he'd made a good choice of spouse in that Keith didn't seem likely to suspect. He hoped. But he was still conflicted, a knot of nerves. He'd grown used to being able to talk about his feelings to his earnest partner: one of the few people he's ever been able to speak to about his feelings. Things had changed today. Keith touched his hair and clasped his hand, and for a single, mad moment, Yuri wanted to unburden himself and tell him everything. But that would truly be madness. Keith wouldn't understand, would leave him. Instead, Yuri leaned forward and kissed him.]
[Their honeymoon was something that Keith was looking forward to as well, but it wasn't something that he would press for if his partner wasn't ready for it. He knew how busy both of their lives were and he knew that he'd just dropped a bombshell on Yuri so they would both need a little time to think about what they wanted to do about their new situation. He was more than willing to let it drop for the sake of his love, or until the timing was better. There was also the fact that he had the other man so close to him, it was closer than they had been in days...and his lips. Keith felt fortunate in the knowledge that he had of how soft and generous those lips could be. He was proud of the fact that he knew the judge in a way that no one else did...not that he went around bragging, but he certainly could.]
[Maybe he could forget for a little while. He knew he was no good at forgetting generally, but at least he could try.
It was just his luck that this man he'd chosen to be with, after being alone for so long, had turned out to be a Hero. It was as if fate was mocking him, as irrational a thought as that was. Although it wasn't so different from working for Hero TV, just another connection he had with them, another way to manipulate them--
No, not yet. He just wanted to be with Keith now, as himself. Not to think about other, upsetting things. One of the things he most liked about Keith was the way the man made him feel almost normal, for brief snatches of time. He doesn't want to lose that. He deepens the kiss, moving even closer, until his body presses against his partner's and he can feel his warmth.]
And yes, I want to know everything about you. [Even though he wasn't planning on returning the favor anytime soon, he did want to know.] Every simple story.
[Yuri sighed, relaxing into Keith's touch as he was held closer. Keith's thoughts about goodness were somehow charming. Here was someone who would never sin, would never need to be cleansed.] That wasn't exactly what I meant. What you want is something good that can't be attained. As you told me moments ago, perfection's impossible. It's good to strive for it, but you shouldn't chastise yourself if you can't achieve it. What I mean is that I sometimes feel a sense of doubt. That I'm good at all. [Sometimes, when his father comes to him, but he can't talk about that. He shouldn't be talking about even this much, but Keith feels so warm and comforting, and he's tired after the long night. He's never confided in anyone like this before, but then, he's never been married before.]
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[The fact that Yuri was relaxed and calm in his arms drove home just how much Keith was missing him] Well...I can think of something good, Yuri...I love you and you feel the same, so...so if you have doubts...then you know that...love is a good thing [Keith didn't know what had happened to make Yuri feel this way, but he hoped that having this one thing in his life would change his mind.]
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Love. [As odd as it was, that was true.] Yes. [Love makes him wary. The people he loves betray him, leave him--but Keith hasn't yet, except for this new information which isn't exactly a betrayal, more of an accident. Yuri had never thought he would have something like this, someone to love him. He leaned into Keith's touch, reaching out to find Keith's hand with his own.] I do return your feeling. [It's still hard for him to say it.]
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Yes. [The NEXT parroted, carefully brushing his lover's hair from his eyes with the tip of his nose, enjoying this degree of closeness that allowed him to inhale the scent of his lover, his soap, his shampoo...he was refreshing and warm. When Yuri's fingers found his own he instinctively wound their hands together. He knew that it was hard for his lover to speak what he was really feeling sometimes, but Keith didn't need to hear the words repeated back to him, he knew how the other man felt. There were other ways for him to feel Yuri's love.] Will you kiss me?
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I'll make the time, Keith, though I can't tell you when until I've done some rearranging. It might take a little while, but I will. I am important to others, but our partnership is important, too.
[Otherwise it would seem suspicious, wouldn't it? Well, no, not to Keith. At least he'd made a good choice of spouse in that Keith didn't seem likely to suspect. He hoped. But he was still conflicted, a knot of nerves. He'd grown used to being able to talk about his feelings to his earnest partner: one of the few people he's ever been able to speak to about his feelings. Things had changed today. Keith touched his hair and clasped his hand, and for a single, mad moment, Yuri wanted to unburden himself and tell him everything. But that would truly be madness. Keith wouldn't understand, would leave him. Instead, Yuri leaned forward and kissed him.]
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It was just his luck that this man he'd chosen to be with, after being alone for so long, had turned out to be a Hero. It was as if fate was mocking him, as irrational a thought as that was. Although it wasn't so different from working for Hero TV, just another connection he had with them, another way to manipulate them--
No, not yet. He just wanted to be with Keith now, as himself. Not to think about other, upsetting things. One of the things he most liked about Keith was the way the man made him feel almost normal, for brief snatches of time. He doesn't want to lose that. He deepens the kiss, moving even closer, until his body presses against his partner's and he can feel his warmth.]
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