&another
i d e n t i f y [29 Aug 2003|10:53pm]
to be canceled
to be forgotten
to be muted
to be sophisticated
to be worthless
to be senseless
to be resolute
to be understood
to be gathered
to be adjusted
to be serenaded
to be medicated
to be cut
to be killed
to be choked
to be strangled
to be distraught
to be connected
to be dry
to be followed
to be pursued
to be betrayed
to be failed
to be lied to
to be loved
to be fearful
to be natural
to be perfect
to be thoughtless
to be balanced
to be soulful
to be beautiful
to be satisfied
to be desperate
to be ravenous
to be weak
to be powerless
to be normal
[28 Aug 2003|05:01pm]
each pill with a distinct voice waiting for me-- all of them.
trofmoc on dnif ll'uoy
if there were better words i could give you, i would.
if there were better things to give, you'd have them.
there are moments still left for you to experience.
moments for progression. moments for acceptance.
moments to still feel forthcoming.
i had a conversation yesterday, and we discovered
fear is seed of sorrow.
from which the elm grows...
[27 Aug 2003|06:49pm]
[ mood | contemplative ]
[ music | weak & powerless - apc ]
giving these moments,
providing some solace
isn't much to be expected,
but what's come is most precious.
time and hope evade you
to leave you hanging by a thread
most delicate it is,
most delicate we are,
fragile in our own sense of presence
for them perhaps we're figments
they've forgotten, but then again
it's not completely true.
at times we feel more lost than we are
other moments we touch the ground
and think it won't be long
misleading, i can't be angry enough.
still there's more than juss this sorrow,
someday we'll look forward to tomorrow
but for now juss be comfortable
i'll scribble down these lullabies, for you.
can't keep the mystery inside, i must inquire: [26 Aug 2003|11:09pm]
she won't talk to me.
guess he's taken my place for the moment.
i did the same thing for awhile. juss feels,
at times, that they listen better.
i said something wrong... must have.
otherwise i'd get a return phone call,
but nothing. there is no ringing, juss silence.
*looks at the floor* i know better,
juss keep my mouth shut, always.
keep thoughts to myself. but then,
they ask, they want to know...
then you tell them, and then they...
don't want to hear it... or they do,
but they don't want to believe it.
i.. i don't know. i want some coffee,
but i need to sleep.
if there's one piece of advice: [17 Aug 2003|08:26pm]
you have to do things for yourself, you can't depend on anyone to help you out. help is a luxury, dependable people are as well. you've got to find your own way, no one can do it for you. it's necessary. there isn't always a guiding hand or light. the path is dim, the tunnel is dark. you've got to make your own light, make your own fire. expect no one to help you. just find your own way. you've got to do things for yourself.
to be canceled
to be forgotten
to be muted
to be sophisticated
to be worthless
to be senseless
to be resolute
to be understood
to be gathered
to be adjusted
to be serenaded
to be medicated
to be cut
to be killed
to be choked
to be strangled
to be distraught
to be connected
to be dry
to be followed
to be pursued
to be betrayed
to be failed
to be lied to
to be loved
to be fearful
to be natural
to be perfect
to be thoughtless
to be balanced
to be soulful
to be beautiful
to be satisfied
to be desperate
to be ravenous
to be weak
to be powerless
to be normal
[28 Aug 2003|05:01pm]
each pill with a distinct voice waiting for me-- all of them.
trofmoc on dnif ll'uoy
if there were better words i could give you, i would.
if there were better things to give, you'd have them.
there are moments still left for you to experience.
moments for progression. moments for acceptance.
moments to still feel forthcoming.
i had a conversation yesterday, and we discovered
fear is seed of sorrow.
from which the elm grows...
[27 Aug 2003|06:49pm]
[ mood | contemplative ]
[ music | weak & powerless - apc ]
giving these moments,
providing some solace
isn't much to be expected,
but what's come is most precious.
time and hope evade you
to leave you hanging by a thread
most delicate it is,
most delicate we are,
fragile in our own sense of presence
for them perhaps we're figments
they've forgotten, but then again
it's not completely true.
at times we feel more lost than we are
other moments we touch the ground
and think it won't be long
misleading, i can't be angry enough.
still there's more than juss this sorrow,
someday we'll look forward to tomorrow
but for now juss be comfortable
i'll scribble down these lullabies, for you.
can't keep the mystery inside, i must inquire: [26 Aug 2003|11:09pm]
she won't talk to me.
guess he's taken my place for the moment.
i did the same thing for awhile. juss feels,
at times, that they listen better.
i said something wrong... must have.
otherwise i'd get a return phone call,
but nothing. there is no ringing, juss silence.
*looks at the floor* i know better,
juss keep my mouth shut, always.
keep thoughts to myself. but then,
they ask, they want to know...
then you tell them, and then they...
don't want to hear it... or they do,
but they don't want to believe it.
i.. i don't know. i want some coffee,
but i need to sleep.
if there's one piece of advice: [17 Aug 2003|08:26pm]
you have to do things for yourself, you can't depend on anyone to help you out. help is a luxury, dependable people are as well. you've got to find your own way, no one can do it for you. it's necessary. there isn't always a guiding hand or light. the path is dim, the tunnel is dark. you've got to make your own light, make your own fire. expect no one to help you. just find your own way. you've got to do things for yourself.