Smother (Oneshot)
A/N: The reason as to why I wrote this fic is, because a few years back when Super Junior just debuted a lot of people were always going on about how weird and out of the loop Yesung was. No one appreciated him, and tons of people wrote cruel fanfics about him that just weren't right. And they didn't write them to write them, they sincerely didn't like him. Which is where the inspiration for this piece came along - sometimes it's hard to notice the pain you cause others, if you haven't experienced it yourself. >.<
Because I wanted this fic to be as raw as possible and touch your hearts, it's very roughly done, and no were near as elegant as my usual fics and other pieces are. Please take that into consideration when you're reading. And of course as always, please review!
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Title: Smother (Oneshot)
Rating: PG
Genre: Angst, Slice of Life
Pairings: ninja Yewook
Summary: At the end of the day, Super Junior didn't have a place for Yesung.
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"He's so weird." A voice murmured.
"How can they stand being around him?"
"Doesn't he give them the creeps?" Another added.
Yesung swallowed the lump in his throat, the smile on his face becoming more strained as he passed through the SM Entertainment dressing room.
Various SM singers were sprawled around, sipping on bottles of water and adding the final touches to their outfits.
The 2010 Dream Concert was the event of the year. Everyone who was anyone showed up with the promise of a mind-blowing performance.
He glanced out of the corner of his eyes, noticing the SNSD member's eyeing him wearily from behind their compacts.
His heart tightened at the disgusted looks Tiffany and Jessica shot his way.
He knew he wasn't normal; maybe he could be considered weird, but was he really that off? Was he really that disgusting to them?
He ignored the pain in his chest, slipping into a black armchair next to a sleeping Kyuhyun and Donghae. He noticed Heechul and Kangin sitting next to each other, cracking jokes and in short, causing mayhem.
"Hyung!" An excited voice exclaimed.
Yesung looked up to see Ryeowook running his way.
"Hyung! Hyung! Guess what?!" He demanded, throwing his arms around his neck.
His eyes were shining in clear delight, and a sweet smile was plastered across his face. There was a folder of sheets tucked under his arm, and he was now wearing the white stage clothes.
Yesung glanced fleetingly at the corner of the room where Tiffany and Jessica were scrunching up their nose in distaste.
Yesung looked back at Ryeowook, holding back tears.
"Wh-what is it Wookie?!" He asked him softly, a tremor in his voice.
Ryeowook frowned, the light dying from his eyes.
"Hyung? Is everything alright?" Ryewoook asked concerned.
"Yeah." Yesung lied easily. "Everything's fine. Umm…I'll be right back. I'm going to go grab something to eat before the show." He mumbled.
He pried Ryeowook's arms from his neck, walking around the eternal magnae to the door.
He was only two steps away when it flung open on its own, resulting in a collision with the manager of DBSK and what appeared to be cases of hot pasta. He fell flat on his back, the sticky sauce staining his white clothing and pieces of noodles falling into his hair.
The room became incredibly silent as all the artists turned to look at him. The silence only lasted a mere few seconds as they fell into a round of giggles and high pitched laughs. Out of the corner of his eye Yesung could Ryeowook walking his way, his eyebrows knitted in worry and the frown still present on his face.
"Sorry." He quickly mumbled, brushing past the manager, and practically flying down the hall to get away from the voices - to get away from the noise. He didn't want to hear them. He didn't want to face the facts.
He ran outside, into the back alleyway of the building hosting the event, and curled up against a ruddy brick wall.
He didn't belong.
His heart quenched painfully in his chest, and he shouldered the burden with a heavy ache blooming across his body.
It hurt to breathe, to think, to understand.
But there had been signs. Signs all along pointing him in this very direction.
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"Yesung, Yesung! Come look! We're on TV!" Sungmin squealed, eagerly pointing towards the monitor of the TV situated in their living room. It was replaying their recent debut performance on Music Bank.
Grinning proudly, Yesung took a seat on the couch, watching the video with wide anticipating eyes.
He had finally done it. He had finally obtained the dream the dream - his dream. He had made his mother proud.
The performance started, and several other members popped out of their rooms and dropped whatever they were doing to join in and watch.
Slowly the light in Yesung's eyes died, eyes eagerly sweepiong over the screen, searching for his face.
Finally the camera zeroed in on his face, partially blocked by another member dancing on stage.
And just like that the camera view witched back to a different member.
His face fell.
He was only on for seven seconds.
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The line was intimidating, and Yesung politely excused himself to go to the bathroom and freshen up - code for pulling himself together and quelling his nervousness.
Taking a good look at himself in the mirror hanging up on the bathroom wall, Yesung steeled his face.
He could do this.
How could totally do this.
He had to do this - for the fans.
He smiled at the thought.
He was going to do it.
Pleased with his decision, he gave his hands a quick wash before walking out of the bathroom, back to the table set up for the signing event. He blinked in surprise when he noticed his pathway was blocked by a line of fans, stretching from one side of the road to the other.
The numbers were shocking.
Tentaively Yesung moved forward to make a break through the chain and head back to his seat, and coincidentally bumped into a young girl with double lidded and narrowed eyes.
"What the fuck is your problem, man?" She hissed.
Yesung felt the color drain from his face. "Sorry, I didn't mean -"
"Get in line you cheat."
He stared at her with astonishment. "Excuse me?"
"I said get in line. You're not the only fan wanting to see Super Junior," She growled. She looked livid.
:I'm not a fan." Yesung stuttered out. "I'm -"
"Who are you?" Another equally enraged fan asked. She was standing behind him and pushed his back insistently, driving him clean out of the line.
"Yesung - Kim Yesung. I'm a member of Super Junior." He explained. His head hurt from the force of the shove.
"You're part of the group?" A fan asked suspiciously.
He noded his head yes
"Gosh, some people are so pathetic. Saying stupid lies like this to cut in front of us," The girl from earlier spat out.
She offered him a nasty gesture, as did the other girl he had upset, and then the two merrily went back to waiting in line for their turn.
Yesung swallowed the lump in hiw throat, and when he looked out into the sea of fans he noticed, not a single one of them were holding up a poster of him.
'Who are you?'
No one.
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"Umma! Appa! Grandma!" Yesung sang, husky voice snagging in the air. He pushed open the familiar door to the coffee shop, smile faltering at the sight.
There was broken glass layering the ground, tableds up turned, chairs broken and sliced through.
It was a mess - a break in.
He heard a muffled sob and looked to the side. He saw his mother and father, lost in an embrace and wiping away their tears. Behind them seated at one of the righted tables was his grandmother, her own face and cries hidden in her palms.
And then there was that message, sprawled across the wall behind his grandmother, inked in a red paint as red and as thick as blood.
'Leave.'
The bag of cake he had bought for his parents in celebration for the opening of their quaint little coffee shop, fell to the ground, his body trembling in time to the crash.
He fell to his knees and sobbed.
Why, why him?
Why his family?
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The door of leading from the building to the alley burst open, and there stood a quivering and worried Kim Ryewook.
He took one look at Yesung's state and frowned, concern filling his face.
He crouched down to the Yesung's level and cupped his cheek.
"Oh, Yesung," He whispered.
Yesung bawled, anguished cries wracking his body, and gently Ryewook pulled him to his chest, wrapping loving arms around his teammate.
Yesung only cried harder and the truth of the matter burned in his chest.
Super Junior didn't have a place for someone like Yesung.
Because I wanted this fic to be as raw as possible and touch your hearts, it's very roughly done, and no were near as elegant as my usual fics and other pieces are. Please take that into consideration when you're reading. And of course as always, please review!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Title: Smother (Oneshot)
Rating: PG
Genre: Angst, Slice of Life
Pairings: ninja Yewook
Summary: At the end of the day, Super Junior didn't have a place for Yesung.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"He's so weird." A voice murmured.
"How can they stand being around him?"
"Doesn't he give them the creeps?" Another added.
Yesung swallowed the lump in his throat, the smile on his face becoming more strained as he passed through the SM Entertainment dressing room.
Various SM singers were sprawled around, sipping on bottles of water and adding the final touches to their outfits.
The 2010 Dream Concert was the event of the year. Everyone who was anyone showed up with the promise of a mind-blowing performance.
He glanced out of the corner of his eyes, noticing the SNSD member's eyeing him wearily from behind their compacts.
His heart tightened at the disgusted looks Tiffany and Jessica shot his way.
He knew he wasn't normal; maybe he could be considered weird, but was he really that off? Was he really that disgusting to them?
He ignored the pain in his chest, slipping into a black armchair next to a sleeping Kyuhyun and Donghae. He noticed Heechul and Kangin sitting next to each other, cracking jokes and in short, causing mayhem.
"Hyung!" An excited voice exclaimed.
Yesung looked up to see Ryeowook running his way.
"Hyung! Hyung! Guess what?!" He demanded, throwing his arms around his neck.
His eyes were shining in clear delight, and a sweet smile was plastered across his face. There was a folder of sheets tucked under his arm, and he was now wearing the white stage clothes.
Yesung glanced fleetingly at the corner of the room where Tiffany and Jessica were scrunching up their nose in distaste.
Yesung looked back at Ryeowook, holding back tears.
"Wh-what is it Wookie?!" He asked him softly, a tremor in his voice.
Ryeowook frowned, the light dying from his eyes.
"Hyung? Is everything alright?" Ryewoook asked concerned.
"Yeah." Yesung lied easily. "Everything's fine. Umm…I'll be right back. I'm going to go grab something to eat before the show." He mumbled.
He pried Ryeowook's arms from his neck, walking around the eternal magnae to the door.
He was only two steps away when it flung open on its own, resulting in a collision with the manager of DBSK and what appeared to be cases of hot pasta. He fell flat on his back, the sticky sauce staining his white clothing and pieces of noodles falling into his hair.
The room became incredibly silent as all the artists turned to look at him. The silence only lasted a mere few seconds as they fell into a round of giggles and high pitched laughs. Out of the corner of his eye Yesung could Ryeowook walking his way, his eyebrows knitted in worry and the frown still present on his face.
"Sorry." He quickly mumbled, brushing past the manager, and practically flying down the hall to get away from the voices - to get away from the noise. He didn't want to hear them. He didn't want to face the facts.
He ran outside, into the back alleyway of the building hosting the event, and curled up against a ruddy brick wall.
He didn't belong.
His heart quenched painfully in his chest, and he shouldered the burden with a heavy ache blooming across his body.
It hurt to breathe, to think, to understand.
But there had been signs. Signs all along pointing him in this very direction.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Yesung, Yesung! Come look! We're on TV!" Sungmin squealed, eagerly pointing towards the monitor of the TV situated in their living room. It was replaying their recent debut performance on Music Bank.
Grinning proudly, Yesung took a seat on the couch, watching the video with wide anticipating eyes.
He had finally done it. He had finally obtained the dream the dream - his dream. He had made his mother proud.
The performance started, and several other members popped out of their rooms and dropped whatever they were doing to join in and watch.
Slowly the light in Yesung's eyes died, eyes eagerly sweepiong over the screen, searching for his face.
Finally the camera zeroed in on his face, partially blocked by another member dancing on stage.
And just like that the camera view witched back to a different member.
His face fell.
He was only on for seven seconds.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The line was intimidating, and Yesung politely excused himself to go to the bathroom and freshen up - code for pulling himself together and quelling his nervousness.
Taking a good look at himself in the mirror hanging up on the bathroom wall, Yesung steeled his face.
He could do this.
How could totally do this.
He had to do this - for the fans.
He smiled at the thought.
He was going to do it.
Pleased with his decision, he gave his hands a quick wash before walking out of the bathroom, back to the table set up for the signing event. He blinked in surprise when he noticed his pathway was blocked by a line of fans, stretching from one side of the road to the other.
The numbers were shocking.
Tentaively Yesung moved forward to make a break through the chain and head back to his seat, and coincidentally bumped into a young girl with double lidded and narrowed eyes.
"What the fuck is your problem, man?" She hissed.
Yesung felt the color drain from his face. "Sorry, I didn't mean -"
"Get in line you cheat."
He stared at her with astonishment. "Excuse me?"
"I said get in line. You're not the only fan wanting to see Super Junior," She growled. She looked livid.
:I'm not a fan." Yesung stuttered out. "I'm -"
"Who are you?" Another equally enraged fan asked. She was standing behind him and pushed his back insistently, driving him clean out of the line.
"Yesung - Kim Yesung. I'm a member of Super Junior." He explained. His head hurt from the force of the shove.
"You're part of the group?" A fan asked suspiciously.
He noded his head yes
"Gosh, some people are so pathetic. Saying stupid lies like this to cut in front of us," The girl from earlier spat out.
She offered him a nasty gesture, as did the other girl he had upset, and then the two merrily went back to waiting in line for their turn.
Yesung swallowed the lump in hiw throat, and when he looked out into the sea of fans he noticed, not a single one of them were holding up a poster of him.
'Who are you?'
No one.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Umma! Appa! Grandma!" Yesung sang, husky voice snagging in the air. He pushed open the familiar door to the coffee shop, smile faltering at the sight.
There was broken glass layering the ground, tableds up turned, chairs broken and sliced through.
It was a mess - a break in.
He heard a muffled sob and looked to the side. He saw his mother and father, lost in an embrace and wiping away their tears. Behind them seated at one of the righted tables was his grandmother, her own face and cries hidden in her palms.
And then there was that message, sprawled across the wall behind his grandmother, inked in a red paint as red and as thick as blood.
'Leave.'
The bag of cake he had bought for his parents in celebration for the opening of their quaint little coffee shop, fell to the ground, his body trembling in time to the crash.
He fell to his knees and sobbed.
Why, why him?
Why his family?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The door of leading from the building to the alley burst open, and there stood a quivering and worried Kim Ryewook.
He took one look at Yesung's state and frowned, concern filling his face.
He crouched down to the Yesung's level and cupped his cheek.
"Oh, Yesung," He whispered.
Yesung bawled, anguished cries wracking his body, and gently Ryewook pulled him to his chest, wrapping loving arms around his teammate.
Yesung only cried harder and the truth of the matter burned in his chest.
Super Junior didn't have a place for someone like Yesung.