you, who forever elude me.
yours.
And your words caress my cheek with the gentleness
of mist and the breath of rain -
quicken my pulsing heart -
to make me
yours.
---
[You, who never arrived]
rainer maria rilke, trans stephen mitchell
You who never arrived
in my arms, Beloved, who were lost
from the start,
I don't even know what songs
would please you. I have given up trying
to recognize you in the surging wave of the next
moment. All the immense
images in me-- the far-off, deeply-felt landscape,
cities, towers, and bridges, and unsuspected
turns in the path,
and those powerful lands that were once
pulsing with the life of the gods-
all rise within me to mean
you, who forever elude me.
You, Beloved, who are all
the gardens I have ever gazed at,
longing. An open window
in a country house--, and you almost
stepped out, pensive, to meet me.
Streets that I chanced upon,--
you had just walked down them and vanished.
And sometimes, in a shop, the mirrors
were still dizzy with your presence and, startled,
gave back my too-sudden image. Who knows?
perhaps the same bird echoed through both of us
yesterday, seperate, in the evening...
---
so far away, it's growing colder without your love.
why can't you feel me calling your name?
can't break the silence -
it's breaking me.