Answer to meme question #3
Okay so perhaps you have mentioned it before, but what are your religious beliefs? what do you do for a living? and what is your family background?
This one is likely to be very long. At least the religion and possibly the family background parts.
So, what are my religious beliefs? The short answer is, I have none. I tell people I'm spiritual, not religious. I don't prescribe to any specific organized religion. My parents were never overly religious, but were certainly Christian. We never went to church regularly, only Christmas Eve and occasionally Easter. But I was raised to believe in Christian values. When I was going into 7th grade, they decided to pull me out of public school and send me to a Church of Christ private school (Madison Academy). While I'm grateful for most of the education I received there (with the exception of that blurb on creationism in my Biology book) and the fact that I didn't have to physically defend myself day in and day out I didn't care for the "believe what we say or go to hell" teachings about religion. I had to go to Chapel everyday and take Bible class everyday. The older I got, the less I felt like I was fitting into Christianity. In 11th grade, I said "enough!" and with the help of branflake, talked my dad into letting me home school for my senior year. I still went to a Christian private school though (I believe it was Pentecostal, but I can't remember now). We still had chapel every morning and had to do work for Bible credits, but they were much more tolerant than my experience at Madison Academy. I had to do a 20 page research paper to graduate and since I lacked their requirements for Bible credits (Mad. Acad. only counted each year of Bible class as a quarter point while Faith Covenant counted I think as a half point, or maybe even a whole point). The topic I chose, ironically, was "The Bible as a History: Archaeological Facts that Prove Biblical Stories". I got a 98 on grade A (literally) bull plop, BULL PLOP (to quote Homer Simpson)!
So, after I got out of high school, spirituality was still very important to me but I wanted to find something that was true to me, not just something I'd been told to believe. The first place I turned for alternatives to Christianity was to Wicca and just general Paganism. I didn't hold much value in ceremonies or spells, they still felt like remnants of the Church to me. But I found the very naturalistic aspects of the religion intriguing. Respecting nature and integrating yourself to be a part of the natural world around you was very appealing. But again, the older I got and the deeper I researched, the more I felt like it was a venture in rebellion from the Church and still not a fit for me. I still called myself Pagan because I felt it was an all encompassing term that alluded I held values from several belief systems. I remember someone asking me, "So you're pagan? Are you Wiccan, Druid, Hindu, . . .?", naming off several other pagan religions. My only answer was, "yes". I studied Druidism very briefly, but stopped (though I hope to pick it back up one day) when I found out they believe males and females must be separated to be productive in spiritual matters and work situations. I believe it's just the opposite, that male and female are two halves of a whole (and no, I don't necessarily mean physical male and female).
From there, I kind of let my spirituality take a back seat, until one day when I attempted to explain my beliefs to a devout Christian and found myself stumbling over half baked ideals. I realized then that I didn't know what I believed in anymore and I especially didn't know how to articulate my beliefs in an intelligent manner. Especially to someone who believes the Bible is the one truth. A couple of years later, having to write our wedding ceremony, I decided I needed to explore that aspect of me and started writing down what I believed in. Kind of my own doctrine, so to speak. But there was still a lot of searching to be done and still more to come. I believe I'll never stop searching for truth in this life.
Of the ideals I could capture was that there was a divine life force that ran through all things and connected each of us. I could prove this to myself and others through the energy work I've done with people close to me (feeling a physical touch when you're inches away from someone or feeling the flow of energy between two people through the chakras when you are touching someone as if invisible water passes between you). I believe in reincarnation, simply because of experiences I've had in this life and the incessant feeling that parts of me have resided in other forms in other times. I believe this life force never ends. It's not created or destroyed and so once it is released from physical form, it is free to inhabit other physical forms. I no longer believe in an all powerful god, or even in a series of gods, but believe the divine resides within each of us. That this life force itself is the divine. For too long, I feel I've looked externally for the answers when truly they lie within me.
On a whim one day, I decided I wanted to read some of the classical philosophy books we have on the shelf as remnants of Chris' college courses. Incidentally, the first one I chose was the Tao Te Ching. As I've mentioned it before, I was determined to do an 81 day meditation on the piece, not knowing anything about Taoism. The more I read of it and about it, the more I feel it fits me and the beliefs I hashed out for myself. Tao is the life force. And suddenly I make sense. Everything makes sense. During one of my meditation sessions, I slipped into true transcendence for the first time (intentionally) in my life. I can describe it in much the same way Lao Tsu has. Nothingness, no air, no light, no time, just blackness and emptiness, but filled, if that makes sense. I felt as though I was looking behind the world, underneath the surface of all things physical. I felt as though I spent centuries in this place, but in reality, as soon as I arrived and realized where I was, my physical being nagged at me, warning me that my heart was slowing and my breath was weakening and so as fast as I arrived, I departed and was here again. But I wasn't outside of myself, as I had tried to be in almost every other meditation I've attempted. I instead was deep within myself, at the very core of my being. It is a place of awe and truly indescribable. I kept a journal of my thoughts and experiences during this project (and it is still ongoing and I plan to proceed in the same manner). I wrote a detailed account of this experience immediately after it occurred.
I have to say, in the moments of childbirth, my experience there was much the same. I was there in that place of nothingness, behind the world, in the throes of creation as my child was bursting forth from my body and becoming his own entity. Life is truly magical. I've read a book on Tantra which mentioned the "thrice blessed woman". There are three points in our lives when we truly transcend in this manner: when we are born, when we die and when we give birth. It went on to describe orgasm as a similar, kind of "almost there" experience and how with training, it has the potential to be an equally enlightening experience.
There are many other religions, philosophies and belief systems I'd love to explore. And because of that, I'm currently accepting the label, Agnostic. Although it's not adequate in describing how I feel, it does give the connotation that "I don't know" and that's really how I feel about it all. I don't believe I'll ever adopt an organized religion fully enough to call myself by its name. Ultimately, I feel that you can only find your truth if you give all possible answers adequate attention. To add to that, I feel truth is different for each of us. No two paths are the same and I strongly encourage anyone I have influence on to discover his/her own path and follow it. It is how I will teach my son to find his way through this life. Lao Tsu says a good teacher leads with a gentle hand, barely lighting the path for his pupil. It is up to the pupil to find his own way.
What I do for a living is a very simple and short answer: I'm a stay-at-home mom. Chris' job affords me the chance to stay home with Jonah and give him the full attention he needs and deserves. So, my only job right now is to keep our house clean and tidy and take good care of Jonah. I feel very blessed to be able to do this and I really feel it's best for our son as well. While Jonah was an unplanned surprise, our situation fell into place in such a way that we were able to do what we always wanted to do when we finally had a child. We always discussed me staying home for at least the first year, if not until he goes to Kindergarten. Even then, I always wanted to be able to pick him up from school, or at least be here when he gets home.
As for my family background, I was born the youngest child and only daughter of three. My older brothers were 4 and 10 years older than me. My oldest brother, Mike, left home for Army Basic Training when I was 8 (he was 18). While we were never that close due to the age difference, I missed him a lot. He was my protector and after he left, I was at the mercy (or lack thereof) of my brother Jason. We fought a lot growing up, as most kids do (part of why I think an only child is a good thing from a parental standpoint). But as we got older, we became closer and our fighting just calmed to civil bickering. Mike got married when I was 12 to a wonderful woman who really is like a sister to me. She's a middle school music teacher/band director and he's selling and installing closet organizing systems at his sister-in-law's business. They live in Birmingham, AL and have a fantastic little 3 1/2 year old boy. Jason, until recently, was working for UPS in Huntsville, AL and has a wonderful 7 year old son. I, of course, now live in Nashville, TN with my husband Chris and our 15 month old son, Jonah. Chris and I met in the summer of 2000 and were married May 13th, 2006.
My mother died about a month after I turned 14 and the last week of my 8th grade year. It was very unexpected and to this day, we do not know the cause. She had something like an asthma attack one night in late May (incidentally, a line of tornadoes hit that night) and was gasping for breath and complaining she couldn't breathe. My father, feeling ambulances would be tied up with incidents from the weather, rushed her off to the hospital in his truck. She died on the way there, but they revived her once he got her to the ER. She spent a week unconscious in intensive care and finally one evening, the doctor came in and said they had lost all brain waves and she was officially gone. All tests were inconclusive. Not a stroke, not a heart attack, not an asthma attack. They just don't know.
Early in my senior year of high school, my dad met a wonderful lady. About six months later, he proposed to her and they married on his birthday (March 28th) late my senior year. He moved out of our house, leaving Jason and I somewhat on our own (he was still paying all the bills, but we had the house to ourselves). I still had my last month or two of high school to finish up. His new wife, Alicia, really was a sweet lady, but because they married later in my life, it's been difficult for me to think of her as a mother. I felt like I had pretty much been raised before she came into our lives, so I mostly think of her as my father's wife. Finally, now that I've had Jonah, I'm able to call her "grandma" for him. I call her Alicia still though. She has two sons (and yes, I'm still the youngest and only girl). They're both married, (one of them for the second time) and have three kids (well, the one on the second marriage has one on the way to make three for him). They're both police officers and though we don't really have anything in common, we're cordial to each other at gatherings. I lived at home with Jason until 2001 when Chris and I got our first place together. Jason still lives there now with his son.
Going further back:
My mother was from Central Indiana, very near the Ohio border (Richmond, IN). She had just one sibling, an older brother. Her father died when I was about 2 years old. His funeral is one of my first memories. It's obviously tainted by a 2 year old's mind because as I remember it, I was wearing a very pretty, frilly dress, the sun was shining and it was a gorgeous spring day and I was pitching imaginary baseballs to the preacher. Not a bit of the memory is sad and I'm sure I didn't understand what was going on. Her mother is still alive and my last remaining grandparent. She still lives on her own and has plans of living to 100 (she is 88 now). My uncle is kind of one of those irritating guys that you're forced to tolerate. He's arrogant (thinks that because we live in the south we're all ignorant rednecks and he's somehow enlightened for living in the Midwest). He loves Nascar and well, anything car related. He sends chain letters through email, regardless of the fact that I've asked him several times to stop spamming me. He has two kids, a boy and a girl. They're both married now. The boy, Tony, has a three year old daughter, lives in Chicago and is a sports writer, or something like that. My other cousin, Angie, was the one who had a miscarriage at Christmas, lives in LA and is a program director for NPR there. Her husband is this guy (and before you think he's somehow famous he mostly just works in television and second second assistant director is a title given to the guy who makes sure everyone shows up on time and is where they need to be for a shoot and helps position people on a set). My aunt is the sweetest woman you'll ever meet. She's so emotional and tenderhearted, it's hard to believe she wound up with a jerk like my uncle. I always love to see her, but occasions are few and far between. Being tenderhearted, they take in a lot of stray animals and when my uncle comes to visit, she's often the one to stay home to care for them. I'm the youngest of my generation of cousins.
My father is from Southern Ohio. My dad was a farm boy with the mind of an engineer. He was the 11th child of 12 (he has just one younger sister) and was an uncle before he was born. One of his older sisters (actually I think his very oldest sister) was his and his younger sister's 3rd grade teacher. I never visited the farm he grew up on (they raised dairy cows and he has many stories about getting up to milk cows in the mornings and such). But I did visit the farm they lived on in later years which is where one of my aunts still lives. I always loved visiting there. It was such a different experience from what I was used to. They had goats, rabbits, chickens, turkeys, pigs for a while (though not in later years) and peacocks and of course there was the occasional dogs and cats they'd cycle through. I'd help my aunt tend to some of the animals when I was younger. She would show me where they incubated eggs for the chickens. I learned a lot from her really. I really loved my aunt Sis (so called because she was named Edna after their mom, so they called her Sis to differentiate). She was an artist, as well as a farmer and I always wanted to be like her. She always had little wooden cutouts and acrylic paints around. She'd give me some things to paint when I'd come to visit. She'd watch Bob Ross and do canvas paintings like his, but in acrylic instead of oil. I remember when I decided to tell her how much I enjoyed painting with her she gave me the warmest smile. By the time I could remember my dad's mom, she had already had two strokes and had to use a walker to get around. She only sat in one chair all day long. In the mornings, my aunt would help her get dressed and come out to the living room. In the evenings, she'd help her get ready for bed. I believe she was 85 when she passed away. I think I was about 10 years old (I can't remember exactly). This was the first death I experienced that pained me and made me cry. It was on Easter Sunday, I remember and the next day we packed and drove up for the funeral. My grandfather died just a month or so before I was born. They used to say we passed each other on the way in and out of this world. So, I grew up pretty much never knowing a grandfather. I've lost count of how many cousins I have on this side. I just know I'm the youngest of my generation on this side as well (I want to say I was #36 or so of my generation). I believe there were even a handful of great-great-grandchildren when my grandmother passed away. That was the last time I remember them really tallying it. Now, if I'm the youngest and I have a child, I know some of the older cousins and even middle cousins are probably grandparents, if not great-grandparents by now.
As far as genealogy goes, I know a fair amount has been traced on my Dad's side, but I'm not sure how far and I don't know many specifics. My grandmother's maiden name was Schomberg, which is quite obviously German. There's quite a bit of Irish in there somewhere too (I believe in the form of a Patterson Lineage somewhere) and Moore, which is my maiden name is a Scottish line. Then on my mother's side there's Hamilton and Thomas so most likely some English in there as well. I kind of wish at times that I knew more about my lineage and it may be something I pursue later in life. Chris' dad is really into genealogy and has researched a lot of their lineage and has offered to do what he can for mine as well. Chris' family is mostly German (Lehmann) and apparently there are French Jews in the line as well. His dad actually talked to a living French relative on the phone a couple of years ago.
And there you have it. Might as well be my life story. I probably should have broken that up into a couple of entries really.
This one is likely to be very long. At least the religion and possibly the family background parts.
So, what are my religious beliefs? The short answer is, I have none. I tell people I'm spiritual, not religious. I don't prescribe to any specific organized religion. My parents were never overly religious, but were certainly Christian. We never went to church regularly, only Christmas Eve and occasionally Easter. But I was raised to believe in Christian values. When I was going into 7th grade, they decided to pull me out of public school and send me to a Church of Christ private school (Madison Academy). While I'm grateful for most of the education I received there (with the exception of that blurb on creationism in my Biology book) and the fact that I didn't have to physically defend myself day in and day out I didn't care for the "believe what we say or go to hell" teachings about religion. I had to go to Chapel everyday and take Bible class everyday. The older I got, the less I felt like I was fitting into Christianity. In 11th grade, I said "enough!" and with the help of branflake, talked my dad into letting me home school for my senior year. I still went to a Christian private school though (I believe it was Pentecostal, but I can't remember now). We still had chapel every morning and had to do work for Bible credits, but they were much more tolerant than my experience at Madison Academy. I had to do a 20 page research paper to graduate and since I lacked their requirements for Bible credits (Mad. Acad. only counted each year of Bible class as a quarter point while Faith Covenant counted I think as a half point, or maybe even a whole point). The topic I chose, ironically, was "The Bible as a History: Archaeological Facts that Prove Biblical Stories". I got a 98 on grade A (literally) bull plop, BULL PLOP (to quote Homer Simpson)!
So, after I got out of high school, spirituality was still very important to me but I wanted to find something that was true to me, not just something I'd been told to believe. The first place I turned for alternatives to Christianity was to Wicca and just general Paganism. I didn't hold much value in ceremonies or spells, they still felt like remnants of the Church to me. But I found the very naturalistic aspects of the religion intriguing. Respecting nature and integrating yourself to be a part of the natural world around you was very appealing. But again, the older I got and the deeper I researched, the more I felt like it was a venture in rebellion from the Church and still not a fit for me. I still called myself Pagan because I felt it was an all encompassing term that alluded I held values from several belief systems. I remember someone asking me, "So you're pagan? Are you Wiccan, Druid, Hindu, . . .?", naming off several other pagan religions. My only answer was, "yes". I studied Druidism very briefly, but stopped (though I hope to pick it back up one day) when I found out they believe males and females must be separated to be productive in spiritual matters and work situations. I believe it's just the opposite, that male and female are two halves of a whole (and no, I don't necessarily mean physical male and female).
From there, I kind of let my spirituality take a back seat, until one day when I attempted to explain my beliefs to a devout Christian and found myself stumbling over half baked ideals. I realized then that I didn't know what I believed in anymore and I especially didn't know how to articulate my beliefs in an intelligent manner. Especially to someone who believes the Bible is the one truth. A couple of years later, having to write our wedding ceremony, I decided I needed to explore that aspect of me and started writing down what I believed in. Kind of my own doctrine, so to speak. But there was still a lot of searching to be done and still more to come. I believe I'll never stop searching for truth in this life.
Of the ideals I could capture was that there was a divine life force that ran through all things and connected each of us. I could prove this to myself and others through the energy work I've done with people close to me (feeling a physical touch when you're inches away from someone or feeling the flow of energy between two people through the chakras when you are touching someone as if invisible water passes between you). I believe in reincarnation, simply because of experiences I've had in this life and the incessant feeling that parts of me have resided in other forms in other times. I believe this life force never ends. It's not created or destroyed and so once it is released from physical form, it is free to inhabit other physical forms. I no longer believe in an all powerful god, or even in a series of gods, but believe the divine resides within each of us. That this life force itself is the divine. For too long, I feel I've looked externally for the answers when truly they lie within me.
On a whim one day, I decided I wanted to read some of the classical philosophy books we have on the shelf as remnants of Chris' college courses. Incidentally, the first one I chose was the Tao Te Ching. As I've mentioned it before, I was determined to do an 81 day meditation on the piece, not knowing anything about Taoism. The more I read of it and about it, the more I feel it fits me and the beliefs I hashed out for myself. Tao is the life force. And suddenly I make sense. Everything makes sense. During one of my meditation sessions, I slipped into true transcendence for the first time (intentionally) in my life. I can describe it in much the same way Lao Tsu has. Nothingness, no air, no light, no time, just blackness and emptiness, but filled, if that makes sense. I felt as though I was looking behind the world, underneath the surface of all things physical. I felt as though I spent centuries in this place, but in reality, as soon as I arrived and realized where I was, my physical being nagged at me, warning me that my heart was slowing and my breath was weakening and so as fast as I arrived, I departed and was here again. But I wasn't outside of myself, as I had tried to be in almost every other meditation I've attempted. I instead was deep within myself, at the very core of my being. It is a place of awe and truly indescribable. I kept a journal of my thoughts and experiences during this project (and it is still ongoing and I plan to proceed in the same manner). I wrote a detailed account of this experience immediately after it occurred.
I have to say, in the moments of childbirth, my experience there was much the same. I was there in that place of nothingness, behind the world, in the throes of creation as my child was bursting forth from my body and becoming his own entity. Life is truly magical. I've read a book on Tantra which mentioned the "thrice blessed woman". There are three points in our lives when we truly transcend in this manner: when we are born, when we die and when we give birth. It went on to describe orgasm as a similar, kind of "almost there" experience and how with training, it has the potential to be an equally enlightening experience.
There are many other religions, philosophies and belief systems I'd love to explore. And because of that, I'm currently accepting the label, Agnostic. Although it's not adequate in describing how I feel, it does give the connotation that "I don't know" and that's really how I feel about it all. I don't believe I'll ever adopt an organized religion fully enough to call myself by its name. Ultimately, I feel that you can only find your truth if you give all possible answers adequate attention. To add to that, I feel truth is different for each of us. No two paths are the same and I strongly encourage anyone I have influence on to discover his/her own path and follow it. It is how I will teach my son to find his way through this life. Lao Tsu says a good teacher leads with a gentle hand, barely lighting the path for his pupil. It is up to the pupil to find his own way.
What I do for a living is a very simple and short answer: I'm a stay-at-home mom. Chris' job affords me the chance to stay home with Jonah and give him the full attention he needs and deserves. So, my only job right now is to keep our house clean and tidy and take good care of Jonah. I feel very blessed to be able to do this and I really feel it's best for our son as well. While Jonah was an unplanned surprise, our situation fell into place in such a way that we were able to do what we always wanted to do when we finally had a child. We always discussed me staying home for at least the first year, if not until he goes to Kindergarten. Even then, I always wanted to be able to pick him up from school, or at least be here when he gets home.
As for my family background, I was born the youngest child and only daughter of three. My older brothers were 4 and 10 years older than me. My oldest brother, Mike, left home for Army Basic Training when I was 8 (he was 18). While we were never that close due to the age difference, I missed him a lot. He was my protector and after he left, I was at the mercy (or lack thereof) of my brother Jason. We fought a lot growing up, as most kids do (part of why I think an only child is a good thing from a parental standpoint). But as we got older, we became closer and our fighting just calmed to civil bickering. Mike got married when I was 12 to a wonderful woman who really is like a sister to me. She's a middle school music teacher/band director and he's selling and installing closet organizing systems at his sister-in-law's business. They live in Birmingham, AL and have a fantastic little 3 1/2 year old boy. Jason, until recently, was working for UPS in Huntsville, AL and has a wonderful 7 year old son. I, of course, now live in Nashville, TN with my husband Chris and our 15 month old son, Jonah. Chris and I met in the summer of 2000 and were married May 13th, 2006.
My mother died about a month after I turned 14 and the last week of my 8th grade year. It was very unexpected and to this day, we do not know the cause. She had something like an asthma attack one night in late May (incidentally, a line of tornadoes hit that night) and was gasping for breath and complaining she couldn't breathe. My father, feeling ambulances would be tied up with incidents from the weather, rushed her off to the hospital in his truck. She died on the way there, but they revived her once he got her to the ER. She spent a week unconscious in intensive care and finally one evening, the doctor came in and said they had lost all brain waves and she was officially gone. All tests were inconclusive. Not a stroke, not a heart attack, not an asthma attack. They just don't know.
Early in my senior year of high school, my dad met a wonderful lady. About six months later, he proposed to her and they married on his birthday (March 28th) late my senior year. He moved out of our house, leaving Jason and I somewhat on our own (he was still paying all the bills, but we had the house to ourselves). I still had my last month or two of high school to finish up. His new wife, Alicia, really was a sweet lady, but because they married later in my life, it's been difficult for me to think of her as a mother. I felt like I had pretty much been raised before she came into our lives, so I mostly think of her as my father's wife. Finally, now that I've had Jonah, I'm able to call her "grandma" for him. I call her Alicia still though. She has two sons (and yes, I'm still the youngest and only girl). They're both married, (one of them for the second time) and have three kids (well, the one on the second marriage has one on the way to make three for him). They're both police officers and though we don't really have anything in common, we're cordial to each other at gatherings. I lived at home with Jason until 2001 when Chris and I got our first place together. Jason still lives there now with his son.
Going further back:
My mother was from Central Indiana, very near the Ohio border (Richmond, IN). She had just one sibling, an older brother. Her father died when I was about 2 years old. His funeral is one of my first memories. It's obviously tainted by a 2 year old's mind because as I remember it, I was wearing a very pretty, frilly dress, the sun was shining and it was a gorgeous spring day and I was pitching imaginary baseballs to the preacher. Not a bit of the memory is sad and I'm sure I didn't understand what was going on. Her mother is still alive and my last remaining grandparent. She still lives on her own and has plans of living to 100 (she is 88 now). My uncle is kind of one of those irritating guys that you're forced to tolerate. He's arrogant (thinks that because we live in the south we're all ignorant rednecks and he's somehow enlightened for living in the Midwest). He loves Nascar and well, anything car related. He sends chain letters through email, regardless of the fact that I've asked him several times to stop spamming me. He has two kids, a boy and a girl. They're both married now. The boy, Tony, has a three year old daughter, lives in Chicago and is a sports writer, or something like that. My other cousin, Angie, was the one who had a miscarriage at Christmas, lives in LA and is a program director for NPR there. Her husband is this guy (and before you think he's somehow famous he mostly just works in television and second second assistant director is a title given to the guy who makes sure everyone shows up on time and is where they need to be for a shoot and helps position people on a set). My aunt is the sweetest woman you'll ever meet. She's so emotional and tenderhearted, it's hard to believe she wound up with a jerk like my uncle. I always love to see her, but occasions are few and far between. Being tenderhearted, they take in a lot of stray animals and when my uncle comes to visit, she's often the one to stay home to care for them. I'm the youngest of my generation of cousins.
My father is from Southern Ohio. My dad was a farm boy with the mind of an engineer. He was the 11th child of 12 (he has just one younger sister) and was an uncle before he was born. One of his older sisters (actually I think his very oldest sister) was his and his younger sister's 3rd grade teacher. I never visited the farm he grew up on (they raised dairy cows and he has many stories about getting up to milk cows in the mornings and such). But I did visit the farm they lived on in later years which is where one of my aunts still lives. I always loved visiting there. It was such a different experience from what I was used to. They had goats, rabbits, chickens, turkeys, pigs for a while (though not in later years) and peacocks and of course there was the occasional dogs and cats they'd cycle through. I'd help my aunt tend to some of the animals when I was younger. She would show me where they incubated eggs for the chickens. I learned a lot from her really. I really loved my aunt Sis (so called because she was named Edna after their mom, so they called her Sis to differentiate). She was an artist, as well as a farmer and I always wanted to be like her. She always had little wooden cutouts and acrylic paints around. She'd give me some things to paint when I'd come to visit. She'd watch Bob Ross and do canvas paintings like his, but in acrylic instead of oil. I remember when I decided to tell her how much I enjoyed painting with her she gave me the warmest smile. By the time I could remember my dad's mom, she had already had two strokes and had to use a walker to get around. She only sat in one chair all day long. In the mornings, my aunt would help her get dressed and come out to the living room. In the evenings, she'd help her get ready for bed. I believe she was 85 when she passed away. I think I was about 10 years old (I can't remember exactly). This was the first death I experienced that pained me and made me cry. It was on Easter Sunday, I remember and the next day we packed and drove up for the funeral. My grandfather died just a month or so before I was born. They used to say we passed each other on the way in and out of this world. So, I grew up pretty much never knowing a grandfather. I've lost count of how many cousins I have on this side. I just know I'm the youngest of my generation on this side as well (I want to say I was #36 or so of my generation). I believe there were even a handful of great-great-grandchildren when my grandmother passed away. That was the last time I remember them really tallying it. Now, if I'm the youngest and I have a child, I know some of the older cousins and even middle cousins are probably grandparents, if not great-grandparents by now.
As far as genealogy goes, I know a fair amount has been traced on my Dad's side, but I'm not sure how far and I don't know many specifics. My grandmother's maiden name was Schomberg, which is quite obviously German. There's quite a bit of Irish in there somewhere too (I believe in the form of a Patterson Lineage somewhere) and Moore, which is my maiden name is a Scottish line. Then on my mother's side there's Hamilton and Thomas so most likely some English in there as well. I kind of wish at times that I knew more about my lineage and it may be something I pursue later in life. Chris' dad is really into genealogy and has researched a lot of their lineage and has offered to do what he can for mine as well. Chris' family is mostly German (Lehmann) and apparently there are French Jews in the line as well. His dad actually talked to a living French relative on the phone a couple of years ago.
And there you have it. Might as well be my life story. I probably should have broken that up into a couple of entries really.