Week 9 literature entry!
Hey everyone,
I recommend that you go and check out some of the suggested LJ on Michael's page as they are really fantastic!
I read Gary's poem and ended up in tears.I love when writing reflects on one's personal experience
and the emotional truth is so raw it immediately triggers something inside of you!
Here it is....and underneath are my comments to Gary..
My Poem
I never knew my father well
he was allways there, as if i could tell
his brutality was an inhearted one
passed on & on from father to son
he worked hard night and day
at least thats what he would say
to put some food on our plate
but all I needed was a freind a mate
the things he gave me were important ones
lessons of life that seemed so dumb
he never looked in side of me
to see the things that i could see
a life of youth with reason to fight
but never quite finding that distant light
Your stupid stupid stupid & dumb
thats what I;ve got for a son
a boy within with mistakes to make
with opening eyes and a world to take
venturing out to the world around
with a narrow vission too what I found
Anger,Darkness,Envy and Greed
your gift to me your life your seed
his brutality was an inherted one
passed on &on from father to son
your stupid stupid stupid dumb
thats what I;ve got for a son
my teenage years for I;m nearly a man
responsability I accept the best I can
lessons in life I could have been tought
well at least you would have thought
Instead I strugle to learn them right
asI try to stay on track,looking in to the light
It gets harder and harder to stay on track
selfesteem and guidance are the things I lack
I stumble and fall I feel like a burden
I feel in myself i realy am hurting
A negative thought the first one im feeling
from the rest of the world i must be concealing
your stupid stupid stupid dumb
thats what I;ve got for a son
well thats it he must be right
and I have lost the will to fight
I thought I had a tallent somewhere
something to give something to share
but I was misslead confused decived
that my tallent would shine If I belived
now my feelings are down to three
Anger,Hate & stupidity
untill this time my feelings were strong
that fait was pulling me along
I had a place a meaning a future
but now I know Im only a dreamer
this thing I inherated at my birth
is in my mind the thing thats first
stupid stupid stupid dumb
thats what I;ve got for a son
well now I,m older and wiser as well
my future is brighter as far as I can tell
Im smarter & stronger and the guidance I lacked
Ive found for myself and Ive taken it back
selfesteem wasn,t on your list
one of the important things that you missed
Iwas stupid and ridiculed beaten and brocken
held on my bed turning blue from a chocking
the wrongs I have commited in my life
will be payed by me x trice
so if that punishment fits the crime
I will always be able to pay in time
this thing I inherited at my birth was moulded
and foulded by you at first
Your stupid stupid stupid dumb
I,m your creation thats what youv,e done
This was a fantastic poem!
Congrats! You have captured your thoughts and feelings in such a creative way.
You had me in tears throughout the poem but you also gave me a sense of hope at the end of the poem.
You should be very proud of your work and I hope that you continue you write poetry.
Thanks for sharing this with everyone.