[meta] on writing smut
I was going to post recs to the sujukinkmeme but do you guys really care? I would've pretty much just linked all the Qmi and Zhou Mi-centric fics, and the two fics about Kibum's arms of sex, and the epic, completely amazing ShiChul crossdressing thing (omg so much good porn *__*) BUT YOU GUYS HAVE READ THEM ALL ALREADY, RIGHT? ::stares meaningfully::
Then I thought maybe I should talk about the Pajama Party MV (cute!) or SJM on Bravely Going Forward (LOLOLOLOLOL OMFG ::MARRIES SJM & TEACHER HE::).
Then I considered making a post to whore for things for my birthday (keep this in mind: I like fic. I like KiHae. I like QMi.) but that fell through too.
So what the hell is this post actually about?
Well, I've been thinking about making a meta post about writing smut for a long time, but I'm lazy and it involved too much TMI about my own kinks (let me list them for you, on and on and on...). But while talking to 0sweet_tart0 on GChat, I figured I might as well, since I have nothing better to do (that's a lie, I do, but watch me procrastiante) and I like meta and talking to much and it was a good time, what with sujukinkmeme and all.
So, here, have an epic essay about writing smut.
--
(This post is broken up into very vague sections. I didn't plan the post out before I wrote it, so it's a bit disorganized, sorry. The flow is probably not what it should be or could be.)
Years ago, I read this very helpful post about how to write sex scenes. The author compared it to writing action scenes - description must be offset by action, otherwise it just isn't hot.
To be honest, while it was an interesting read, I don't reference it at all when I write smut. When I write sex scenes (or the groping that leads up to sex because I am too lazy about dedicating long scenes to full penetration), I reference what I know. And what I know is the smut fics I read. So this post is hugely, hugely biased and my opinion only. This is what works for me, in what I read and what I write. I do not claim any of the following as a blanket statement of truth, applicable to anyone but myself (though I think what I say can apply to many others as well). There will be exceptions. There will be people who think I'm just plain wrong. YOUR MILEAGE MAY VARY. With that in mind...
I.
I find that the lines that trigger the most reaction are actually pretty simple and straightfoward. Someone is moving a hand, or someone is drawing in a short, surprised breath. Someone is letting his her skirt ride up (wow, my crossdressing kink, it burns - and will be addressed later), or someone is kissing someone else.
It's the set-up and the reaction of the characters that make the scene flow. I find that I don't react as positively to smut scenes with long run-on sentences that try to build up the tension of the scene in a rush of words that crescendo (simulating the characters' orgasms) in a stream of consciousness that breaks off at the peak.
For example:
Their hands slipped over each other, shuddering, unsure, desperate for any touch of slick skin, and Zhou Mi's leg was between Kyuhyun's, tight and hard and rocking to the rhythm set by their hearts and their gasps as they fell into each other, mouth to mouth, teeth nipping, and Kyuhyun could only hear the ringing in his ears, the dizzying rush of heat and pleasure and slap of skin against skin until the heat built tight in his stomach, rising, rising, and he was poised at a precipice with no return and--oh.
I used to write smut like this. Now I don't, because I realize if I read it, I get too distracted by the stylistics of the language and the structure of the sentence to find it hot. I would rather you give me something straightforward:
Kyuhyun smiled and Zhou Mi's stomach dipped. There was an edge to that smile Zhou Mi hadn't seen before, except in his dreams. Kyuhyun's hand hadn't moved from between his legs during their entire exchange, but now he licked his lips a little and pressed gently. Zhou Mi's shudder was involutary.
This, actually, resonates with the post I linked above. Less description, more action. The pretty language can occasionally be used in heavily-styled, atmospheric-pieces, where the smut may not be the point, but those are the exceptions. And if the smut is not the point, then it's probably not what I'm trying to address in this post. I am rarely a fan of stylistic pieces in general, except for the rare one, and I'm even less of a fan when it comes to smut. I'd like my porn hot, please, not lost under a heavy veil of pretty language.
II.
Actions are hot. Couple this with kinks and your smut will automatically get twice as hot. Keep in mind that kinks don't necessarily have to be over-the-top to be kinky or sexy. Here are some of my favorite (tamer, lol) kinks of boysex:
--vertical surface slamming (e.g., door, wall, whatever)
--ties, suits
--collarbones, neck
--public, semi-public places (e.g., handjobs during a press conference or on the public subway, sex in a closet, blowjob in a restaurant or a bathroom, etc.)
--possessiveness
--teeth (that mark or drag just a little during a blowjob)
--crossdressing (this is new to me, thank you very much, Super Junior fandom)
Incorporate things like this (that you like, or that you know other people like) and your smutty scene is automatically hot! There doesn't need to be a full description of anal sex. There doesn't even need to be a full description of a blowjob, because hotness can be all built up in the foreplay, or contained in a sentence or two.
III.
Brevity can be your friend. Some of the hottest fics I've read spent, literally, about two short paragraphs describing the sex act. The rest of the hotness came from building up their sexual tension, rampant sexual frustration, and generally a lot of teasing, both of the characters and of the reader. I actually tend to find that sex scenes that take pages end up boring me, and I will scroll down because it's really all the same. My attention span is short, and if you've read one explicit sex scene, you've read them all. I typically will not find paragraphs of text describing sex nearly as hot as one or two good lines in a PG-13 or R fic. But maybe I just have no attention span, like I said.
So the point is you shouldn't worry too much about description. Again, the emphasis is on action. You want to dwell on how hot Kyuhyun looks with the first few buttons of his shirt gaping open and his collarbone peeking out? Mention it, then make Zhou Mi react to it. Make him do something about it, or make something interrupt them; just make something happen. Maybe you want to describe how Kyuhyun's voice breaks when Zhou Mi thrusts two fingers into him. I'd suggest this:
Zhou Mi finally lifts his head away from Kyuhyun's cock, much to Kyuhyun's displeasure. He opens his mouth to protest, but a sharp, shocked little cry escapes him instead - Zhou Mi has slipped a finger into him. Kyuhyun wriggles, arches his back, and pants, "Move."
over this:
Zhou Mi lets Kyuhyun's cock fall from his mouth, damp and swollen red, as Kyuhyun thrashes on the bed in displeasure. He opens his mouth to protest, glaring, but Zhou Mi's hand falls between his legs and suddenly there is a long, slender digit probing at Kyuhyun's entrance. A sharp, shocked little cry escapes Kyuhyun as the tip of the finger slides in, teasing, and he sees Zhou Mi grinning.
"Fuck you," Kyuhyun pants, but he's desperate for more, and the way he moves against the bed is proof of that. Zhou Mi's grin widens and his finger slides in deeper, and Kyuhyun arches his back when it finally brushes that sensitive spot.
"Please," he begs, changing his tune. "Please. Move."
There's really nothing wrong with the second example except that I just spent three paragraphs on one thing: Zhou Mi sliding one finger into Kyuhyun. Picture that multiplied by another fifty minute acts during sex, such as kissing, teasing a nipple, or feathering ticklish touches along the backside of Zhou Mi's knee, or Kyuhyun giving Zhou Mi a blowjob (though that'd take, like, five to eight paragraphs at least). That's one epic sex scene, you guys. Sometimes it's worth it because sometimes it comes out an excruciatingly hot sex scene that everyone is glad is so long. Most of the time, though, my eyes glaze over. I'd like the plot back. And if it's a one-shot PWP, then it had better be some damn good writing if it's going to keep me engaged in this one act from beginning to end.
It's the same as writing a one-shot all set in one scene (whether it is one moment in the rain, or one moment of heartbreak, or realization, whatever) - it needs to be especially well written to make that one scene mean something. If you lose the reader's interest before the end, you're screwed, because you've got nothing going on after.
If there's plot going on, then you've got to make the sex hot enough to keep the reader's interest, to make sure they aren't skimming over it or skipping it altogether to find out what happens next. Sex that happens for a reason is especially lovely. Sometimes gratuitous sex is nice, but that kind of sex put into a plotty fic will be, well, really obvious, sort of jarring, and sometimes skipped.
IV.
Another thing: characterization. It is essential. No matter how good your smut is, if the words coming out of the characters' mouths seems entirely out of character, I will like your fic less. Your smut will automatically be downgraded at least a little bit. Characterizaton matters in porn, because I chose to read this smutty fic for this pairing because I like the two characters and I think it would be hot if they got it on. If you fuck up their characterizations, then it's not them getting it on, and it's no longer as hot.
Of course creative license allows for, well, creativity, but there's got to be a foundation of believability. You will get called on OOC-ness if you change an aspect of a character's personality without justifying it or explaining it. Zhou Mi, for instance, will not be randomly abusive and like hurting Kyuhyun just for the sake of hurting him. No, wtf. Having him be more aggressive (lol he's afraid of small bugs) or curse more might be sold more believably to the reader, however, if done right. (Though a whiny and bossy and slightly mischievous but very, very easy Zhou Mi is what I see most in my head.)
V.
It's okay to use the word cock. I prefer it most. Dick is a little cruder, and I'm less of a fan, but it works if you're trying to go for a rougher atmosphere or description of sex, possibly dub-con or non-con. Or just something mutually beneficial but not particuarly emotionally invested. (Again, these are just my opinions; this is how I associate these words, but that doesn't make them indelible facts for other people.) I'm also all right with "arousal" and "erection" or "hardness", depending on how its used. Saying that Zhou Mi's arousal penetrated Kyuhyun's ass sounds a bit wrong, because arousal and erection are descriptions of the state of being of his cock, but are not direct substitutes for that thing that hangs between his legs.
More about cocks: it's also okay the vary the word you use for the tip! The head, the crown, etc. There is a slit. The cock has veins. Then there are the balls/sacs and, oh hey guys, I know it's easy to think that guys are hairless (especially for the pretty boys we like in Kpop), but they're not. There's also hair around the base of the cock. You don't have to mention it (I personally don't find it particularly hot) but you should keep that in mind as you're writing. These are...not girls.
Cocks weeping or leaking are hot, but please do your research before you write smut. Precome (I don't like the word "cum", ever, unless it's Latin) does not shoot from the tip. Neither is semen/come thick and ropey. No. Asses are not self-lubricating; that is why people invented lube. There is so much wank involved in writing smut, especially slash, that I won't get into, but those are some basics. (There is one subject I am absolutely not touching here and that is rape, because that's another two or three essays, oh god.)
To sum up, in smut:
1. actions are as important (if not more) than descriptions
2. kinks are hot (you can deviate from the standard kiss-grope-handjob-sex)
3. brevity can be your friend
4. characterization is key
5. know the basics for boy-on-boy sex (including vocab)
There might be more, but it's late and I just spent about an hour metaing about porn. I mean...wtf. I could've spent that time actually writing porn instead of writing about it. I actually need to go get a life now. ::cries:: In any case, I hope someone found this post useful or at least interesting (my kinks, let me show you them), but if you think I need to stfu, lol sorry. I talk way too much, I know.
Remember, these are my opinions only. You have every right to disagree with them. :)
I saw JJ Lin run as torchbearer for the Olympics earlier on TV. :D JJ Lin, ilusm! ♥ When he came on TV, I nearly fell off the couch because up until then it was all a bunch of middle-aged people I didn't recognize. I fangirled him ("ohmygod he's so cuuuute") and my parents laughed at me. My life.
Then I thought maybe I should talk about the Pajama Party MV (cute!) or SJM on Bravely Going Forward (LOLOLOLOLOL OMFG ::MARRIES SJM & TEACHER HE::).
Then I considered making a post to whore for things for my birthday (keep this in mind: I like fic. I like KiHae. I like QMi.) but that fell through too.
So what the hell is this post actually about?
Well, I've been thinking about making a meta post about writing smut for a long time, but I'm lazy and it involved too much TMI about my own kinks (let me list them for you, on and on and on...). But while talking to 0sweet_tart0 on GChat, I figured I might as well, since I have nothing better to do (that's a lie, I do, but watch me procrastiante) and I like meta and talking to much and it was a good time, what with sujukinkmeme and all.
So, here, have an epic essay about writing smut.
--
(This post is broken up into very vague sections. I didn't plan the post out before I wrote it, so it's a bit disorganized, sorry. The flow is probably not what it should be or could be.)
Years ago, I read this very helpful post about how to write sex scenes. The author compared it to writing action scenes - description must be offset by action, otherwise it just isn't hot.
To be honest, while it was an interesting read, I don't reference it at all when I write smut. When I write sex scenes (or the groping that leads up to sex because I am too lazy about dedicating long scenes to full penetration), I reference what I know. And what I know is the smut fics I read. So this post is hugely, hugely biased and my opinion only. This is what works for me, in what I read and what I write. I do not claim any of the following as a blanket statement of truth, applicable to anyone but myself (though I think what I say can apply to many others as well). There will be exceptions. There will be people who think I'm just plain wrong. YOUR MILEAGE MAY VARY. With that in mind...
I.
I find that the lines that trigger the most reaction are actually pretty simple and straightfoward. Someone is moving a hand, or someone is drawing in a short, surprised breath. Someone is letting his her skirt ride up (wow, my crossdressing kink, it burns - and will be addressed later), or someone is kissing someone else.
It's the set-up and the reaction of the characters that make the scene flow. I find that I don't react as positively to smut scenes with long run-on sentences that try to build up the tension of the scene in a rush of words that crescendo (simulating the characters' orgasms) in a stream of consciousness that breaks off at the peak.
For example:
Their hands slipped over each other, shuddering, unsure, desperate for any touch of slick skin, and Zhou Mi's leg was between Kyuhyun's, tight and hard and rocking to the rhythm set by their hearts and their gasps as they fell into each other, mouth to mouth, teeth nipping, and Kyuhyun could only hear the ringing in his ears, the dizzying rush of heat and pleasure and slap of skin against skin until the heat built tight in his stomach, rising, rising, and he was poised at a precipice with no return and--oh.
I used to write smut like this. Now I don't, because I realize if I read it, I get too distracted by the stylistics of the language and the structure of the sentence to find it hot. I would rather you give me something straightforward:
Kyuhyun smiled and Zhou Mi's stomach dipped. There was an edge to that smile Zhou Mi hadn't seen before, except in his dreams. Kyuhyun's hand hadn't moved from between his legs during their entire exchange, but now he licked his lips a little and pressed gently. Zhou Mi's shudder was involutary.
This, actually, resonates with the post I linked above. Less description, more action. The pretty language can occasionally be used in heavily-styled, atmospheric-pieces, where the smut may not be the point, but those are the exceptions. And if the smut is not the point, then it's probably not what I'm trying to address in this post. I am rarely a fan of stylistic pieces in general, except for the rare one, and I'm even less of a fan when it comes to smut. I'd like my porn hot, please, not lost under a heavy veil of pretty language.
II.
Actions are hot. Couple this with kinks and your smut will automatically get twice as hot. Keep in mind that kinks don't necessarily have to be over-the-top to be kinky or sexy. Here are some of my favorite (tamer, lol) kinks of boysex:
--vertical surface slamming (e.g., door, wall, whatever)
--ties, suits
--collarbones, neck
--public, semi-public places (e.g., handjobs during a press conference or on the public subway, sex in a closet, blowjob in a restaurant or a bathroom, etc.)
--possessiveness
--teeth (that mark or drag just a little during a blowjob)
--crossdressing (this is new to me, thank you very much, Super Junior fandom)
Incorporate things like this (that you like, or that you know other people like) and your smutty scene is automatically hot! There doesn't need to be a full description of anal sex. There doesn't even need to be a full description of a blowjob, because hotness can be all built up in the foreplay, or contained in a sentence or two.
III.
Brevity can be your friend. Some of the hottest fics I've read spent, literally, about two short paragraphs describing the sex act. The rest of the hotness came from building up their sexual tension, rampant sexual frustration, and generally a lot of teasing, both of the characters and of the reader. I actually tend to find that sex scenes that take pages end up boring me, and I will scroll down because it's really all the same. My attention span is short, and if you've read one explicit sex scene, you've read them all. I typically will not find paragraphs of text describing sex nearly as hot as one or two good lines in a PG-13 or R fic. But maybe I just have no attention span, like I said.
So the point is you shouldn't worry too much about description. Again, the emphasis is on action. You want to dwell on how hot Kyuhyun looks with the first few buttons of his shirt gaping open and his collarbone peeking out? Mention it, then make Zhou Mi react to it. Make him do something about it, or make something interrupt them; just make something happen. Maybe you want to describe how Kyuhyun's voice breaks when Zhou Mi thrusts two fingers into him. I'd suggest this:
Zhou Mi finally lifts his head away from Kyuhyun's cock, much to Kyuhyun's displeasure. He opens his mouth to protest, but a sharp, shocked little cry escapes him instead - Zhou Mi has slipped a finger into him. Kyuhyun wriggles, arches his back, and pants, "Move."
over this:
Zhou Mi lets Kyuhyun's cock fall from his mouth, damp and swollen red, as Kyuhyun thrashes on the bed in displeasure. He opens his mouth to protest, glaring, but Zhou Mi's hand falls between his legs and suddenly there is a long, slender digit probing at Kyuhyun's entrance. A sharp, shocked little cry escapes Kyuhyun as the tip of the finger slides in, teasing, and he sees Zhou Mi grinning.
"Fuck you," Kyuhyun pants, but he's desperate for more, and the way he moves against the bed is proof of that. Zhou Mi's grin widens and his finger slides in deeper, and Kyuhyun arches his back when it finally brushes that sensitive spot.
"Please," he begs, changing his tune. "Please. Move."
There's really nothing wrong with the second example except that I just spent three paragraphs on one thing: Zhou Mi sliding one finger into Kyuhyun. Picture that multiplied by another fifty minute acts during sex, such as kissing, teasing a nipple, or feathering ticklish touches along the backside of Zhou Mi's knee, or Kyuhyun giving Zhou Mi a blowjob (though that'd take, like, five to eight paragraphs at least). That's one epic sex scene, you guys. Sometimes it's worth it because sometimes it comes out an excruciatingly hot sex scene that everyone is glad is so long. Most of the time, though, my eyes glaze over. I'd like the plot back. And if it's a one-shot PWP, then it had better be some damn good writing if it's going to keep me engaged in this one act from beginning to end.
It's the same as writing a one-shot all set in one scene (whether it is one moment in the rain, or one moment of heartbreak, or realization, whatever) - it needs to be especially well written to make that one scene mean something. If you lose the reader's interest before the end, you're screwed, because you've got nothing going on after.
If there's plot going on, then you've got to make the sex hot enough to keep the reader's interest, to make sure they aren't skimming over it or skipping it altogether to find out what happens next. Sex that happens for a reason is especially lovely. Sometimes gratuitous sex is nice, but that kind of sex put into a plotty fic will be, well, really obvious, sort of jarring, and sometimes skipped.
IV.
Another thing: characterization. It is essential. No matter how good your smut is, if the words coming out of the characters' mouths seems entirely out of character, I will like your fic less. Your smut will automatically be downgraded at least a little bit. Characterizaton matters in porn, because I chose to read this smutty fic for this pairing because I like the two characters and I think it would be hot if they got it on. If you fuck up their characterizations, then it's not them getting it on, and it's no longer as hot.
Of course creative license allows for, well, creativity, but there's got to be a foundation of believability. You will get called on OOC-ness if you change an aspect of a character's personality without justifying it or explaining it. Zhou Mi, for instance, will not be randomly abusive and like hurting Kyuhyun just for the sake of hurting him. No, wtf. Having him be more aggressive (lol he's afraid of small bugs) or curse more might be sold more believably to the reader, however, if done right. (Though a whiny and bossy and slightly mischievous but very, very easy Zhou Mi is what I see most in my head.)
V.
It's okay to use the word cock. I prefer it most. Dick is a little cruder, and I'm less of a fan, but it works if you're trying to go for a rougher atmosphere or description of sex, possibly dub-con or non-con. Or just something mutually beneficial but not particuarly emotionally invested. (Again, these are just my opinions; this is how I associate these words, but that doesn't make them indelible facts for other people.) I'm also all right with "arousal" and "erection" or "hardness", depending on how its used. Saying that Zhou Mi's arousal penetrated Kyuhyun's ass sounds a bit wrong, because arousal and erection are descriptions of the state of being of his cock, but are not direct substitutes for that thing that hangs between his legs.
More about cocks: it's also okay the vary the word you use for the tip! The head, the crown, etc. There is a slit. The cock has veins. Then there are the balls/sacs and, oh hey guys, I know it's easy to think that guys are hairless (especially for the pretty boys we like in Kpop), but they're not. There's also hair around the base of the cock. You don't have to mention it (I personally don't find it particularly hot) but you should keep that in mind as you're writing. These are...not girls.
Cocks weeping or leaking are hot, but please do your research before you write smut. Precome (I don't like the word "cum", ever, unless it's Latin) does not shoot from the tip. Neither is semen/come thick and ropey. No. Asses are not self-lubricating; that is why people invented lube. There is so much wank involved in writing smut, especially slash, that I won't get into, but those are some basics. (There is one subject I am absolutely not touching here and that is rape, because that's another two or three essays, oh god.)
To sum up, in smut:
1. actions are as important (if not more) than descriptions
2. kinks are hot (you can deviate from the standard kiss-grope-handjob-sex)
3. brevity can be your friend
4. characterization is key
5. know the basics for boy-on-boy sex (including vocab)
There might be more, but it's late and I just spent about an hour metaing about porn. I mean...wtf. I could've spent that time actually writing porn instead of writing about it. I actually need to go get a life now. ::cries:: In any case, I hope someone found this post useful or at least interesting (my kinks, let me show you them), but if you think I need to stfu, lol sorry. I talk way too much, I know.
Remember, these are my opinions only. You have every right to disagree with them. :)
I saw JJ Lin run as torchbearer for the Olympics earlier on TV. :D JJ Lin, ilusm! ♥ When he came on TV, I nearly fell off the couch because up until then it was all a bunch of middle-aged people I didn't recognize. I fangirled him ("ohmygod he's so cuuuute") and my parents laughed at me. My life.