you know who i am
Hey You
I dont even know Im writting this or why I am going public. I am not gonna lie tonight was the worst night of my life. You are right I will never ever ever be able to forget this surprise. I just relistened to your voice mail and I heard so much anger. How was I so foolish to think that everything was ok. How am I such an Idiot. Why do i love this drama so. Why do i wear my emotions at my sleeve. Really what am I gonna do wiht myself...
Not only have I hurt the one person that I Love but I have managed to do it on several occations..I fucked up so many relationships in the process which hurts even more...
I thought honesty was best for when it was absolutly needed in some painful situations. but now I'm realizing that if i was just honest in the first place this would have never have happenened. what the fuck who am I kidding i cant controll anything about myself despite all my rage im still just a rat in a cage right. I dont want to give up...I am gonna keep fighting...I have learned that if you try to hide it it is just gonna come off so much stonger and bite you really really hard in the asss. Im not a very big fan of this...
I Love you so much and I hope that you know that i kept it from you becasue i didnt want things to change. I had been punishing myself all along for being such a dumbass that I didnt think that I needed anyone elses help......I cant write anymore because it just hurts too much..
you know how i feel we had this talk..yet i feel like i didnt get through to u. there is soo much more I would love to say..so much anger i wish i can take away..but i cant. I Just have to except the fact that I love to hurt the one thing I cant live without...
im your poison..I odnt want to be poison anymore. Cant i be strawberry lemonade. Sweet and cute and right to the point...
nope i have always been this a hidden shroad of secrets misconceptions and lies.....
I Just want to be myself for once. You were the person that allowed me to be myself to open up...to take that dive into love..you let me be freeee...which helped me develop great amazing friendships
despite what you think i tell u more than you will ever know. It is just hard for some people to let go and open their minds for someone else. I have always learned to write my anger and feelings down..i cant just share them like you
in closing I love you soo much and Im not gonna beg bc i make fun of those people. Im strong and not pathetic although I feel very weak sometimes. You are my strength and my back bone...thank you for everything youve done..if you can never forgive me I understand..that must be hardddd
ps im really pathetic putting this on lj...like really bad..but i wanted you to seee it and Im not gonna hide myself anymore..its in the open now
this is me i guesss
heartbreaker meagan
I dont even know Im writting this or why I am going public. I am not gonna lie tonight was the worst night of my life. You are right I will never ever ever be able to forget this surprise. I just relistened to your voice mail and I heard so much anger. How was I so foolish to think that everything was ok. How am I such an Idiot. Why do i love this drama so. Why do i wear my emotions at my sleeve. Really what am I gonna do wiht myself...
Not only have I hurt the one person that I Love but I have managed to do it on several occations..I fucked up so many relationships in the process which hurts even more...
I thought honesty was best for when it was absolutly needed in some painful situations. but now I'm realizing that if i was just honest in the first place this would have never have happenened. what the fuck who am I kidding i cant controll anything about myself despite all my rage im still just a rat in a cage right. I dont want to give up...I am gonna keep fighting...I have learned that if you try to hide it it is just gonna come off so much stonger and bite you really really hard in the asss. Im not a very big fan of this...
I Love you so much and I hope that you know that i kept it from you becasue i didnt want things to change. I had been punishing myself all along for being such a dumbass that I didnt think that I needed anyone elses help......I cant write anymore because it just hurts too much..
you know how i feel we had this talk..yet i feel like i didnt get through to u. there is soo much more I would love to say..so much anger i wish i can take away..but i cant. I Just have to except the fact that I love to hurt the one thing I cant live without...
im your poison..I odnt want to be poison anymore. Cant i be strawberry lemonade. Sweet and cute and right to the point...
nope i have always been this a hidden shroad of secrets misconceptions and lies.....
I Just want to be myself for once. You were the person that allowed me to be myself to open up...to take that dive into love..you let me be freeee...which helped me develop great amazing friendships
despite what you think i tell u more than you will ever know. It is just hard for some people to let go and open their minds for someone else. I have always learned to write my anger and feelings down..i cant just share them like you
in closing I love you soo much and Im not gonna beg bc i make fun of those people. Im strong and not pathetic although I feel very weak sometimes. You are my strength and my back bone...thank you for everything youve done..if you can never forgive me I understand..that must be hardddd
ps im really pathetic putting this on lj...like really bad..but i wanted you to seee it and Im not gonna hide myself anymore..its in the open now
this is me i guesss
heartbreaker meagan