Gossip
Title: Gossip
Chapter: Hot Dog
Characters/Pairings: Hot Dog, Lee; Kara/Lee
Spoilers/Warning: R
Summary: “Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.” Benjamin Franklin - Secrets spread quickly around Galactica… Here’s how.
Disclaimer: All television shows, movies, books, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work, and the characters, settings, and events thereof, are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for-profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context, and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.
Author’s Note:
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The more Hot Dog thought about it, the more humorous the situation became. Oh, he was still scared shitless that Helo was going to beat him into next week when he found out how badly he'd been cheated in that Triad game last night, but he couldn't help laughing every time he thought of Starbuck and the Major. This one was definitely going to get the fur flying and he couldn't wait for a front row seat.
In fact, he thought as he spotted said Major spot-checking one of the Vipers, I can't wait at all.
"Sir," Hot Dog said as he sidled up to Lee. "Is there anything that I can help with, sir?"
Lee looked Hot Dog up and down before nodding and jerking his head in the direction of the equipment room. "Some asshole frakked up one of the flight cables and isn't owning up. Think you can take care of that for me?"
Hot Dog nearly choked. "Yes, sir. I'll get right on that." He took a few steps away before stopping and saying, "Oh, and sir? I hear congratulations are in order."
Lee turned to Hot Dog and raised an eyebrow. "Excuse me?"
"Congratulations, sir," Hot Dog said. He smiled inwardly at the curious expression on Lee's face and added, "Starbuck."
Lee blinked. "What about her?"
"The baby, sir," Hot Dog said cheerfully. "She's having a baby. Well, I guess you are too. Huh?"
"I'm sorry." Lee held up a hand. "I don't think I heard you correctly."
"You and the Captain," Hot Dog said slowly. "I bet you're so excited to be a dad."
"A what?" Lee pulled at his collar.
"A dad." Gods, Hot Dog was enjoying this. "You know, since Starbuck is pregnant with your child."
"She's what with my what?"
Hot Dog had never seen the Major so uncomfortable. "Pregnant with your child."
"That's what I thought you said." Lee bit his lip.
"I bet you'll make a great dad." Hot Dog smiled serenely. "What if you have a little girl? Just think of the cute piggy-tails and the frilly dresses with those big, puffy sleeves.” He gestured to his bicep. “And she'll want you to play house with her all the time. Oh, she'll be your little princess; growing up on a battlestar where almost seventy percent of the population is male. You'll have to keep her under lock and key if she's anything like her mother."
Lee was quickly turning green. "Anything like her mother?"
"Well we all know how wild Starbuck is." Hot Dog laughed affectionately. "Your daughter. Wow.”
Lee opened his mouth, shut it, and then asked, "She told you she was pregnant?"
"No, but everyone knows sir." Well, they would in a few short hours. "I can't believe the Admiral hasn't called you into his office for a celebratory cigar. It will be his first grandchild after all."
"This isn't a joke, is it?" Lee asked. "Because I will have your ass if it is."
"No sir, I swear," Hot Dog said, crossing his heart with his finger. "Would anyone want to joke about Apollo and Starbuck's love child?"
Lee took a deep breath. "Oh Gods."
"Oh no," Hot Dog feigned ignorance. "Sir, did you not know? Did I just spill the beans?"
"No Hot Dog," Lee said shaking his head. He clapped Hot Dog on the shoulder and said, "You've done a good thing here pilot. Thank you."
The second the Major was out of earshot, Hot Dog burst out laughing.