free me from this give and take, free me from this great debate

[megalomaniac]

oh man.
the peepholes are playing with faster miles per hour on thursday.
i'm excited. even though i will be sober.
i'm especially excited because there was nothing really worthwhile going on this coming weekend, at least not to my knowledge.
don't be surprised if i hide in a corner at the show. i made such an enormous ass of myself on saturday night, hitting on boys is SO not my specialty. especially when they have girlfriends. jesus.
believe it or not, i am a practical girl.
i don't get crushes on boys who have girlfriends. what's the point?
but after careful observation and some accidental investigation over the last month or two... i was convinced they had broken up.
so convinced.
wrong.
i need a change of scenery.
the repetition of week after week can be so depressing.
roxxy's/cbtg's/barnone/the spur/the ship/etc. drinking, smoking, drinking.
lather. rinse. repeat.
i feel like i have no identity.
i have been giving serious consideration to going back to school.
mainly because i feel stupid a lot lately but i know that i'm not.
so school might help revive my smarts.