I AM

[meeshinboston]

That silly Goody Two Shoes tagged me on this and I'll be a sugar lump if I let her get the better of me...

I AM better than you

I WANT everyone to get out of my space, off my cloud, and to eff themselves somewhere dank and airtight

I WISH that what I WANT would happen this moment

I MISS the days when I was the Only Twin

I HEAR that the Goody Two Shoes hasn't gotten published yet HEE!

I WONDER what the hell that "wonder wonder streeking streeking" shit meant

I REGRET that the rest of the world isn't as evil as I

I AM NOT your pace car, your mother, your babe, darling, or sweetie, so shove off!

I DANCE every time I get even, and I waltzed as I laid my evil plans

I AM NOT ALWAYS this nice

I MAKE WITH MY HANDS special gestures regarding the mating proficiency of other drivers

I WRITE curses and other special love notes

I CONFUSE other people, with great joy and deliberation

I SHOULD change the channel because the Astros SUCK

I START laying my evil plans as soon as I wake

I FINISH thinking about those plans as I fall asleep

I TAG no one -- because no one's opinion is as important as mine