kate, claire
kate, claire
PG
vague spoilers for "I Do" (3.06)
appx 350 words
Claire probably has no idea how many times Kate has thought about that day the baby was born. Kate's life has always been about panic, and she's gotten pretty good at dealing with it, floating high above the situation until it can't touch her, can't get to her, landing again only when it's safe to be inside her own head, deal with her feelings. It's hard for her to even imagine Jack's coping mechanism, letting the fear in, because for her, there is no counting and dispelling it. Once it's there, it stays.
That was what happened the day Aaron came into the world. When she flew back through the jungle, her heart beat so hard in her chest she was dizzy. She thought she might pass out or throw up. She can't even remember how she did it, how she held Claire together well enough to get that baby born. Or how she held herself together . That answer, she knows, is probably the same as why she was so afraid in the first place: somebody else's life was in her hands. She knows it's just a small taste of what Jack feels everyday, and not because he has to but because he's taken it on himself.
And so she has, too. Putting herself between the Others and Sawyer was just as involuntary as Jack sending her into the jungle, and just as voluntary as her asking Claire to push just one more time.
So she thinks of that day, and she mostly remembers not her own actions but Claire's face, bearing down in pain and determination. Kate can't remember how she helped her survive it; she can only hope she gets Sawyer through this the same way, working in a blind panic but holding on for dear life. What she really wants to know is how to survive the ordeal herself. Claire would know, she thinks.
She's tired of running--lungs on fire, doubled over clutching the cramped muscles in her side--when she realizes Claire wasn't surviving for herself then either.
Beside her, Sawyer's breath sounds in ragged gasps. She takes his hand and pulls him forward.
PG
vague spoilers for "I Do" (3.06)
appx 350 words
Claire probably has no idea how many times Kate has thought about that day the baby was born. Kate's life has always been about panic, and she's gotten pretty good at dealing with it, floating high above the situation until it can't touch her, can't get to her, landing again only when it's safe to be inside her own head, deal with her feelings. It's hard for her to even imagine Jack's coping mechanism, letting the fear in, because for her, there is no counting and dispelling it. Once it's there, it stays.
That was what happened the day Aaron came into the world. When she flew back through the jungle, her heart beat so hard in her chest she was dizzy. She thought she might pass out or throw up. She can't even remember how she did it, how she held Claire together well enough to get that baby born. Or how she held herself together . That answer, she knows, is probably the same as why she was so afraid in the first place: somebody else's life was in her hands. She knows it's just a small taste of what Jack feels everyday, and not because he has to but because he's taken it on himself.
And so she has, too. Putting herself between the Others and Sawyer was just as involuntary as Jack sending her into the jungle, and just as voluntary as her asking Claire to push just one more time.
So she thinks of that day, and she mostly remembers not her own actions but Claire's face, bearing down in pain and determination. Kate can't remember how she helped her survive it; she can only hope she gets Sawyer through this the same way, working in a blind panic but holding on for dear life. What she really wants to know is how to survive the ordeal herself. Claire would know, she thinks.
She's tired of running--lungs on fire, doubled over clutching the cramped muscles in her side--when she realizes Claire wasn't surviving for herself then either.
Beside her, Sawyer's breath sounds in ragged gasps. She takes his hand and pulls him forward.