(no subject)
It's done. I finally realized that getting Robbie aka Baby (tee hee, which is apparently his name now.. not just from me, it's caught on haha) his dream guitar was feasable. I talked to mom, which made me kind of nervous. Not even a problem with her at all. According to her though, Robbie is the one paying for it. She's very weird about how I spend money, especially that amount. Which I now think wouldn't really be a problem either, but, she must think the world of Robbie (which her and dad do, I knew that already) to co-sign a loan for him. What my plan was going to be was to get a loan myself and just do it that way. So, that way I could just be like oh hey... this came for you today. Haha. But, mom talked me into getting it through Robbie that way he can build his credit back up so when we get married it won't be impossible to get a house, cars, any of that.
I love that boy. He says all the things he feels for me and I feel the same damn way. No, he goes on and on about how much he loves me and why and I, of course, eat it up. But, the reason I love it so much is because all the things he says, I feel, and I've always wanted to hear those things... BUT the fact that I know he means them. It's just the greatest thing to know that I love someone as much as I possibly can. If I loved him anymore I would explode, most of the time I feel I'm going to anyway, so I just squeeze him as hard as I can. Haha. But, to know that I love him so much and the fact he was one of my best friends for so long and to know he feels the same way. Wow. He tells me things about what he thought and felt for the past three years and I just... *happy sigh* I really don't believe people get it. Turns out I don't give a fuck, what does it matter? We are more perfect for each other than any two people in the world have ever been. Silly? Yes, but true. Haha.
And I've changed so drastically and it happened over night. At the beginning of the year I remember a night where I was just so terribly upset and I called Amesha. We were talking about that today and she said that she wasn't even sure I would make it through the night. Then the next day she called to check on me and I was fine. I've been fine ever since. I still have issues, who the hell doesn't? And I think that's one of the reasons why me and Robbie work, because I'm fine and I worked through a lot of stuff before we got together. But he still makes me feel so much better. I have self-esteem. Something I've not had in a long time. He just makes me feel good and feel that I am a good person. Instead of pointing out the negative all the time, he actually says good things. And I've never been 100% comfortable around anyone and let them see who I really am and the fact that he loves me and knows me inside and out is the best feeling. But, it works both ways. I know him... know him completely and I love him... wow.
Anyway, I tend to ramble on and on when I get exited and when I'm really tired, but don't feel like going to bed.
Holy shit, I'm cheesy and mushy. But not as much as Robbie. Haha (seriously though) :)
Okay, bye.
I love that boy. He says all the things he feels for me and I feel the same damn way. No, he goes on and on about how much he loves me and why and I, of course, eat it up. But, the reason I love it so much is because all the things he says, I feel, and I've always wanted to hear those things... BUT the fact that I know he means them. It's just the greatest thing to know that I love someone as much as I possibly can. If I loved him anymore I would explode, most of the time I feel I'm going to anyway, so I just squeeze him as hard as I can. Haha. But, to know that I love him so much and the fact he was one of my best friends for so long and to know he feels the same way. Wow. He tells me things about what he thought and felt for the past three years and I just... *happy sigh* I really don't believe people get it. Turns out I don't give a fuck, what does it matter? We are more perfect for each other than any two people in the world have ever been. Silly? Yes, but true. Haha.
And I've changed so drastically and it happened over night. At the beginning of the year I remember a night where I was just so terribly upset and I called Amesha. We were talking about that today and she said that she wasn't even sure I would make it through the night. Then the next day she called to check on me and I was fine. I've been fine ever since. I still have issues, who the hell doesn't? And I think that's one of the reasons why me and Robbie work, because I'm fine and I worked through a lot of stuff before we got together. But he still makes me feel so much better. I have self-esteem. Something I've not had in a long time. He just makes me feel good and feel that I am a good person. Instead of pointing out the negative all the time, he actually says good things. And I've never been 100% comfortable around anyone and let them see who I really am and the fact that he loves me and knows me inside and out is the best feeling. But, it works both ways. I know him... know him completely and I love him... wow.
Anyway, I tend to ramble on and on when I get exited and when I'm really tired, but don't feel like going to bed.
Holy shit, I'm cheesy and mushy. But not as much as Robbie. Haha (seriously though) :)
Okay, bye.