Humm, cloudy thoughts and alot of rambling.
no no no....this is no good. I threw out all the food that can make me fat in the food caart in my dorm room..b/c I tend to get bored and snack...hell I have been doing awful ya'll. I dont know, I had such good control for awhile there..but now I am slipping again and today when I was changing into my clothes for some fashion show I am in next month, I saw all the fat purtruding off my body, spilling out of my panties...it made me want to hide and cover myself and ball...WHY ME? why wasnt I blessed with a thin, sleek body..why is it other, MEAN, girls who dont deserve to have such a slender body!! pick me, OH PLEASE LORD MAKE ME THIN...urg. this is pathetic...
anyways...I need to get back on track and only consume a total of 600 cals a day ( and workout slightly) so by the end of this month, or by spring break, I will have some weight loss. Actually, I need to cut back to about 500 cals a day. Actually, I need to not eat at all..I think I am going to jsut not eat at all. ana say hello!! Something drastic needs to happen, I keep dickin around and nothing is looking different, I dont feel thinner, I dont look thinner, AND YES I KNOW IT TAKES TIME..but ..this is waaaay to much time...it will happen much more faster if I just cut out all food completely..but of course I cant but I am really buckling down to eating barely anything. ever. not until my birthday dinner in about 3 weeks. OK, I am making a deal with myself. I need to lose 5 pounds in the next 3 weeks..before my birthday..okay, I can do this..I can do this...because thats when I will be going home and I need attention from my parents, and I want them to say, wow! L, you look thin, you look like you have lost weight. AND ill say, ooh no no..its just these clothes..then by summer time I WILL BE A STICK..being as short as I am , losing 5 pounds looks like losing 20...it will be a big diff. Okay, we'll see...wish me luck!!
: This is my time to shine and be thinner than ever : Thi is my time to show to everyone that I can be a skinny bitch too : This is my time to get it right, I can do this :
Love you all! muah!!!
WiNk;
L.
anyways...I need to get back on track and only consume a total of 600 cals a day ( and workout slightly) so by the end of this month, or by spring break, I will have some weight loss. Actually, I need to cut back to about 500 cals a day. Actually, I need to not eat at all..I think I am going to jsut not eat at all. ana say hello!! Something drastic needs to happen, I keep dickin around and nothing is looking different, I dont feel thinner, I dont look thinner, AND YES I KNOW IT TAKES TIME..but ..this is waaaay to much time...it will happen much more faster if I just cut out all food completely..but of course I cant but I am really buckling down to eating barely anything. ever. not until my birthday dinner in about 3 weeks. OK, I am making a deal with myself. I need to lose 5 pounds in the next 3 weeks..before my birthday..okay, I can do this..I can do this...because thats when I will be going home and I need attention from my parents, and I want them to say, wow! L, you look thin, you look like you have lost weight. AND ill say, ooh no no..its just these clothes..then by summer time I WILL BE A STICK..being as short as I am , losing 5 pounds looks like losing 20...it will be a big diff. Okay, we'll see...wish me luck!!
: This is my time to shine and be thinner than ever : Thi is my time to show to everyone that I can be a skinny bitch too : This is my time to get it right, I can do this :
Love you all! muah!!!
WiNk;
L.