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They call me Buddha, why? Because I’m wise and all-knowing, which is odd because I thought enlightened meant that you understood yourself while wisdom meant you understood the world around you. Samar’s friends visited today, lets see if I remember their names…. Crispy (Karthik), Don Don, and Piash. They seemed very impressed by my dorm and took a liking to me relatively quickly, I guess they’re used to the whole people making them feel awkward thing. The condom wall always amazes everyone, I’m so glad that I birthed it. I cut up Kevin’s calendar last night too to decorate the blank wall with beautiful women, its becoming more of a boy’s dorm now. There was some reorganizing and cleaning going on and I’ve now made a habit of making my bed, its actually nice to have everything look perfect, I understand why Kevin is so OC about it now. I did a little physics last night and stopped around midnight when I decided to fix my bed. It was perfect, all the lines were straight and perpendicular to each other, no curves or anything, but I had guests over so it didn’t last very long. I fixed it again in the morning but again, guests. We had a rubber band fight after I made a museum out of my bed, Samar is actually pretty good. All this stuff seems pretty pointless doesn’t it? I’m actually only excited about the Buddha thing. It was beautiful, I was leading the group of Indian men and Risa to Elizabeth Center, then Risa had to go piss afterwards so Samar went with her to this restaurant with the fish tanks that are part of the outer wall. We all stood around and talked about girls for a little bit, turned to look at Samar which brought our attention to the fish tanks. Why is it that they put the fishtanks outside like that? Won’t the fish die? I said that they probably constantly circulate water through the tank that is kept at a set temperature so it doesn’t matter how cold the glass gets, the pumps will just heat it up. Karthik points out that it would be a bother to keep it at a set temperature like that. Wouldn’t it consume a lot of energy? I’m sure it does Karthik but you see, if they don’t put fish out in plain sight, the white people won’t stop to look at the fish, and if they don’t stop to look at the fish, they won’t notice the restaurant and go in. Right as I was saying that, a group of blonde white folk stop at the restaurant, look at the fish, talk for a few seconds and go in. My, what a beautiful moment it was. I can’t say that the fish outside the restaurants have ever influenced my decision on where I should eat, in fact I’m a regular at a place that has no visible live fish at all, our family has never been much for décor. Why fish? Is it exotic? Does it make you feel like you’re in some far away land of white tigers, general tsos chicken, massages with happy endings and squinty eyed folk who don’t shake hands? Acrobats maybe? Lion dances and drums? Firecrackers sold all over the place for a penny a piece because us asian people make things for cheap and we have nothing better to do all day but squint and play with firecrackers. Karthik has been asking of general tsos chicken is white people food, I told him yes of course and he seemed unsatisfied, he’s going to keep asking until he finds someone that will tell him no. Speaking of exotic, I was wondering why in American films, Chinese women are always skanks and always extremely unattractive, it is quite a mystery. I also don’t understand how white men find such ugly Chinese women attractive, it’s a little frightening sometimes the couples I find. I fear the faces of our future. Hahaha, my dorm is what a college dorm should be like huh? I’m a role model for these seniors in highschool? Also a little frightening, I think one of me is enough for this world, really I don’t think it can handle more than one. My god I’ve been sexually frustrated for the past few days, I wonder why.
I sent a package for the first time in my life, its weird not liking anyone right now, I wonder where I should focus my attention. Oh I know I should focus on my studies, but this kind of mental energy is reserved for vagina and vagina only, don’t know why it is that way but that’s just how it is. I’ve always given crappy gifts to people, my whole life I’ve given crappy gifts, I wish I could wow someone one day, leave an impression, make something beautiful that’ll take someone’s breath away or showem I’m worth their time.
Risa got angry at me for joking about Samar’s rash, sorry Risa, I should really stop teasing them about that, its getting old. Yes it was only because of a dirty toilet mmhm, he does sit down doesnt he?
I just watched final destination so I'm a little freaked out, i want to call everyone to see if they're okay but i dont think everyone would respond well to that. I try not to bother emmy these days, she's busy with work and with boys, i know she wants to experience these things that she's been hearing about all her life, and i guess she should try it, she's just gotta think more about life and her decisions, their effects on her life and the people around her. I don't know how she's been doing lately, i havent really been properly updated.
What does love mean these days? The definition keeps changing and its getting more and more difficult to keep my promises, but I’ll keep trying. I see now it shouldn’t matter how the other person feels about you, if you love someone then you’ll always be their protector or work for their benefit. I shouldn’t care how Emily treats me, though recently she has been good to me I think, but yeah, I have to keep loving her no matter what happens. I don’t have to like her, I don’t have to be attracted to her, I don’t have to want to marry her, and she can hate me if she wants to, I just want the best for her, that much will never change, I’ll always be concerned. Why do I try so hard? I think its rare that you come across friends like me, I don’t think I can do much harm, I have only good intentions and always will, I don’t think I am an asset she should let go. Its her choice on whether or not to keep me, it doesn’t mean I’ll stop bugging her about everything though, telling her not to sled on ice or run into traffic or skip meals. I’ll keep telling her if she’s changing for the worse or getting into something she shouldn’t be getting into, but I won’t do it that often, I know its hard listening to it sometimes. I sound like a parent sometimes, I’ve been told that by a handful of people and I don’t think they mean it in a good way, yeah it is too early isn’t it? I wanna go have some fun.
I sent a package for the first time in my life, its weird not liking anyone right now, I wonder where I should focus my attention. Oh I know I should focus on my studies, but this kind of mental energy is reserved for vagina and vagina only, don’t know why it is that way but that’s just how it is. I’ve always given crappy gifts to people, my whole life I’ve given crappy gifts, I wish I could wow someone one day, leave an impression, make something beautiful that’ll take someone’s breath away or showem I’m worth their time.
Risa got angry at me for joking about Samar’s rash, sorry Risa, I should really stop teasing them about that, its getting old. Yes it was only because of a dirty toilet mmhm, he does sit down doesnt he?
I just watched final destination so I'm a little freaked out, i want to call everyone to see if they're okay but i dont think everyone would respond well to that. I try not to bother emmy these days, she's busy with work and with boys, i know she wants to experience these things that she's been hearing about all her life, and i guess she should try it, she's just gotta think more about life and her decisions, their effects on her life and the people around her. I don't know how she's been doing lately, i havent really been properly updated.
What does love mean these days? The definition keeps changing and its getting more and more difficult to keep my promises, but I’ll keep trying. I see now it shouldn’t matter how the other person feels about you, if you love someone then you’ll always be their protector or work for their benefit. I shouldn’t care how Emily treats me, though recently she has been good to me I think, but yeah, I have to keep loving her no matter what happens. I don’t have to like her, I don’t have to be attracted to her, I don’t have to want to marry her, and she can hate me if she wants to, I just want the best for her, that much will never change, I’ll always be concerned. Why do I try so hard? I think its rare that you come across friends like me, I don’t think I can do much harm, I have only good intentions and always will, I don’t think I am an asset she should let go. Its her choice on whether or not to keep me, it doesn’t mean I’ll stop bugging her about everything though, telling her not to sled on ice or run into traffic or skip meals. I’ll keep telling her if she’s changing for the worse or getting into something she shouldn’t be getting into, but I won’t do it that often, I know its hard listening to it sometimes. I sound like a parent sometimes, I’ve been told that by a handful of people and I don’t think they mean it in a good way, yeah it is too early isn’t it? I wanna go have some fun.