(no subject)
continuation......
it's getting hard to want to go on as i am without exploding at someone. i feel that by giving people false respect i am giving myself none which is really doing my spirit in. by saying "giving people false respect" i'm talking about people in authority over me or people who command it through stupidity and ignorance. i'm finding it harder and harder to want to put any energy into the people who just sail through life without caring. why the hell should i have to do so much to understand myself and have them just expect the answers when i have a conclusion? there is so much uncertainty in the average person. wether it be in themselves or in those around them, there is just this energy of people just "floating through life" and not being able to mentally fend for themselves when something comes up that's a bit difficult.
it's taking a lot of my energy to pull back from some of the people i just cant help anymore. i feel sad that i dont just live to make others feel better anymore but i just cant do it. in all honesty i loved spending time helping out people who had no direction because i could push them down the same path as me and feel good that i wasn't alone. one day i just sort of woke up and thought to myself...."even though we all walk together with those we love, we also travel alone and by choice. we should travel under our own convictions and by our own motivation we should walk the journey that is life." to help someone that wont help themselves is to practically have someone jump on your back for a while and ride you like a $2 donkey until either you collapse or they want to get on someone elses back. these are the kind of people i am trying to avoid at the moment because i just dont have the energy to "carry" them anymore. i will carry those i love without question due to the fact that they would not question me if i needed their help. these people know who they are and i would like to think that all my close friends dont doubt for a minute that i am talking about them.
this seems a negative post mostly but i guess it's just me saying to myself WAKE THE FUCK UP! to sit and think about other people and their ignorance and stupidity is to give their cause energy and it's just not right. i shouldn't have to do that. i have too much love to give to my beautiful friends, my amazing partner, my family and my beautiful child that is soon to be born. to me these things are what i hold closest to my heart and love with everything i can.
it's getting hard to want to go on as i am without exploding at someone. i feel that by giving people false respect i am giving myself none which is really doing my spirit in. by saying "giving people false respect" i'm talking about people in authority over me or people who command it through stupidity and ignorance. i'm finding it harder and harder to want to put any energy into the people who just sail through life without caring. why the hell should i have to do so much to understand myself and have them just expect the answers when i have a conclusion? there is so much uncertainty in the average person. wether it be in themselves or in those around them, there is just this energy of people just "floating through life" and not being able to mentally fend for themselves when something comes up that's a bit difficult.
it's taking a lot of my energy to pull back from some of the people i just cant help anymore. i feel sad that i dont just live to make others feel better anymore but i just cant do it. in all honesty i loved spending time helping out people who had no direction because i could push them down the same path as me and feel good that i wasn't alone. one day i just sort of woke up and thought to myself...."even though we all walk together with those we love, we also travel alone and by choice. we should travel under our own convictions and by our own motivation we should walk the journey that is life." to help someone that wont help themselves is to practically have someone jump on your back for a while and ride you like a $2 donkey until either you collapse or they want to get on someone elses back. these are the kind of people i am trying to avoid at the moment because i just dont have the energy to "carry" them anymore. i will carry those i love without question due to the fact that they would not question me if i needed their help. these people know who they are and i would like to think that all my close friends dont doubt for a minute that i am talking about them.
this seems a negative post mostly but i guess it's just me saying to myself WAKE THE FUCK UP! to sit and think about other people and their ignorance and stupidity is to give their cause energy and it's just not right. i shouldn't have to do that. i have too much love to give to my beautiful friends, my amazing partner, my family and my beautiful child that is soon to be born. to me these things are what i hold closest to my heart and love with everything i can.