To my brats kids.
(( This is a letter Mat's sending to all the kids he knows about - Juniandi, Ashtaar, Mari'Jo, Talash and Mekt. He may or may not have been drinking. He may just be in a rambling mood - I DON'T KNOW. What I do know is that he's just another cranky bastard, and this is how he'll always be.
... And he may keep copies of this letter to hand out to any other kids he may eventually discover. ))
Once upon a time your father, like most pirates of his era, made frequent visits to houses of ill repute, lonely women, bars and various other similar establishments as well as into the jungle to mingle with the women of his tribe. Some of these visits ended in sex. Glorious sex. Others ended in black eyes, bloody noses and death threats - on his part, not those of the women (or their pissed-off husbands).
Stranglethorn and its surrounding areas are not known for their intelligent use of any baby-preventing methods. Hell, neither is any whore house outside of Silvermoon, for that matter, so a lot of those visits ended in kids.
I wasn't unique in my situation. I had heard similar woes from other sailors - some of which, due to their reputations and the children that sparked them, couldn't make landfall in certain harbours or had to, I dunno, wear disguises or something.
So, contrary to what a lotta folk might tell you, the amount of kids I do have isn't unusual for this day and age. Some of you may wind up with husbands that take multiple women as their wives - I can think of one such guy - and those fellas could have seven kids from one girl, five from another, whatever, over the course of a decade or something. Think of it that way from me.
I don't know how many of you are still alive. I know a bunch are dead - the jungle claimed some, or Hakkar's minions did - and there's nothing I can do about that. The rest of you, though.
To date, there's Talash, Juniandi, Ashtaar, Mari'jo and Mekt. If I have sons, I don't know who they are - the one I did know of went AWOL and is probably dead. I have one grandson, Koru, who belongs to Talash and was an orphan.
I've been through tons of shit that you kids wouldn't want to go through yourselves. I've seen shit I hope you never have to see. I've been kicked, abused and otherwise treated like trash and that's had a real big impact on the man that I am now. I'm not capable of being the fuzzy, cuddly dad that some of you might have grown to expect - but I do promise you that I won't let you make the same mistakes I did.
WITH THAT SAID if any of you pull the following shit, so help me Ogoun, I will kick your sorry asses:
- Get possessed and start mutilating people/doing stupid shit*
- Have freak-kids that aren't 100% Troll
- Fuck with the apothecaries*
- Become pirates*
- Become raging alcoholics
- Turn against the Horde*
I may be a grumpy sonovabitch, I may not approve of half the shit you all do with your lives, I may be in a constant state of "extremely fucking frustrated", but I do give a damn about the lot of you, and that is why I'm such a fucking asshole sometimes.
When I'm dead and gone, you'll get it.
With love Love I like you all a lot, really
I don't hate you. Seriously. So the closest I can come to is <3,
Your father,
- Matojo Furiey
* may result in getting shot
... And he may keep copies of this letter to hand out to any other kids he may eventually discover. ))
Once upon a time your father, like most pirates of his era, made frequent visits to houses of ill repute, lonely women, bars and various other similar establishments as well as into the jungle to mingle with the women of his tribe. Some of these visits ended in sex. Glorious sex. Others ended in black eyes, bloody noses and death threats - on his part, not those of the women (or their pissed-off husbands).
Stranglethorn and its surrounding areas are not known for their intelligent use of any baby-preventing methods. Hell, neither is any whore house outside of Silvermoon, for that matter, so a lot of those visits ended in kids.
I wasn't unique in my situation. I had heard similar woes from other sailors - some of which, due to their reputations and the children that sparked them, couldn't make landfall in certain harbours or had to, I dunno, wear disguises or something.
So, contrary to what a lotta folk might tell you, the amount of kids I do have isn't unusual for this day and age. Some of you may wind up with husbands that take multiple women as their wives - I can think of one such guy - and those fellas could have seven kids from one girl, five from another, whatever, over the course of a decade or something. Think of it that way from me.
I don't know how many of you are still alive. I know a bunch are dead - the jungle claimed some, or Hakkar's minions did - and there's nothing I can do about that. The rest of you, though.
To date, there's Talash, Juniandi, Ashtaar, Mari'jo and Mekt. If I have sons, I don't know who they are - the one I did know of went AWOL and is probably dead. I have one grandson, Koru, who belongs to Talash and was an orphan.
I've been through tons of shit that you kids wouldn't want to go through yourselves. I've seen shit I hope you never have to see. I've been kicked, abused and otherwise treated like trash and that's had a real big impact on the man that I am now. I'm not capable of being the fuzzy, cuddly dad that some of you might have grown to expect - but I do promise you that I won't let you make the same mistakes I did.
WITH THAT SAID if any of you pull the following shit, so help me Ogoun, I will kick your sorry asses:
- Get possessed and start mutilating people/doing stupid shit*
- Have freak-kids that aren't 100% Troll
- Fuck with the apothecaries*
- Become pirates*
- Become raging alcoholics
- Turn against the Horde*
I may be a grumpy sonovabitch, I may not approve of half the shit you all do with your lives, I may be in a constant state of "extremely fucking frustrated", but I do give a damn about the lot of you, and that is why I'm such a fucking asshole sometimes.
When I'm dead and gone, you'll get it.
With love Love I like you all a lot, really
I don't hate you. Seriously. So the closest I can come to is <3,
Your father,
- Matojo Furiey
* may result in getting shot