The Holidays Are Here!
Happy Thanksgiving, Merry Christmas, Happy Hannukah, Happy Kwazan, etc, etc.
It's time once again for my family to force me to be materialistic so they won't do it for me. Not only was my birthday earlier this month, but I have graduation in three weeks (HOLY SHIT!) and Christmas a few weeks after that. What's an atheist who hates having stuff supposed to do? (Gift cards, baby!!)
Moving on with one's life can be a scary process I have determined. I was getting used to living in Ames and hanging around with the people I now consider friends. Don't get me wrong, there are definitely people I won't miss being around, but it is the people I have more recently begun to "re-appreciate" that I will miss the most. This means people like my sisters and Ray, Tiff, and Carrie will require more communication as I move on. I have plans for the sort of distant future that may require their services...
I have more recently become worried about actually receiving my diploma. I am 95% certain I failed (I mean 4/66 points kind of failing) and that could pretty much kill me actually receiving the "coveted" (by others) diploma that will make me a viable candidate for "wroking man" status in the corporate world I have come to loathe and fear. Wow, that was a long sentence... Anyway, I really hope that I end up with a diploma, even I don't end up using it. My only interviews have been for management and not marketing. Still looking though, so hopefully someone somewhere will be willing to give me chance.
Since I haven't updated in a while, I will probably have alot to write, so please bear with me. I have recently switched from thoughts of suicide to fearing death once again. I know this sounds strange, but something inside me is determined to live even though a lot of me tends to want to give up. If the "clingy" side would just talk to the other side, I'm sure they could work things out and I would be much happier. They came to a sort of truce in that I decided recently that if I start living a better life (starting to sound a little religious...*shiver*...) then maybe someday I can die knowing that at least I was decent to people around me and didn't piss too many people off. Don't know why or how that placated the fear side of me, but if I question it too much it won't work, so don't ask please!
Been packing all of my junk up. Still have some stuff to get together and put neatly ready for loading, but it looks like I really don't have a lot of stuff. I should be able to get it all ready to go on my last day and then quietly remove myself since people don't seem to care much if I stick around too long after that. I feel like I might have made a few enemies this last semester, but I suppose you can't be liked by the people who try to walk all over you when you stab back at them.
Oh well, enough for now. I suppose I might come up with more, but till then...
Later,
MMMM...Thanksgiving...Pie...Turkey...
Dixie Chicks - Goodbye Earl
It's time once again for my family to force me to be materialistic so they won't do it for me. Not only was my birthday earlier this month, but I have graduation in three weeks (HOLY SHIT!) and Christmas a few weeks after that. What's an atheist who hates having stuff supposed to do? (Gift cards, baby!!)
Moving on with one's life can be a scary process I have determined. I was getting used to living in Ames and hanging around with the people I now consider friends. Don't get me wrong, there are definitely people I won't miss being around, but it is the people I have more recently begun to "re-appreciate" that I will miss the most. This means people like my sisters and Ray, Tiff, and Carrie will require more communication as I move on. I have plans for the sort of distant future that may require their services...
I have more recently become worried about actually receiving my diploma. I am 95% certain I failed (I mean 4/66 points kind of failing) and that could pretty much kill me actually receiving the "coveted" (by others) diploma that will make me a viable candidate for "wroking man" status in the corporate world I have come to loathe and fear. Wow, that was a long sentence... Anyway, I really hope that I end up with a diploma, even I don't end up using it. My only interviews have been for management and not marketing. Still looking though, so hopefully someone somewhere will be willing to give me chance.
Since I haven't updated in a while, I will probably have alot to write, so please bear with me. I have recently switched from thoughts of suicide to fearing death once again. I know this sounds strange, but something inside me is determined to live even though a lot of me tends to want to give up. If the "clingy" side would just talk to the other side, I'm sure they could work things out and I would be much happier. They came to a sort of truce in that I decided recently that if I start living a better life (starting to sound a little religious...*shiver*...) then maybe someday I can die knowing that at least I was decent to people around me and didn't piss too many people off. Don't know why or how that placated the fear side of me, but if I question it too much it won't work, so don't ask please!
Been packing all of my junk up. Still have some stuff to get together and put neatly ready for loading, but it looks like I really don't have a lot of stuff. I should be able to get it all ready to go on my last day and then quietly remove myself since people don't seem to care much if I stick around too long after that. I feel like I might have made a few enemies this last semester, but I suppose you can't be liked by the people who try to walk all over you when you stab back at them.
Oh well, enough for now. I suppose I might come up with more, but till then...
Later,
MMMM...Thanksgiving...Pie...Turkey...
Dixie Chicks - Goodbye Earl