The sense of being an outsider will follow me forever, and wherever I go.
There are always thoughts, the thing is when you’re really emotionally riled up, we’re less aware of these thoughts.
At Treehouse AF 2021 sexting workshop I am in a big circle. The facilitator asks us all to explain to the group out motivations for attending. When it comes to my turn in the circle, I am skipped. The person before me speaks, the person after me begins speaking after they have spoken.
At the Be Your Own Land-lord event on Monday I was on a table of 5 people including myself. The facilitator comes over and asks everyone want their motives for coming was. We go around the circle giving our reasons saying out loud, I am at the end of the circle. When it gets to me, I am skipped over - not invited to speak, and the facilitator speaks to the whole group as if everyone has had their say now.
I manage to make myself invisible so she (was a she in both instances) misses me. I’m so good at making myself invisible. Almost given them permission to skip over me. Perhaps they missed me deliberately because they didn’t think I wanted to speak. My thoughts whisper very loudly that I’m not worthy of attention. I behave in a way that means that I don’t elicit being asked a question.
I move under the guise of giving space to women and minoritised folks to avoid being seen at all.
At Treehouse AF 2021 sexting workshop I am in a big circle. The facilitator asks us all to explain to the group out motivations for attending. When it comes to my turn in the circle, I am skipped. The person before me speaks, the person after me begins speaking after they have spoken.
At the Be Your Own Land-lord event on Monday I was on a table of 5 people including myself. The facilitator comes over and asks everyone want their motives for coming was. We go around the circle giving our reasons saying out loud, I am at the end of the circle. When it gets to me, I am skipped over - not invited to speak, and the facilitator speaks to the whole group as if everyone has had their say now.
I manage to make myself invisible so she (was a she in both instances) misses me. I’m so good at making myself invisible. Almost given them permission to skip over me. Perhaps they missed me deliberately because they didn’t think I wanted to speak. My thoughts whisper very loudly that I’m not worthy of attention. I behave in a way that means that I don’t elicit being asked a question.
I move under the guise of giving space to women and minoritised folks to avoid being seen at all.