i know what i said...
however, i really wanted to put this up somewhere where people might see it...
being in college two years, i had no idea what I was getting into... no one could ever prepare me to be here, but help along the way would be or would have been nice...
honestly i think the hardest thing i've learned here is how to fall in love time and time again....
i say this because for maybe the 3rd time in my life... i may have found it again... i kind of wonder how long it will stay this time... but seeing as how i'm spending the next few days physically alone (with the exception of his roommate and his girl) it kinda hits harder...
I also have to wonder if what I feel really is love... because honestly, i really miss cuddling, and talking in the early hours of the afternoon, and late hours of the night/morning.... and even though it's going to be less than a week, this bothers me more than it used to... i've never been so mildly distraught over not having someone around... maybe I just got too used to it... or maybe it really is something else... I honestly have no idea.. adn it surprises me to an extent that it is on my mind so much. I know I have alot of time to myself, btu usually i don't htink about such things because they're kinda depressing... but i'm not really depressed right now. At the moment, i'm kind of just, lost on my thoughts... swimming cirlces in my head.
I'm staying in WV this summer... no NY for me for quite some time if I can help it. I may have to stop in next summer, for Michelle's sake.. but that will be about it. I absolutely love the time I'm spending here., as I am much happier in WV than i probably ever was in NY, aside from childhood.
Matt is in NC right now with his family, celebrating his sisters' upcomign wedding at the party there. He'll be gone til tuesday some time, hence why i'm thinking alot more now than I probably should be.
We've been together 3 months now... just over in fact... it feels like it's been longer, in a good way. it's weird to put it all in perspective... just this time last year I was having issues with my ex... amazing... time is flying and sometimes i have to wonder if anyone else is feeling it like i do.
Seriously, does anyone else realize my sister graduates next year? she'll be 17 in about a month.. hell i'll be 20 in a month... i'm a junior in the fall, alot of my friends are graduating or have graduated... i have someone i consider a close friend expecting a child at christmas time... seriously... time is flying... and you cant slow it down, or hit pause, or rewind, it just flies... before i know it, it will be this time next year, and I may be making another lengthy update after saying how little I realyl use this thing...
amazingly enough, I don't know if any of my friends are close enough to me anymore to really get this. all my New Yorkers... well, I'm here. and all my West Virginians... it's short lived... they say you will make maybe 2 friends that will last your lifetime in college... I seriously wonder if I've even started on that. Do I really have someone here who would be willing to listen to me ponder these ideas i fathom? could someone here really understand and be able to comment and discuss these things I think about? Is anyone capable of doing that? I hate getting this way sometimes because I really think i'm out of my league when this comes up. Honestly, what am i to do when nights like these come along... *shrug* we'll see...
i guess that's it for now... thinking sleep is gonna happen soon, or at least hoping it is.
being in college two years, i had no idea what I was getting into... no one could ever prepare me to be here, but help along the way would be or would have been nice...
honestly i think the hardest thing i've learned here is how to fall in love time and time again....
i say this because for maybe the 3rd time in my life... i may have found it again... i kind of wonder how long it will stay this time... but seeing as how i'm spending the next few days physically alone (with the exception of his roommate and his girl) it kinda hits harder...
I also have to wonder if what I feel really is love... because honestly, i really miss cuddling, and talking in the early hours of the afternoon, and late hours of the night/morning.... and even though it's going to be less than a week, this bothers me more than it used to... i've never been so mildly distraught over not having someone around... maybe I just got too used to it... or maybe it really is something else... I honestly have no idea.. adn it surprises me to an extent that it is on my mind so much. I know I have alot of time to myself, btu usually i don't htink about such things because they're kinda depressing... but i'm not really depressed right now. At the moment, i'm kind of just, lost on my thoughts... swimming cirlces in my head.
I'm staying in WV this summer... no NY for me for quite some time if I can help it. I may have to stop in next summer, for Michelle's sake.. but that will be about it. I absolutely love the time I'm spending here., as I am much happier in WV than i probably ever was in NY, aside from childhood.
Matt is in NC right now with his family, celebrating his sisters' upcomign wedding at the party there. He'll be gone til tuesday some time, hence why i'm thinking alot more now than I probably should be.
We've been together 3 months now... just over in fact... it feels like it's been longer, in a good way. it's weird to put it all in perspective... just this time last year I was having issues with my ex... amazing... time is flying and sometimes i have to wonder if anyone else is feeling it like i do.
Seriously, does anyone else realize my sister graduates next year? she'll be 17 in about a month.. hell i'll be 20 in a month... i'm a junior in the fall, alot of my friends are graduating or have graduated... i have someone i consider a close friend expecting a child at christmas time... seriously... time is flying... and you cant slow it down, or hit pause, or rewind, it just flies... before i know it, it will be this time next year, and I may be making another lengthy update after saying how little I realyl use this thing...
amazingly enough, I don't know if any of my friends are close enough to me anymore to really get this. all my New Yorkers... well, I'm here. and all my West Virginians... it's short lived... they say you will make maybe 2 friends that will last your lifetime in college... I seriously wonder if I've even started on that. Do I really have someone here who would be willing to listen to me ponder these ideas i fathom? could someone here really understand and be able to comment and discuss these things I think about? Is anyone capable of doing that? I hate getting this way sometimes because I really think i'm out of my league when this comes up. Honestly, what am i to do when nights like these come along... *shrug* we'll see...
i guess that's it for now... thinking sleep is gonna happen soon, or at least hoping it is.