Broken Heart update
This seems to be of interest to various people, so here's an update on the broken hearted child. It is funny, in one way, but in another way it is really kind of upsetting. Recap - Nate is in love with his daycare teacher, and when he learned that she was married he embarked on a campaign of faking illnesses (or believing that he was ill) that has so far lasted almost a week. He broke out in a rash that seems to be anxiety related, he keeps saying his stomach hurts and he's going to throw up (but only once we get to daycare) and never does, and he's just generally more clingy and annoying all at the same time. He's been very whiny and spoilt the past few days, and has been pushing parental annoyance buttons pretty hard.
He didn't ask for this, he didn't set out to fall in love, but that seems to be what has happened. I've been reading advice columns and parenting websites about this and mostly they talk about older kids, but there are a few preschool examples out there. The main thing they say is to take it seriously, but not too seriously. This is real emotion, real feeling, and it's pretty overwhelming for a little guy. Heck, it's pretty overwhelming for some adults! Don't dismiss it out of hand, but don't overreact with your child and say that it's the worst thing in the world.
I worry more about creating a person who thinks that relationship feelings are unimportant and to be disregarded than I do that I'll be spoiling him just a little bit by acknowledging his feelings.
I wonder, do people who grew up with their parents (or siblings, whatever) ridiculing their protestations of love have relationship problems? It'd be so easy (and devastating) to laugh and forget the whole thing, but I think that'd just teach him that these feelings, as powerful as they are, just aren't important.
I hope I'm not over-analyzing it.
He didn't ask for this, he didn't set out to fall in love, but that seems to be what has happened. I've been reading advice columns and parenting websites about this and mostly they talk about older kids, but there are a few preschool examples out there. The main thing they say is to take it seriously, but not too seriously. This is real emotion, real feeling, and it's pretty overwhelming for a little guy. Heck, it's pretty overwhelming for some adults! Don't dismiss it out of hand, but don't overreact with your child and say that it's the worst thing in the world.
I worry more about creating a person who thinks that relationship feelings are unimportant and to be disregarded than I do that I'll be spoiling him just a little bit by acknowledging his feelings.
I wonder, do people who grew up with their parents (or siblings, whatever) ridiculing their protestations of love have relationship problems? It'd be so easy (and devastating) to laugh and forget the whole thing, but I think that'd just teach him that these feelings, as powerful as they are, just aren't important.
I hope I'm not over-analyzing it.