"Listen kid, if I had sex with your girlfriend, would you shut the hell up"
Title quote is directly from me while at the afternoon EWA show on Saturday, while chilling between matches as the "Special Guest Ring Announcer."
My mother is a dear and charming woman. However, she is an idiot. Much in the same way that I'm an idiot, in that we don't think things out much before we speak. Hidden secret of the day is that when I'm managing, I don't put much thought into what I'm going to say. Sometimes this turns out awesome, as this is precisely where the "Marcus (insert hand motions implying I have large gonads) "King Kong" Dowling" thing that everyone seems to love came from. As well, this apparent lack of detail is where my insult to an old woman at EWA this weekend of "I'm going to rip your dentures out of your mouth and eat them" came from as well.
This pertains to my mother, as, while discussing the joys of safe sex with myself and my girlfriend over the weekend, she was quoted as saying "Death is final and children are not final." That's going to be funny for a very very very long time.
Chris Nightmare is an idiot as well. A charming idiot. A very talented idiot. But an idiot nonetheless. This idiot and I, along with our two yet to be named friends have created a stable called "The Dream Theater" in EWA. Our goal is to achieve our dreams at the expense of the dreams of others. Jimmy Starz just achieved his dream of being EWA Cruiserweight Champion. This now means that Chris Nightmare and I are going to have to kill Jimmy Starz to end his dreams, and help Chris achieve his dream of being the EWA Cruiserweight Champion. Come out on November 26th to watch us end the life of a young man in pursuit of his only accomplishment ever in life. It should be fun.
I also ring announced at the EWA's afternoon show, where EWA funder and ancient jackass Mel Jenkins of JD Byrider's Used Cars (where the show was held) decided to refer to me as "Ding Dong." Sadly, the name has stuck. I think the Dream Theater should take over a used car lot. That'd be awesome.
Maryland fans cheer when bad people insult them. I want to see what happens when you hit them in the face. If they cheered then, that'd be the funniest shit ever. Stupid marks.
Tinkling Bells Pork. Sauteed pork in a brown sauce with Chinese vegetables and fried duck wontons. It's the best meal ever.
My home computer is on the fritz, which both sucks and blows at the same time. If I buy a new one, should I get an IMac? Question of the day...
The Redskins lost again. Yay. Now I might be able to go out and not hear about how Mark Brunell is a Pro Bowl quarterback and that Santana Moss is going to be the MVP of the Super Bowl. I hate Redskins fans. Redskins win once, everyone is trying to figure out the mathematics of how long it's going to take to clinch the division. Ugh.
A special hahahahaha to the internet for over reporting the Jim Ross story. There's something incredibly idiotic about people who report news about a predetermined business. It's not news if what's happening has already happened in someone's mind, is it?
Whatever. I'm off to Potbelly Sandwich Works.
Saying cunnilingus in front of your mother is weird,
Marcus