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Nov 25, 2002 20:30

First off I want to say thank you to everyone who friended me and thought that I have something interesting to say. I'll try to not disappoint ( Read more... )

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amanda_marshall November 27 2002, 01:10:24 UTC
Such an accurate recap of the evening *smiles* thank you for that.

Please...God, don't take this the wrong way. Sometimes, I just...I think maybe this was all too much. too much, too fast, you know? I know we said we were going to take things slowly, and I suppose we mostly did. Just...I can see myself falling into the same hole I was in before. And I know exactly what's going to happen when I leave you after Thanksgiving. I'll go with Andy and Eric and I'll sulk. I'll look like everything's fine, and I'll say that everything's fine. But being away from you will be killing me.
Eric will see it, Andy might even know. But I'll know it...and you'll feel it, even from there.
And...this fact is terrifying me. We've only been "together" for a little over a week. And yes, I know that the feelings go back...a ways. But still, the relationship itself is still new. And I'm already so dependant on you.
Please don't take any of this the wrong way...I do want to be with you. I'm not breaking up or anything. But I felt I really needed to tell you what I was feeling

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Re: marc_anthony November 27 2002, 18:04:30 UTC
I'm glad you told me, Amanda. I want you to be able to tell me everything you feel. I know we've spoken about this and you know I'll miss you immensely when you're gone but it'll only make us stronger.

Being away from you will kill me and I'll always feel it but we both know it's for the best. We'll see each other as often as we can. I want you to be comfortable with what we have, baby. We're dependent on each other, Amanda, both of us. I guess because what we feel goes back to before we started this relationship that we're now making up for not being together. We're going to take things one day at a time, we're going to learn how to deal with things that come our way. I told you how much you mean to me, where your place in my heart is... we'll be fine, I know it.

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amanda_marshall November 28 2002, 00:25:34 UTC
I...thought about not telling you. I wasn't sure what would come of it, what it would do to us. I figured we were strong enough to overcome it, but still, I worried.

*nods* I couldn't have possibly said it any better. Thank you for reassuring me. Honestly...I was hoping to keep this nice long thread going, but you've said all the things that were on my mind...
So with that, I love you.

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Re: marc_anthony November 28 2002, 16:25:30 UTC
You can always tell me, baby. And believe me, we can always worry, especially if we're not together all the time, I have to worry about you.

*moves closer to you, wrapping my arms around you* Who says it has to end? Love you, too, baby. I'm going to miss you when you leave.

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Re: amanda_marshall November 29 2002, 01:59:01 UTC
Are you going to worry about me Marc? What about? Please...know that I won't...

Anyways.

*leans against you* I hope you don't mind phone calls everyday. Oooh...*perks up* remember the phone calls?

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Re: marc_anthony November 29 2002, 08:54:17 UTC
I'll worry about how you're feeling, who's going to keep you warm when you curl against them... you know I'll worry.

... know that you won't what?

*smiles when you perk up* Yes, I remember the phone calls, how could I forget? *whispers in your ear* We'll have to do it again... every night...

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Re: amanda_marshall November 29 2002, 11:48:59 UTC
The only person I might be curling up against is Eric, and I'm not even sure if they're going to be home.

I won't...I'm not going home to anybody else. I don't know if you're thinking about that, but you have every right to. Just, know that I'm not.

Every...night.

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marc_anthony November 29 2002, 13:37:40 UTC
So, you don't know where you're going?

I never thought you would be going home to someone else. I know you wouldn't do that.

*nods* Maybe even during the day.

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Re: amanda_marshall November 29 2002, 13:47:31 UTC
Well, I've finally got it figured out. Monday I'll go back to LA. And on the 5th I told Eric I'd go to Vancouver with him to see the Headstones. Then...hrm, probably back home.

*smiles* then to NYC with my man ;)

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Re: marc_anthony November 29 2002, 14:05:35 UTC
Sounds like a good plan, especially coming to see me again.

We're going to be fine, baby. I know it.

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