Saints and Sinners
It seems that everyone is going through hell this week. I thought that the week where I just froze was horrible, but this week is shaping up to be worse. I just cannot seem to motivate myself. I need to do it.
I am getting back work and it just is not up to stuff. I am not happy and I am wondering if this is the right choice. I considered 'Teaching and Learning' but thought that this Dept is more what I want to disseminate. I just don't know anymore. Today, I did not even want to read the comments. I just don't want to deal
Feeling of.....
Thoughts of....
Memories of....
Life is a tricky thing. You think you have things figured out but in the end, it is never what you are led to believe. I am not sure about anything because never in life has anyone ever given me cause to be sure. Things are "after the fact", or "last minute". Sometimes I wish... but I always remember, be careful what you wish for.
I have forgotten what I am doing on any given day.... one act of 'eureka' does not an 'understanding' make. I wonder if I read this in 1 year, whether I would have any inkling of what the hell I am writing?!?!?
I just have these thoughts that are coming fast and furious.
Where is the sense of belonging? (floated away)
Why have three fuckin pillars when the support nothing? (its a Schema, man!)
What is an institution and how is it different from an organization? (one starts with an 'I' and the other...)
What happened that night? (nothing)
How come I can't see a the forest from the trees? (there is no time-line)
What do I want? (a chance to hope)
How sad are you? ( the same, the same)
Does it hurt? (like hell)
What happens now? (the page turns)
Does it matter? (Yes, no, maybe)
Why do I not get a lot of this? (Its cause you're fuckin wasting time sometimes!)
Saints and Sinners have been on my mind. The term has been popping up in my head. So is it ironic that I was dubbed a Saint, when in reality, all I have ever been was a sinner. One of God's jokes on me.
OK. Lets clear things up now...This means nothing to anyone. It means little to me. I know what I am leading to but it lack substance because, there is no substance to it. You... yeah you... in the corner... pay no heed to this. It's not about you... Hell, its not even about me.
They are my words, but it does not mean its all about me...the only things that are about me, are in my head.
And fuck the horses they road in on.
I am getting back work and it just is not up to stuff. I am not happy and I am wondering if this is the right choice. I considered 'Teaching and Learning' but thought that this Dept is more what I want to disseminate. I just don't know anymore. Today, I did not even want to read the comments. I just don't want to deal
Feeling of.....
Thoughts of....
Memories of....
Life is a tricky thing. You think you have things figured out but in the end, it is never what you are led to believe. I am not sure about anything because never in life has anyone ever given me cause to be sure. Things are "after the fact", or "last minute". Sometimes I wish... but I always remember, be careful what you wish for.
I have forgotten what I am doing on any given day.... one act of 'eureka' does not an 'understanding' make. I wonder if I read this in 1 year, whether I would have any inkling of what the hell I am writing?!?!?
I just have these thoughts that are coming fast and furious.
Where is the sense of belonging? (floated away)
Why have three fuckin pillars when the support nothing? (its a Schema, man!)
What is an institution and how is it different from an organization? (one starts with an 'I' and the other...)
What happened that night? (nothing)
How come I can't see a the forest from the trees? (there is no time-line)
What do I want? (a chance to hope)
How sad are you? ( the same, the same)
Does it hurt? (like hell)
What happens now? (the page turns)
Does it matter? (Yes, no, maybe)
Why do I not get a lot of this? (Its cause you're fuckin wasting time sometimes!)
Saints and Sinners have been on my mind. The term has been popping up in my head. So is it ironic that I was dubbed a Saint, when in reality, all I have ever been was a sinner. One of God's jokes on me.
OK. Lets clear things up now...This means nothing to anyone. It means little to me. I know what I am leading to but it lack substance because, there is no substance to it. You... yeah you... in the corner... pay no heed to this. It's not about you... Hell, its not even about me.
They are my words, but it does not mean its all about me...the only things that are about me, are in my head.
And fuck the horses they road in on.