gj getting your hopes up, self.
so, the guy I like has a girlfriend. um, I'm... really, honestly not surprised? but that doesn't really make anything easier to deal with. had an explosion of temper last night, then found out about this, then kind of went blank. mm... idk. it hit me a little later, and I hid in the bathroom for a while because I felt like I was going to vomit... and, yeah. didn't cry much, but I'm ashamed to say I did cry a little, hahah.
mm.. yeah. still in a bit of shock, but I know myself well enough to know that no matter what I say, I'm not going to be able to give up on this. this is exactly what happened with Roy/Kelsey, too. couldn't give up on her either, but look what that did to both of us... eh, I don't know. maybe I'll luck out and meet someone else who can distract me.
it was just kind of funny how yesterday, his sister and his friend were both comforting me afterwards because they didn't know he was the person I was talking about. hahah. it was funny irony but also kind of uncomfortable and it just made me feel worse. and I still kind of feel like vomiting. errr...
still young, though? there's lots of time to get over this and move on. it's not like I'm not happy for him, because I totally am! more than anything, if he's happy, I'm fine. but, that doesn't really help a girl get over a crush? anyway.
school's okay, but this week's been shit and I'm kind of falling off the horse. gotta remember to do my homework. somehow.
also, gotta keep writing. u_u it'll keep me sane. because I'm an idiot and I get so emotional over these things and everything affects me so much more deeply than it should... so I need to keep expressing myself to get it all out, somehow, and writing is the easiest way.
mm.. yeah. still in a bit of shock, but I know myself well enough to know that no matter what I say, I'm not going to be able to give up on this. this is exactly what happened with Roy/Kelsey, too. couldn't give up on her either, but look what that did to both of us... eh, I don't know. maybe I'll luck out and meet someone else who can distract me.
it was just kind of funny how yesterday, his sister and his friend were both comforting me afterwards because they didn't know he was the person I was talking about. hahah. it was funny irony but also kind of uncomfortable and it just made me feel worse. and I still kind of feel like vomiting. errr...
still young, though? there's lots of time to get over this and move on. it's not like I'm not happy for him, because I totally am! more than anything, if he's happy, I'm fine. but, that doesn't really help a girl get over a crush? anyway.
school's okay, but this week's been shit and I'm kind of falling off the horse. gotta remember to do my homework. somehow.
also, gotta keep writing. u_u it'll keep me sane. because I'm an idiot and I get so emotional over these things and everything affects me so much more deeply than it should... so I need to keep expressing myself to get it all out, somehow, and writing is the easiest way.