Coming to you from sunny LA
Well, for those of you who don't know, I am in California!!! We finished the movie at the end of last week and I decided it'd be better to come up here now and get everything set up so I can be at home during Christmas. The weather is absolutely gorgeous and I'm having a lot of fun exploring the city with a pretty great tour guide so far. The loft I'm staying at is pretty great. I mean, its nothing special or anything (not like your hotel, Craig!) but its enough room and I've unpacked most of my stuff so far. SO, it has actually worked out really well. Of course I miss everyone back home, especially Jess and Spin. Thank my lucky stars for unlimited cell minutes after 7 pm!
Anyway, Craig and I decided to let bygones be bygones and try to be friends again okay, so I saw him at the carnival a couple weeks before I came down here and he wanted to set things right before he left. And I maybe told a little white lie. I told him I'm not in love with him anymore. I don't even know why I said it...it just, like, came out. I guess I didn't want to be the vulnerable one anymore. Only now...I still am, I just hide it. He's been really great these past couple days...taking me to parties, introducing me to people, showing me what he knows so far of the city. Its just hard, because sometimes when we talk, I feel like...I dunno, I still feel something there and it's even harder because I can't tell if he feels it too or not. Sometimes I think maybe he does. But other times I dunno. I mean, he has a girlfriend anyway. Plus, there's Spinner, who Jess has informed me may like me more than I realized. I guess I just never realized he thought of what we have as anything serious. He really is great...amazing actually. I thought he saw it as just having fun. Ugh, everything is so confusing and I hate it.. WHICH has turned out to be awesome for ME because I got to meet JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE (who is probably 100 times hotter in person) AND I had someone to go to Disneyland with. So its been nice while we've both been here in the city. Too nice. I need to get over him. I don't feel TOTALLY alone.
Jess thinks I should tell him I lied before. I don't know if I can.
Well, I have an audition tomorrow morning so I'd better be going. Love you guys lots and I miss you tons! Can't wait to see everyone over Christmas!