The Chronicles of Narnia
I read The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe when I was about 8 or 9, but didn't know there were other books known collectively as The Chronicles of Narnia until the movie version of said book came out a few years ago. After falling in love with Harry Potter and enjoying the movie version of Prince Caspian (admittedly, I went to see it because Ben Barnes, along with Henry Cavill, is one of the prettiest BritBoys I've ever seen, but I actually liked the movie itself), I decided to read the whole sha-bang.
First of all, I appreciate that these books are Christian allegory. And I'm fine with that! Hell, I really love a lot of Medieval literature, and pretty much all of it is Christian allegory. But this was about the worst things that Christianity has had plaguing it for years: misogyny, xenophobia, anti-Islamic sentiments, dogma, and blind obedience/reverence. These came in ebbs and flows through the series, but each of the seven novels had each prevailing in some way. I found all of these personally offensive, and, honestly, I'm glad I didn't read all of these books as a child, because I think it would have warped me.
That being said, I did enjoy some things about these stories. There are some really fun and exciting yarns as the characters travel around Narnia and the surrounding countries on their various adventures. For the most part, if these were just written as adventure books, they would be pretty awesome. The problems come in the themes that course through the actions and the fact that almost all the characters are self-righteous and two-dimensional. One of the greatest triumphs of Harry Potter is that, as Sirius says in the movie of Order of the Phoenix, "The world isn't broken up into good people and Deatheaters. We both have light and darkness inside of us." In The Chronicles of Narnia, not only is everyone broken up into Goodies and Baddies, they are done so in such blatently annoying, obvious, and stereotypical ways: white people = good; dark people = bad/ men = strong and deserve to lead; women = weak and either must follow the men or are outright wicked. And the Goodies rarely ever waver in their goodness. And sometimes, even when they don't waver, they still get bitched out by Aslan (I'm speaking specifically of the scene in Prince Caspian where Lucy, who annoys the shit out of me, by the way, feels all guilty for not believing hard enough that Aslan was back in Narnia, even though she never actually doubted it!). He might be a benevolent God, but that doesn't mean he isn't a prick.
Okay, now to skip to the end, because this is why I wanted to rant. The end is the ultimate example of Rocks Fall, Everyone Dies! And then go to Heaven.
WHAT THE FUCK!?!?
I've read 750-some-odd pages of this crap, and this is what the end is??? Narnia literally gets destroyed (i.e. Rocks and Mountains Fall), everyone has the Final Judgment (Everyone Dies), and it turns out that Digory, Polly, Peter, Edmund, Lucy, Eustace, and Jill all died in a trainwreck in England and are now in Heaven. And the last bit with the trainwreck, is revealed on the last page, almost as an afterthought by Aslan. And what's worse, Susan basically grows up and discovers Elvis, boys, and make-up. Apparently this means she's now a whore who deserves to have her entire family die tragically and leave her all alone in the world. Benevolent God, my ass. Aslan's a more vidictive than Yehweh in the Old Testament.
There's a reason it took me 10 months to actually finish this book...
First of all, I appreciate that these books are Christian allegory. And I'm fine with that! Hell, I really love a lot of Medieval literature, and pretty much all of it is Christian allegory. But this was about the worst things that Christianity has had plaguing it for years: misogyny, xenophobia, anti-Islamic sentiments, dogma, and blind obedience/reverence. These came in ebbs and flows through the series, but each of the seven novels had each prevailing in some way. I found all of these personally offensive, and, honestly, I'm glad I didn't read all of these books as a child, because I think it would have warped me.
That being said, I did enjoy some things about these stories. There are some really fun and exciting yarns as the characters travel around Narnia and the surrounding countries on their various adventures. For the most part, if these were just written as adventure books, they would be pretty awesome. The problems come in the themes that course through the actions and the fact that almost all the characters are self-righteous and two-dimensional. One of the greatest triumphs of Harry Potter is that, as Sirius says in the movie of Order of the Phoenix, "The world isn't broken up into good people and Deatheaters. We both have light and darkness inside of us." In The Chronicles of Narnia, not only is everyone broken up into Goodies and Baddies, they are done so in such blatently annoying, obvious, and stereotypical ways: white people = good; dark people = bad/ men = strong and deserve to lead; women = weak and either must follow the men or are outright wicked. And the Goodies rarely ever waver in their goodness. And sometimes, even when they don't waver, they still get bitched out by Aslan (I'm speaking specifically of the scene in Prince Caspian where Lucy, who annoys the shit out of me, by the way, feels all guilty for not believing hard enough that Aslan was back in Narnia, even though she never actually doubted it!). He might be a benevolent God, but that doesn't mean he isn't a prick.
Okay, now to skip to the end, because this is why I wanted to rant. The end is the ultimate example of Rocks Fall, Everyone Dies! And then go to Heaven.
WHAT THE FUCK!?!?
I've read 750-some-odd pages of this crap, and this is what the end is??? Narnia literally gets destroyed (i.e. Rocks and Mountains Fall), everyone has the Final Judgment (Everyone Dies), and it turns out that Digory, Polly, Peter, Edmund, Lucy, Eustace, and Jill all died in a trainwreck in England and are now in Heaven. And the last bit with the trainwreck, is revealed on the last page, almost as an afterthought by Aslan. And what's worse, Susan basically grows up and discovers Elvis, boys, and make-up. Apparently this means she's now a whore who deserves to have her entire family die tragically and leave her all alone in the world. Benevolent God, my ass. Aslan's a more vidictive than Yehweh in the Old Testament.
There's a reason it took me 10 months to actually finish this book...