16 days... and counting...
Since mid-November, everyday, everytime I see the date I can't stop counting down the days until December 27th... -_-;;; Normally, I'd be counting down the days until Christmas, but since I already got my presents from my both my mom and and ex-step mom, and since I can't eat any candy (except fat-free stuff like swedish fishies) until after my surgery, I can't stop counting down the days until I'll be gall bladder-less. I know that it's day surgery, and that it really isn't that big of a deal, that there's no way I'll die, and that I myself was the one who wanted it as soon as possible, but... having an organ removed from your body really is a scaaaaaary prospect. Each time I'm reminded of it, I can't stop thinking, "what if? what if?" Normally, I try my best to take things as they come, and not to worry to much about it, but I keep on thinking about things like, "what if they make a mistake and I die? what if I'm in a ton of pain afterward? How long will it be until I can actually move around? what if I'm in pain for weeks? what if the wound gets infected and it becomes serious?" things like that... and it just keeps on getting worse the closer to the date it is.
Actually, right after the date was decided, I started trying to get my whole family together for Christmas, since I have no memory of everyone being together on that day (the only times everyone has been together had been for things like graduation. -_-;;;). My family really doesn't get along. My Mom and Dad can't stand each other's guts, and Sarah, my ex-step mom, really doesn't want to be around my Dad (although he has these delusions that Sarah wronged him and it's about time she reached out and apologized. He has a girlfriend, but he's still intent on going over to his ex-wife's house. And wow, it was actually Dad who really wronged Sarah, even I know that! He's very delusional about certain things, and it's kinda creepy. I feel that recently he's even become sort of my stalker, and I am NOT amused. He also lets his girlfriend bully me, and doesn't even stop her from making me cry...). Anyway, the Christmas idea FAILED. I don't even want to go into how much of a headache that was... But I guess I had the kinda "last Christmas" feeling and wanted to see everyone one last time? Kinda ridiculous, but that's my subconscious.
So, yeah... Somehow, somehow, I'm going to finish this semester, and become a member of the gall bladder-less population. And on the day of, I'm going to wear my favorite Zoro shirt which I bought in Tokyo, for good luck. Unfortunately, considering how much of an idiot Zoro is, and considering that he was willing to cut his own feet off, I'm still unsure of the wisdom of this idea. Also, one time, two months ago, when I wore my Zoro shirt to the hospital, they took my blood, I passed out, was coded blue (or as I said, "code blued-ed"), and sent to the emergency room... -_-;;; But the next time I wore him to the hospital, I was fine... and that was the time I took the gall stone out of my bile duct, through a tube down my throat... although I think that I really didn't like that, but I can't really remember because of the drugs....
Actually, right after the date was decided, I started trying to get my whole family together for Christmas, since I have no memory of everyone being together on that day (the only times everyone has been together had been for things like graduation. -_-;;;). My family really doesn't get along. My Mom and Dad can't stand each other's guts, and Sarah, my ex-step mom, really doesn't want to be around my Dad (although he has these delusions that Sarah wronged him and it's about time she reached out and apologized. He has a girlfriend, but he's still intent on going over to his ex-wife's house. And wow, it was actually Dad who really wronged Sarah, even I know that! He's very delusional about certain things, and it's kinda creepy. I feel that recently he's even become sort of my stalker, and I am NOT amused. He also lets his girlfriend bully me, and doesn't even stop her from making me cry...). Anyway, the Christmas idea FAILED. I don't even want to go into how much of a headache that was... But I guess I had the kinda "last Christmas" feeling and wanted to see everyone one last time? Kinda ridiculous, but that's my subconscious.
So, yeah... Somehow, somehow, I'm going to finish this semester, and become a member of the gall bladder-less population. And on the day of, I'm going to wear my favorite Zoro shirt which I bought in Tokyo, for good luck. Unfortunately, considering how much of an idiot Zoro is, and considering that he was willing to cut his own feet off, I'm still unsure of the wisdom of this idea. Also, one time, two months ago, when I wore my Zoro shirt to the hospital, they took my blood, I passed out, was coded blue (or as I said, "code blued-ed"), and sent to the emergency room... -_-;;; But the next time I wore him to the hospital, I was fine... and that was the time I took the gall stone out of my bile duct, through a tube down my throat... although I think that I really didn't like that, but I can't really remember because of the drugs....