006 ✰ voice

[renegadeparagon]

[There is a pause before the message comes, a silence of dead air in which anyone could think that no message is coming. A faint sigh does follow, however, and finally Commander Shepard's low voice, with nothing jovial about the tone, though he makes sure not to let his unhappiness seep into it either. He keeps his voice controlled, careful, even

Comments

[sheistheswarm]

text;

Down in the gym, Commander.

[renegadeparagon]

action

[Shepard doesn't respond, he just heads to what they call the gym. It's really just James Vega's workout station in the shuttle deck, but it's where most of them tend to train; at the least the ones of them who live on the ship full time.

Stepping past the consoles, he heads over towards her, with a small frown creasing his brow.] Kerrigan.

[sheistheswarm]

[ Kerrigan is already looking at the doorway as he steps in, pulling her long red hair back into a ponytail. She simply raises an eyebrow. Dressed in a tank top and a pair of pants she raided from the ship wardrobe, Kerrigan almost feels at home on the Normandy.

Almost. ]

It was different when he left this time, John. [ She doesn't bother asking if that's what he really wants to know. She simply says it. ] Thoughts when someone dies fade. This was instant.

[renegadeparagon]

[Dammit. She knew exactly what he wanted to know, because she can read his thoughts, but he's not sure which answer he was hoping for. If Kaidan had still been here, or died here, she'd know. Instead, he simply vanished, went home, gone.]

Alright. Thank you, Sarah. [He looks up at the gym equipment and wonders about training with her, but he's not sure he has the mind for it right now.] You're settling in well.

[sheistheswarm]

[ There's an offer of a small smile for him. It doesn't really help, and she knows it. Comfort only goes so far when someone loses part of their heart. Kerrigan looks down. She hopes that's not what Jim is going through right now. ]

I'm just following notions. [ She shrugs. ] I'm not sure I've ever known how to belong anywhere.

[renegadeparagon]

Mandalus is hard to get used to.

[He leans against James' old console, absently eyeing the dormant shuttles. Somehow, he feels like he can understand her, and maybe if he offers her his own story, she'll feel less isolated.] Have I ever told you how I became a soldier?

[sheistheswarm]

It's not Mandalus.

[ Kerrigan looks up at him. He's thought about it often enough, but she's never indulged the idea in asking him. ] I can't say that you have. From what I gather? You're a big shot back home.

[renegadeparagon]

It's you, isn't it? You can't feel right, no matter where it is?

[He chuckles lightly at that, shrugging a little bit.] Unfortunately. I never wanted that fame, but it's there, and it's what people like Kai Leng and... [A sigh.] Corporal Sciacchitano use as a foothold to judge me for the things I've done. The life of a celebrity, I guess.

[He shakes his head faintly.] My parents died when I was a kid. I don't remember them and I grew up on the streets, in a gang. We operated back and forth between two countries, called America and Canada. We were pretty damn good at hopping the border, actually. It was bad, really bad, and we didn't care what we did, just as long as we got food and shelter that night. I didn't want to stay like that, so I enlisted in the Systems Alliance. [Shepard shakes his head again, with a frown.] I was damn good at my job, and I was put through the N7 program. It was Hell. It's twenty hours a day, constant training, minimal food and rest. Kai went through it too. [A pause.] Then I was assigned as Lieutenant

[sheistheswarm]

Ghosts don't belong anywhere, John. We don't exist. We're trained to kill without asking questions. [ Even if she's looking at him, she sounds far away for a moment. Thinking about a life she thought she was rescued from. ]

Corporal Sciacchitano needs to learn how a soldier acts. [ While she can sympathize with the guy? He needs to knock it the hell off and grow a pair. Wars won't let you go home by bitching a lot.

Kerrigan turns and sits down, pulling a leg up on the work out bench and listening. She recalls seeing the younger Shepard and Kai Leng in the streets of Mandalus. The names of countries are possibly from what she knows as Old Earth, but her Sector hadn't talked to them since they populated the sector. If the stories were true. ] You'd think Kai would respect you more if you two went through the same program. He just seems to resent you for even breathing sometimes.

[ Her gaze moves forward as she gently scratches at the '24' mark on her arm. It's faded, but it'll always be there. A brand mark of the Confederacy to mark