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You Are Artemis!
Brave, and a natural born leader.
You're willing to fight for what you believe in...
And willing to make tough decisions.
Don't forget - the people around you have ideas too!
What Goddess Are You? Take This Quiz :-)
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The other day I was driving along side a train and had the urge to drive into it... I guess I have a lot of feeling srunning through my head lately. When i went out shopping with my mom, I spent about 15 minutes outside my car crying on the phone to Ian because my mother had .. had an accident in my car. And I was angry. but then I was sad. I don't want to lose my mother but I wonder if she doesn't just.. have a death wish. or just is waiting to die. Everything points.. in one way or another to her not caring about herself. My dad and I talked and I started crying in front of him for the same reason. I can't stand the idea that my mother... might not be with me longer. Much longer anyway. I don't think I can go through losing another mother. I miss Faith a lot by the way. I .. find myself thinking about her and what I would have gotten her for her christmas present. And how she would have looked in umpteen years. I don't think I deserve her son either. I don't believe that I deserve either of the two hearts i've put in vices and squeezed every ounce out of. I feel like dissappearing sometimes. that is probably why i only want to sleep. and why i only want to shop/by myself. with no one. I don't like being a lone. but i'm enjoying being lonely. And i hope this is the weather or something because I can't get myself to just.. wise up. And look around. This is only today right? this is just for today. But it sure seems like it keeps happening this way. I can't get out of this deep funk. And this is probably why I feel like so much.. beat up meat. Like i shouldn't be with anyone. I worry that I have to be with someone to feel important, like i'm not importantn if i'm not with someone. I hope this feeling goes away. I also can't place why I can't look at Andy and just htink "okay. he's my manager, and I don't feel bad that he's flirting with all of these girls, and completely ignoring me". Why do I care? ... He has such a bad reputation about being "Andy Delewhore" and having dated a "30 year old* I shouldn't care. But I do. Why?