Eating Crow

[mamahammer]

Before I start into this new subject, let me first add a caveat to what I said the other day. there are people whom I look to for opinions and advice. The ladies I know here, are among those people. Lan, I would hope you know that just being able to chat with you IRL heps me with a lot of things. I just become irritated when people offer there

Comments

Hey there...

[jerri_blank_1]

Stop by when you get a chance....

[devil_kitty_1]

*nodding head*

I find that I enjoy my dates with Jarrod more now than I did pre-Hank. Why? Because the time alone is so much more precious these days than it was back then because it is so much more rare.

These dates are also helping me remember why I married Jarrod. I really *like* him. I love him more than anything, but I also like him as a person, a friend and now a father. He's a pretty neat, funny, sexy, handsome guy. Those things get muddled between nursing and diapers so its nice to see those feelings resurface.

I'm so glad you have come to realize that you and Matt are intrinsically different than your dad and Robbi were.

[upennmama]

ITA with B.

[mamahammer]

It has taken a loooonnnggg time, but I have finally realized, not just with my head but in my heart, that Robbi and I are two very different people. I had these fears throughout my life of having kids and abandoning them like she did, and it haunted me. Like one day I would just wake up and be her. I don't just know it, but I can feel it way down inside that she is not the person I am. It's hard. I don't know why it was so hard, but it was the most difficult thing I think I've done - getting past those fears and the real belief that I could be capable of what she has done.

[jerri_blank_1]

You make such an excellent point. I think we are often quick to define a relationship/family by one thing. Like...Susie did X with her baby and it did Y, so doing X must be the only way to get Y results. When, really, there are so many variables in parenting, marriage, etc. KWIM?

[mamahammer]

Another thing that has truly been eye-opening in this journey. People, relationships, are not defined by the outer characteristics the world sees. It is so much more than that.

[rebelbets]

You know, Jacq - and I hope you don't mind that I'm lurking around here - when you post stuff like this it really gets me to thinking about my beliefs regarding motherhood and how I will handle my children and such. I have such strong opinions about it now, but I'm sure they may all fly right out the window when little ones do arrive. As much as I hate to hear people say things like, "You can't understand until you've been there," I believe it's true.

I love reading about how your family is growing and changing....it makes me wonder about (and look forward to) the changes I will experience when I become a mother, too.

[rebelbets]

Doh - and in case you're wondering who the heck I am, it's Betsy/Ole Miss Bride. :)

[mamahammer]

Welcome! I'm glad someone's getting something out of my ramblings!

[jacksonsmama]

My goodness, I could have written your ENTIRE post myself! You know what's even funnier than you saying what you would/wouldn't do before Thomas got here??? I actually remember seeing what a transformation you did after Thomas arrived and how you started doing everything you said you wouldn't do and I thought, "There is NO WAY motherhood is going to have that effect on me. I am going to be the exception to the rule and stick to everything I said pre-Jackson". Then Jackson arrived.... and I realized that I knew absolutely NOTHING before he got here. It is pretty darn amazing what these little guys do to us, huh? I think that the changes that you have gone through are just beautiful and Thomas is a very lucky little boy. :)